Exes invited to wedding/reception?

Lol ... not really exes but people FH dated like high school and right out of college will be at the wedding. They're married now and FH is friends w both of their spouses and we've all hung out together. They're really his friends and it doesn't bother me they'll be at the wedding.

None of my exes will be there bc i am not friends with any of those fools.

Unless these are ex girlfriends from a really long time ago, ya know, like the cute little girl with a bow in her hair you "dated" that one time in 6th grade, I would be against inviting them. I would personally feel awkward AF. And if my FH danced with them I would be real displeased. Lucky for me FH doesn't have any exes, and I'm not a jealous person, but what's mine is mine!

You've never met them? That would be grounds for no invite on its own, let alone you being uncomfortable with them there at all.

We invited one of DH's ex-girlfriends, but she and I get along fabulously and they broke up nearly 10 years ago. That's really the only case I see inviting exes appropriate - if they're genuinely good friends and there are no hard feelings all around.

That is YOUR special day. I don't think memories of the EX should be included on your day. She is the "past" and should remain there.

We each have an ex coming. They are good friends of us, and most of the time I forget either are exes. We both broke up with these particular exes in 2004. There are more recent exes of both of us though that would be so awkward to have there

I think it depends on the ex and what the current relationship is like with the ex. Personally, I have only 1 ex I am inviting. My FH never dated anyone before me, so he has no ex coming. He is okay with me inviting my ex, but in this case, the ex is a close friend to me, and a decent friend to FH. We were only together for a few months, and we split because we agreed it was weird and would be better as friends. Any other ex? No way. I wouldn't do it. And by the sounds of it, your FH has a lot of exs to invite, and it is unusual for someone to be friends with that many former lovers.

I wouldn't invite them to the ceremony or reception. FH should be more understanding, it's awkward.

I appreciate all your input. I guess he and I will need to discuss it further as it is his day as well. And if he truely considers them friends, I will have to accept that. He is, after all, marrying me. As for the not dancing with them... well, I would feel awkward knowing he had been 'with them' and seeing them together holding each other weither its slow dancing or up beat it and its not something i want to remember on our wedding day. But I can't get him to understand it. Its ok though. Its just one day, right? I get him for the rest of our life.

I would definitely not be comfortable with this. I suppose some may have a unique situation where it may not be so awkward, but FH's exes (and my own) are the last people I want to see at my wedding (or anywhere).

They are his exes for a reason. We invited exes on both sides to our wedding. Mine couldn't make it. 2 of his did. No one cared. We've also been to one of his exes weddings. You are adults. Adults have pasts. But in the end, you chose each other. Be mature and let him invite his friends, no strings attached.

This wouldn't have flown in my wedding.

H and I were just talking about this after I read this thread. He was like uhh no?

But that street goes both ways. I wouldnt have considered inviting an ex of mine, and he certainly wouldnt have invited his.

I would not be okay with this. i dont think you are overreacting. I would stand my ground.

I don't think it's ok only for one day. Why should you feel that way on your wedding day. He's wrong. Stand your ground

So based on your update it sounds like he is insisting on dancing with them? I find that strange.

Haha I guess I am an odd ball here but my ex is in my wedding party. But he is my best friend and FH is also friendly with him. The three of us have hung out and we have also been on double dates. I have another ex coming too but we dated for like 2 days and then decided we were bettee as friends.

Also, my ex whose in my wedding party is my former competitive ballroom dance partner so I have a feeling we will be dancing (albiet "real" dancing).

I'm actually really close with one of my ex's. We dated for about a year but ended it because we agreed we were better friends. He's met my FH and they get along and I'm inviting him to the wedding. I don't get why people get upset over ex's. They are an ex for a reason.

I would personally tell them to stay at home. I agree the past should be left in the past and if it makes you uncomfortable then you should really have a talk with him. You should be comfortable on your big day.

@OP is he insisting he is planning on dancing with him?? Or is this something that you just thought to clarify?

You don't even know them. I personally wouldn't have exes at my wedding if it were all awkward or uncomfortable. He should respect that. I don't think you are at all overreacting.

So call me petty or insecure or whatever. But our wedding day is not the day I want to meet my new husband's old girlfriend for the first time. Unless this is someone he dated like freshman year of high school and never went past first base with .....actually even then I don't like the idea of having anyone at our wedding that husband's ever had a boner over. Sorry.

ETA: we also have a strict "if I've seen this person naked then we no longer speak" rule in our relationship