Cash bar or dry wedding

Omg I love you!!

View Quoted Comment Agreed! We went to a wedding of our friends right out of undergrad and they chose to profit from their open bar ($10 for wine/beer $15 for cocktail) so we opened our card and took the money out. They ended up up getting an empty card. So many of the other guests were doing the same.

Not all venues allow you to bring your own alcohol in and it gets very expensive. I'm doing just wine and beer and for 129 guest it will run over $3000. My FH says he wants cash bar but I want to do a consumption open bar. We are running the numbers and seeing what we think will be the best route. I wish beer and wine was only $600 like someone else had.

Aww, thanks! If you’re praying for me anyway, can you ask for me to get a raise?

(I’m being sarcastic, because telling someone that you’ll pray for them is also rude )

The ceremony is about the couple. The reception is about guests. Any way you slice it, alcohol makes the party come alive!

Dry weddings and cash bars tend to have less of a party atmosphere. I have been to at least 10 dry weddings and after cake cutting at least three quarters of the guests left. If OP wants a short reception that works out perfectly.

Also, please don't pray for me. I'm all set. Thanks.

No prayers needed here either. Just free booze :-)

View Quoted Comment I budgeted and searched for a venue that would allow for me to bring my own alcohol. I literally couponed my alcohol, used winery direct discounts, mail inn rebates, and case discounts. Guest experiences was one of our biggest priorities. It wasn't luck. It was intentional planning and having a well-hosted event we could afford. We passed on many gorgeous/fun venues to attain our budget and priorities.

Go with the consumption bar.

In that mindset, a wedding is not necessary...at all. It's a luxury experience not a necessity.

Have your wedding the way you want to have it! We’re also doing a cash bar- all non alcoholic drinks are included to our guests along with dinner service. Your guests are there to celebrate you and your husband; if they decide to leave early and miss out on the party, then that’s their own loss! There are plenty of folks who don’t mind in the least bit- those are your people!

On a a side note, it’s sickening how women who clearly aren’t concerned about a budget act towards those of us who do. Why should we elope instead of having the wedding we deserve, simply because we don’t have a couple extra thousand dollars kickin’ around to provide open bar? Fortunately those ladies don’t have to attend our weddings, and they can enjoy their open bars and not worry about what others will think at a random strangers wedding. Humble yourselves, ladies. Good grief.

We’re doing hosted wine with dinner and cash bar after. Not great etiquette but it’s what we were willing to spend, so it is what it is.

You should do neither. I think that it is unfair for you as a host to impose your choice of not drinking on to your guest. As a good host you should try to make them feel welcome and def should not be paying for anything. In my opinion cash bars are just rude.

View Quoted Comment I completely agree, but be prepared for the mountain of crap you’re going to get for that comment. So I should push out my wedding a year or elope just so my guests can drink as much as they want for free? We’re feeding them a nice meal, photobooth, etc. They’re family and here to share the day with us, they don’t NEED free alcohol. So I support you lol

View Quoted Comment I had a strict budget. I don’t have a lot of money. I saved up for an open bar. And no one “deserves” a wedding.

View Quoted Comment Meh. I don’t care what gets said about my comment lol. There are plenty of other ‘comments’ flying around this thread that are just as honest. The woman on these forums will not guilt me into anything, and have no power in changing anything about my wedding day.

The forum is here to solicite advice- not to tell others that they’re being tacky or rude for having their day in a different way.

View Quoted Comment I’m so happy for you being able to do that! That’s great.

I disagree- I do deserve a wedding.

View Quoted Comment Who said we were spending thousands? We all have budgets. Very very very few users post saying they have an unlimited budget.

The ceremony is all about the couple. The reception is a thank you from the couple to the guests. We are critical to help you see from the POV from the guests. By pushing costs onto your guests you are basically saying "We are having an event we can't afford so we are making you pay for part of it." I find the inability to host an event within one's means "sickening."

Eloping isn't bad! You are still married at the end of it all.

View Quoted Comment Just to reiterate for other couples who might be lurking and haven't found a venue yet, this is an important question to ask your venue, especially if you are budget conscious and want to have a bar. One of the first questions I asked the venues I was looking at was whether we could supply our own alcohol or if we had to use a bar package. I'm providing my own with a licensed bartender for a third or less of the cost of the equivalent bar package I was proposed. So think ahead.

View Quoted Comment What makes you entitled to a luxury item? I'm not being mean. I'm actually curious how you cognitively justify that you are entitled to something you cannot afford.

View Quoted Comment You are putting cash down on a photo booth but "can't" afford alcohol? I'm so confused...

View Quoted Comment So asking for advice is like taking a survey right? Getting a sample of opinions. Like when companies test their chocolate or booze or say the presidents success rate?? If the sample is bad, they toss out that batch because it’s indicitove of the rest. So when the majority of people say no it’s rude, that it’s a “bad batch” you’re gonna ignore that? You’d still eat a bad batch of candy? Fascinating