FMIL at Bachelorette Party? Really? *Update

That's inappropriate on many levels. From her inviting herself to any function, to her being at the BP. Have your FH deal with it, either directly or through your FFIL.

The last wedding we all went to, the FMIL was included in the BP so I think that's where she got the idea it was normal. But they went to a Piano bar for one night, not a hotel for a weekend.

I dont see the big deal...my FMIL was at my bachelorette party saturday and we had a blast! we had a pole dance instruction and a passion party and she was really into everything which was hilarious to me! she even tried a few moves on the pole! lol AND she got us a toy from the passion party!

Ouch, that's awkward. I agree with Mrs. S that it was totally inappropriate for her to invite herself, but now you have to deal with risking upsetting her. I think it's kind of weird that she would want to go, and gives me the impression that she might think of herself as trying to be "young and fun" and if you tell her she can't go, she might get offended and upset that you don't want to have her around, especially since FFIL is going to go bachelor party.

That is just how I would picture the situation though and might be completely off base, but I would definitely have your FH handle it or ask him to have his dad talk some sense in to her.

Also, I know a lot of girls wont think it is weird or a big deal, but not everyone has that type of relationship with even their own mother, and especially not their FMIL. I would be completely MORTIFIED if my mom or MIL were at a sex toy party with me, and I wouldn't be comfortable hanging out with them at a bar or hotel party because we just don't have that kind of relationship.

It all depends on the relationship with the FMIL. I don't think I'd have a problem, but it was kind of presumptious for her to invite herself.

I would not want my FMIL going to mine, whether we are doing something inappropriate or not. It's girls night! I think you should have your fiance talk to her. I wouldn't know how to un-invite her without sounding rude.

See my mom and i share everything! its never weird for me to talk to her about toys, sex, anything like that and its not weird for me to talk about those things with FMIL either, i mean we all sit around and talk about whatever with family

I don't want to upset her, but I also dont want to have to worry about entertaining her either. She will only know one girl at my BP besides me. My MOH and I have have talked about changing the party. We would get a limo, drive to Daytona (45 minutes away), go to local bars and then drive back that night. Maybe if she knows its gonna be a super late night she wont want to go?

It could work, but she could also say she's just going to catch a cab back?

What does your FH say?

My mom and MIL were at my bachelorette party, but only the dinner portion. We went to dinner first at a Greek restaurant, then myself and the rest of the ladies walked along a busy/happening street doing silly things before going to a club. But I had told my mom and MIL they were only allowed to come to the dinner since I wanted to let loose and have fun without them seeing that stuff.

My dad and DH's dad went to DH's bachelor party also. My dad stayed for the whole thing, including the naked lady portion. DH's dad on the other hand bailed before that party.

My sisters mother in law went with us for the bachelorette party and even made my sister a penis cake haha...I suppose it depends on if your close to her or not an if you get along...I dont know if mine will come yet but I get along with her so I wouldnt mind if she did

We are having a Co-Ed shower with all the FIL's firends and family. I think that can be their party time. I want my BP to be my night with just the girls

I wouldn't show up to my own Bachrlorette party if my FMIL invited herself and showed up! My MOH can't stand my FMIL so I know that won't happen whatsoever. I would tell FMIL this is for you and your bridal party only! I don't even want my own mother at my bachelorette party LOL. I would definitely have FH talk to her!

Amy you always crack me up!!

That's awkward though...it's always awkward when someone invites themselves along.

What has your FH said about it?

We have been going back and forth about it all day. This is what he finally told me. "I think my Mom believes she's included because my dad invited himself along. I think they (more my mom) need to take a step back. This is not her wedding, not her plans. It's one thing if you ask an opinion or invite but pushing needs to stop" Oh I love my FH. Now the only problem is how do we tell them? lol

I definitely wouldn't want my FMIL to attend my bachelorette party. I want to be able to say whatever I want and drink as much as I want and not have to worry about how that will affect her opinion of me. I think your FH should tell her that it isn't appropriate for her to - especially if she wasn't invited.

Yea my FMIL basically invited herself too cause we were hanging out at the bar and I was talking to my bridesmaids about it and she's all "oh yea! we are gonna have so much fun!" I looked at my bridesmaid and her and we both looked shocked. UGH I can't tell her no though I'd feel so bad

I think it all depends on the relationship you have with your MIL. My brother just got married and my mom and a few of her friends went to the BP for his fiancée and it was a blast. I am very close with my future MIL and would love having her at mine. If the relationship you two have isn't that way, your FH should definitely see what he can do about getting her not to be there.

OH MY GOSH. No, no, no way!! Have your FH take care of this... how are you supposed to have a good time when you have FMIL looking over your shoulder?