Cash Bar

SO. MANY. TERRIBLE. IDEAS.

We are having a morning wedding and then lunch. We are having a bottle of white and a bottle of red wine on each table and icing down 4-5 cases of beer. We have 60 guests. It's not that much money to spend and not everyone there will drink but it's the thought that counts.

We got engaged in August, we started buying alcohol the month after. FH and I started buying wine in bulk then moved on to bottles of liquor. We've got most of our bar complete and we only have beer and mixers left. I don't even think we've spent $500 yet but we have enough alcohol in our garage to supply about 200 people right now. Our crowd likes to party and we want to make sure they are properly hosted. Our venue allows us to bring in our own alcohol and bartender it cut cost tremendously. Also we rented nothing from our venue except the venue itself and tables and chairs, and we also found a caterer that does decor so our major expenses are out of the way, with the total costs so far at 9500, our budget is 20k(25% of both our incomes combined), we are coming in wayyyyy under budget so far.

Just plan smart and don't get caught up in the pinterest/IG weddings, you can find everything you need and want for a decent price you just have to look around and do a ton of research

I'm getting married for the 2nd time so I guess I kind of know some of this stuff. I will tell you that my first time was kind of a back yard deal under a tent. I provided beer and wine. We saved up and bought the wine a few bottles at a time. For the beer we waited until a month or so out and hit every sale we could at the stores. We did fine and barely touched half that alcohol. Long story short. If you are really frugal about it you can provide alcohol.

What the hell did I click on?!

Echoing all PP who know proper hosting: it's rude. Don't do it. I don't carry cash at weddings. And it's sooooo selfish to be all "it's my day! Celebrate me and give me gifts but you buy your alcohol!"

Sh ice tea! All the "its my wedding"

Look yall... have good etiquette and be a good host. Otherwise people will talk shit and you will be judged. Priorities: alcohol should have been included along with food. Everything else is extra, you don't really need those flowers now.

And just because you don't drink because you are underage or cheap, doesn't mean that the rest of the world thinks like you.

OP - You should update your original post so that people know what you decided to do. Some people will not read the 8 pages of comments

Wait.. I am not doing an open bar for many reasons. Weddings aren't about getting trashed. You are there to show love and support. I am not paying for the top shelf drinks that two sips get taken out of and then they get placed down on a table somewhere leading the person to just go get another one. Also, I will not have a sloppy wedding with people sick and/or possibly fighting. Too much alcohol never ends well. And on top of all of that, I care very much about my guests and am providing a shuttle to and from our hotel. I do not want to be responsible for those having to drive home drunk.

I'm a little surprised at everyone saying how completely unacceptable this is. If you need to get wasted at a wedding, cram it all in during cocktail hour to save yourself $20-40 that is apparently a huge burden.

^Who said anything about getting trash?

@Brianna why does open bar automatically mean people getting trashed, sick and/or fighting with each other?

I have never done nor seen any of those things, and every wedding I've ever gone to was an open bar.

@Brianna, you don't want a sloppy wedding, but you'll allow sloppy hosting? Okay.

Yeah at least have beer and wine.I was in a dry wedding and even though it was my child hiid friend I couldn't wait to get a drink and get outta there.Security came so many time because people were having bottles out.

Read through these comments and WOW!! So much for a non-judgmental, culturally sensitive forum. I've been to MANY weddings with a cash bar and have never talked poorly about the newlyweds because of it. Nor did I feel it was rude for them not to offer an open bar. You will have a variety of people who feel differently about this. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. Do what best suits you, whether it be for cost or other reasons. It is YOUR day after all.

Brianna-

1.) how many weddings have you been to - or heard of that someone got obliterated into fighting? like actual drunk fighting not just family tiffs?

2.) why would you NOT want your friends to drink and have a good time?

My whole GOAL besides get married- and have fabulous pictures- was to get drunk.

It's a fucking party. drink- sing- do something a little ridiculous. that is the fucking definition of a party.

You don't want people to have a good time- elope and don't invite people.

Brianna no one goes to a wedding to get trashed. It sounds like you have wonderful friends, and you'll treat them in gracious and celebratory way. Not.

Ah yes, "It's YOUR DAY!" Typical one star comment.

The minute you have one guest who wants a glass of wine, it is no longer YOUR day. Don't try to make an entire population forum feel guilty for attempting to help the OP before SHE does something 'culturally insensitive" (That's a new one; kudos for the creativity...)

,

I think it just may depend on where you are from. In North Dakota having a cash bar is just a usual thing. If you can have an open bar...great! But it's not common.

We ended up having extra money to spend so I am going to be opening the bar up from an hour or two. But that's it.

So to the OP just do what you are comfortable with. If you are going to be having a cash bar. Put that on your website so your guests know.

To all you others who say you MUST have an open bar. Don't ever come to ND unless you are prepared to pay for your own drinks. And you should look at cutting your drinking down if you NEED TO leave early just so you can get some alcohol in your systems. You probably shouldn't have been at that wedding then. A wedding is to celebrate the love of the bride and groom. Not for you to throw a bunch of alcohol in your systems because you think you need it to have fun.

Top ten reasons for a dry wedding;

10.My family is a bunch of drunken losers who will get sloppy, dance on the bar and get into fistfigthts in the parking lot.

9. No one in my family or friends drink.

8. We're really Christian. All of us. Every single one.

7. My grandmother would be offended and her feelings are more important than the other 200 guests.

6. We're both in rehab. (While this seems like a great excuse, many people here will tell you that it's not

5. I don't like the taste of it, and I don't care who does.

4. It's my day, I'll do what I want.

3. I don't like the smell of alcohol

2. We're underage. All of us. Every single guest.

AND>>>>>>>>>>>>

1. We don't want want to spend the money. We over-invited and we don't have the money. Which is really the only reason.

ETD to not name call

Briana- if people "cram it in" during cocktail hour they will get drunker quicker, so your logic is flawed there.

SoontobeMrs- it's not a regional thing, it's a social circle thing. Prepare for the rush to the bar when your cutoff occurs. Imagine if Uncle Dave gets a mixed drink at 6:59 but at 7:01 Grandma behind him has to pay for a glass of wine. I would be upset and confused.

There are many legitimate reasons why a person might choose to have a dry wedding. I am not underage. I am not cheap. I am choosing to have a dry wedding because FH and I do not drink. Everyone in my family knows alcohol is not included when I plan any gathering. My college grad party was dry. Less than a year ago my aunt passed from alcoholism, and I'm not over it. Everyone who loves me is fully aware and respects that. It is possible to be a proper host without alcohol. Alcohol is not a need in anyone's life. Water is a need. Nutrients are a need. Alcohol is a want.

Ryanna, maybe you should search some of my other posts, like the ones that find MUA's, venues. DJ's, marriage laws, other officiants, even sources for rings before you feel compelled to announce that I'm tearing brides down.