Know that it's never to late to have the wedding you dreamed of as long as you have the right person (after your mate) to help you plan it.
When you're in the crunch of things remember that family and friends are often as nervous and excited as you are - the closer they are to you (emotionally) the more they embrace your feelings through out your joyous experience - so don't give them big responsibilities that you know would anger you if they are not carried out the way you invisioned.
Be detailed in your request to your wedding designer IT'S YOUR DAY so hold nothing back - that which seems impossible simply needs to be disected into obtainable portions in a timely manner to be see to fruition.
Yes, it's nice to try and do something so that everyone on both sides of your family are happy at the end of the day but remember - IT IS YOUR DAY - they are eating and drinking for free to be a part of your special day - it's your job to be happy their job to behave...therefore if you know there is a particular family member that may cause a disturbance or cause you to be uneasy - REMEMBER IT'S YOUR DAY - and make a wise decision upon the distribution of your invitations.