Bridesmaid Meeting

And if you make them have heels, you pay for them. And only if they are okay with wearing them. They might all actually be excited to match, but you don't make them pay for it if they cannot.

I hope you are paying for those shoes then!

Really? Your BMs are people not props, not dolls that you can dress up and pose.

Everybody is taking things the wrong way on here

My bridesmaids wore whatever shoes they wanted and were comfortable in. They had the option to get their hair done with me at the salon or do it themselves. Same with makeup. They got to do their nails however they wanted. They are my best friends and stood by my side on my wedding day and I asked basically nothing of them. It was perfect. My wedding wasn't compromised because they didn't fully match. I didn't lose my shit because they didn't perform "duties" or whatever. Hell, one of them was pregnant and then a new mom for my entire engagement. I wasn't about to bug her with wedding details and duties that were unnecessary.

Seriously, take your friends into consideration and chill the fuck out. Your entire planning process will go much smoother and your friends will thank you for it later.

No, we are taking it perfectly right. You type what you mean, and mean what you type. I've even quoted direct things you put on here. There is no other way to take it.

If we all are getting the same message it might be time for you to re-evaluate your ideas. That's not us taking it the wrong way. It's the honest truth blaring back at you.

Why aren't you getting that if everyone who didn't do a meeting then there would be no responses? Normal people don't have meetings for their brideslaves (excuse me maids) with to do lists

Marquita, we're trying to help you keep the friends that you have. Seriously, if you're going to be planning on requiring things, you need to pay for them. The only requirement a bridesmaid has is to buy their dress. That doesn't mean you require them to buy a $300 dress, you need to figure out their budget and go from there. But hair, nails, shoes... you don't get to dictate that unless you're buying it.

I wouldn't really give them a to-do list... It's perfectly okay to meet up and talk with them about the wedding and stuff and show them your ideas you had in mind for a dress.

I personally am paying for everything for my bridesmaids except makeup. They can do that one their own if they want to. Even our meetings I'm picking up the tab wherever we go out to eat at.

Well half of my bridesmaids won't be at the meeting cause they not here and I have already loaded them with all info and they are fine and wanting to be by my side for my wedding I have 12 bridesmaid and 7 that's have already said yes so y'all can gone bout your day

No. This is not a "You do You" thing.

We are trying to tell you to be nice to the people standing up for your wedding because they are doing you a favor by being there. Not the other way around. The only thing they have to do is buy the agreed upon dress (that is in their budget) and show up. That's it. No to do lists, no making them wear matchy-matchy heels if one of them likes flats. If this meeting is just to have them know each other, that's fine, but this sounds like a war-planning session with them as your little brides-soldiers and that's not cool.

Anyone want to take bets as to how many BMs are left by the day of her wedding?

Even your enemy will smile to your face. I wonder how long until the drama starts.

@gryffin, 2.... and they'll be either sisters or fsils lol

Please title the document: Terms & Conditions For Being My Slave

7 is not half of 12.

@Gryffin, I would take that bet except I have a feeling OP is one of those girls that will photoshop pictures to make it look like she had a ton of BMs. She'd also make excuses like "3 of them were in the bathroom and I didn't want to wait to take photos but I really had all 12! I swear!" So I'll just drink instead.

I had a gathering with my girls we had drink ate and discussed the dresses and made choices and decided on what prices worked for everybody. But I do have my girls in a group msg so we can all have convos even if we cnt meet... I will be having another gathering just to touch bases before the wedding and stuff like that and making sure they have everything they need anything they want to do and have flights and stuff booked !! To me it's whatever you choose. I'm not a specific bride but if you are just make you a list of important things so you will know what to talk about

Oh I got my girls jewelry and not specific about shoes or hair besides the hair pieces which I purchased but they are responsible for their nails and other things which all of mines agreed to. It's what you and your girls agree on!!!

When I was a bridesmaid last summer, the only "meeting" was when all the girls got together and helped paint bottles for centerpieces, separate flowers, etc... IF we wanted to help the bride see her DIY come together. But it was simply voluntary. Of course most BMs showed up because it was a fun get together, not a meeting. Then of course there was the night before the wedding when we all stayed the night and planned for set up. We weren't even all together when we chose dresses. I just personally think your idea of a meeting is a little too....uniform? Why can't you just text them? This is supposed to be fun, not a job!