Drinking before the wedding?

I am worried about this too. My guy has two drinks and his eyes turn bloodshot! I told him after the ceremony he can drink as much as he wants, he can handle his booze, but his eyes cant. I don't want our pictures to be ruined!

Ive already brought this up to my fiance. His eyes get really red so I just said its really important to me that he limit himself before the ceremony and pictures. These pictures are VERY expensive and I don't want them to look bad. He understood and said he would. I would just be honest in a nice way without sounding demanding.

Well I'd point out that your marriage isn't legal if he's been drinking and that many officiants/priests wont perform a marriage if they suspect either person is under the infulence.

Let him know it's OK to have a few beers but that's it till coctail hour then he's free to party it up.

Welcome to the WeddignWire Community @Jeni L

Happy planning!!

I expect them to have a a drink or two, and I luckily don't have to deal with the red eyes or anything but I don't imagine he would over indulge. I would think any guy should be smart enough not to considering they would just be making an ass out of themselves slurring through their vows!

Congrats & welcome

Just remind him how much you paid for the photographer and that you don't want his drunk eyes messing up the photos. Everyone above gave great tips. Drink it up after the ceremony/photos.

start to make you yo do lists.. your brain will be mush

Wed: Pick up tuxes, Pack bag for Sat night. (You'll thank me) Thurs: Drop off at hall - centerpieces, cake topper, flutes, cake knifes, seating chart/cards, etc. Fri: Mani/Pedi with girls, massage for the bride. Bring bridal shower ribbon bouquet, music selection (ipod) marriage license to rehearsal for officiant. Bring Wedding party/parent gifts to rehearsal dinner. Sat: button down shirt, veil or hair pins/combs. Programs, guest book, bubbles, flower girl basket, RB pillow, etc. bridal emergency kit.

I think my fiance already knows LOL! He's not much of a drinker, anyway, and we're not having any hard liquor on premises because I don't want people getting super out of hand (esp since getting in and out of the venue is going to be fun enough as it is, haha)

MrsSmith... I love your matter-of-fact answer

You also want to think of how you will get a car to the hotel if you are taking a limo from your home to the wedding. The men may need to play musical cars while you are getting your hair done. Also, designate who will need to bring the items to the church or hall if you will be in a limo.

Don't forget to pack A bag to put your dress in the next day when you at at the hotel.... unless you think you will remember to grab the one your dress is in now (But you probably will forget the nice one in the room you are getting ready in)

An Idea if you have time ~ romance basket ~ dollar store toasting flutes, bottle of champagne, bottle opener, matches, candles, oils - lotions, sexy i-pod mix ~ for the hotel room

I don't think this is a matter of "controlling"; you have good reason for not wanting him to drink too much, and I'd be concerned if he disagreed. My FH and I discussed and said we'd limit ourselves to a couple of drinks--until we get to the after party

I thought about how to approach this, as well, especially since our ceremony doesn't start until 6 pm and I'm sure he will be hanging out with his old friends who will be in town during the day. I definitely like my wine, so I just made a comment about both of us not drinking too much beforehand. There will be lots of running around, switching of cars, etc., so I'm sure he will hold up his end of the deal. I do think it would be nice to have a glass of champagne during the first look photos or while my MOH and I are getting ready.

I feel like if you talk to him calmly and explain what your concerns are, he should be understanding and you won't come off as controlling. Just, obviously, don't say something like "You are not allowed to drink more than x before the ceremony." Say something more like "I'm concerned if you drink more than x before the ceremony you a)won't remember it b)will feel icky during it or c)won't look great in our expensive pictures. Is there any way you can tell your buddies ahead of time so that they don't pressure you into drinking more than you want to before the ceremony? You can let them know that afterwards it's all fair game!"

The night of our Wedding Rehearsal our coordinator told us that if any of the wedding party showed up to the wedding, and it was apparent that they had been drinking, they would not be able to marry us. Whether this is true or not with your venue, you can always have your coordinator, or officiant, state that this is the case with your wedding as well. That pretty much solves the problem since no-one wants to be the reason you can't get married.

FH and I discussed this too because we are worried about them overdoing it a little before hand. The hotel we got our room block at has two golf courses. I think they plan on going golfing the day of so they're not bored all day and resort to picking up a couple drinks.

My mom is a wedding Officiant and she told us that in PA an Officiant cannot even perform the ceremony if the couple appears drunk. Just like you can't get a tattoo if you are drunk, or purchase a car. It's a legal thing.

At our rehearsal the day before the wedding our minister told us if anyone showed up with booze on their breath, especially the bride & groom she would not be marrying us. It also helped that our ceremony was at 12:30 p.m, so not really appropriate to get drunk in the morning.

After the ceremony....well, my DH, I and our wedding party did definitely enjoy some wine and hard alcohol.

Lol, the day of our wedding I could care less if I sound controlling. I already told FH to cool it with the booze before hand. If he wants to drink at dinner that's fine, but I feel like this is one of those times where I don't have to be the "cool wife".

And like many others have said....generally officiants won't perform the ceremony if either B or G appears drunk.

I am just afraid his"boys" will influence him. The last wedding we were at the guys had two long islands and shots of tequila before the ceremony even started!

Thanks to everyone! I feel better knowing I am not the only one with this fear. I talked to Tim on his lunch break and took the advice and was calm. I was surprised at how well he took it. He understood and I was so relieved I almost cried, I didn't realize how afraid I was.

You all are great, thanks so much for getting me through this!!!