Anyone else legitimately not care what other people want at your wedding?

@MisstoMrs - I love that "no pay, no say" and I'm totally going to use it with my family!

I have definitely been considering peoples opinions because I've never planned a wedding before but I'm keeping it affordable and being clear about what I want since we're paying for the whole thing ourselves. I think you kind of have to set the ground rules at the first incident so people don't just come in and try to take over. I have a very opinionated family and so I've just tried to be very clear about what it is that we want on our wedding.

Yeah, idgaf what anyone thinks, and i dont care if it makes me a bridezilla. The only two people who need tk be happy with the wedding are me and my FH, and he is one of those incredibly sweet "whatever makes you happy, makes me happy" men. So. Go for it girl! I know I am!

There are advantages to getting married in middle-age. We honestly do not GAF about what anyone wants for our wedding. We're footing the entire bill and we're doing it OUR way all the way.

I am so selfish when it comes to wedding planning, which is particularly difficult because A) FH takes an approach to wedding planning based solely on our guests' needs, and B) our guests are very poor, so their needs are severely limiting. We sometimes argue because I feel that he's placing their desires above mine, but things are working themselves out. At the end of the day, it's our wedding, and I really couldn't care less about incorporating their desires.

I don't care at all, and luckily both of our families have been SO amazing throughout this entire process. No one ever demands anything. They just give opinions when I ask. It has made this process so easy.

I already warned FH that I will be a Bridezilla if anyone tries to force their opinion on us. I am an older bride and it is a second marriage for both of us. What matters to us is the only thing that is important. I gave in a lot for my first wedding (marriage); this one is all ME! (oh and FH of course

Pshhh okaaaaay

@Amy - I was wondering if it was an age thing! Many of the younger brides seem more stressed about what their family wants. I don't know that I'd say I'm "middle aged" yet at 36, but I definitely give about 9000% fewer fucks that I did in my twenties! I would have been worried about E VER Y THING!

Omg I've been like this since DAY 1. It didn't help anyone else that my dad told me it's my right to. Gotta love being a daddy's girl!

@purplekitten - I think age might have something to do with it, in that older folks tend to be more in the boat of paying for the wedding themselves. When parents are paying, they legitimately have a lot of say in the planning process, and that typically happens with younger couples. Now, I know that there are tons of couples in their 20s - 30s who are footing the entire bill, so I don't want to sound all "look at me! I'm all mature!" I probably should have just said, "There are advantages to paying for the wedding yourself." Sometimes my fingers fly before I've thunk my thoughts through - lol

FH and I are only concerned with how we want the day to go! When my mom or FMIL give us a piece of advice, we definitely take it into consideration because they really don't throw out opinions unless we ask them. It's been pretty stress free for us.

Edited: I love the people that are writing "no pay, no say." I'll keep that in mind if someone makes an off demand for the wedding. At 22 and 23, FH and I are paying for our own entire wedding.

I was like you as well. There were a couple things I didn't really care about which way or what it looked like so I let others have an opinion. If I/DH was opinionated on a specific thing then it was presented as "DH and I have decided ____"

We did ask early on expectations and wishes etc and then pick and chose from the things our families wanted as long as we also liked those things as well. Our families were all really going though so I guess I can't really say that we even ran into a situation where it was a do or die.

I started off trying to appease people but it just got exhausting to the point of IDGAF and have learned to just flat out say no. Its so much simpler this way

That's all fine and dandy...until your parents are footing most of the bill and your in-laws gave you a tiny contribution (which they think buys them a lot more say than it does). I'm glad I'm doing this young because I love my FH, we've been together for 7 years, we are Christians so we won't live together until we are married, and we are ready. However, I wish we had enough money to foot the whole bill so we could say screw all of you.

I like this post, a lot. My FH seems to care a lot more about pleasing everyone else and I'm over here like "meh...whatevs, let's have the cupcakes we want, screw what everyone else likes"

@Nicole: Yeah, if anyone was helping me pay, I might feel differently.

My parents paid for my dress, which was very nice of them. That's my parents' only contribution, though. As for FH's family, his dad isn't contributing anything, and his mom can't handle her finances appropriately enough to pay for her plane ticket, so we bought it for her..... and for FH's younger brother, who is supposed to pay us back but refuses to look for a job.

I can honestly say that I legitimately didn't care much at all about anything related to the wedding. I wanted it to be nice and wanted good food and music. That was it. Was all about the marriage. Anyone expressing opinions besides my husband was politely thanked but treated as noise.

Yes. We are paying for this wedding ourselves and no one gets a say but us. About 3 months into planning, I sent my MOH a FB message with photo of a gorgeous cascading tiger lily bouquet someone local made for a Clemson themed wedding. I then told her the flowers were not real-all silk, and if I could find something realistic like that I might do silk bouquets.

Her response: "I don't want a silk bouquet, I absolutely want real flowers."

Well, that was the last time I even consulted with her about that subject, and I ordered her silk bouquet about 6 weeks ago and she doesn't even know, nor will she until she sees it.

@Monica SC I would have told my MOH that unless she wants to fork over the money for it then she get what i can afford

Me! The only advice/suggestion I took was from my aunt. I really wanted a beach wedding, she had one and told me she wouldn't recommend it to anyone for a lot of reasons. One being that goddamn sand fleas were jumping up her dress the whole time. I don't do well with bugs, so I decided against it.