I have never been to a wedding with a cash bar or a dry wedding. I ever heard of either until I went on WW,. I’m 57 years old and have been to countless weddings, engagement parties, showers, milestone birthday and anniversary parties and never experienced either. I wouldn’t ever, in a million years, consider throwing a dry event or ask people to pay for drinks.
To address PPs comments: 1. There’s a big place between no alcohol and getting completely wasted. It’s called “responsible drinking.” 2. You don’t “need” alcohol to have a good time but it’s nice to have a cocktail or some wine at a festive event. 3. Yes, weddings ARE expensive. However, the last place to cut is on major things that affect guest experience. You can certainly offer “well” liquor over “premium,” wine and beer only, or a signature drink plus wine and beer, bring in your own alcohol (if allowed) to help with costs. If that’s still not affordable, cut your guest list and/or simply wait and save up. 4. You don’t have a dry wedding because you’re not a big drinker. If your guests aren’t “big drinkers” than pay on consumption, you’ll save money. The reception is for your guests. Are you not going to have music and dancing because you’re not really into dancing? Are you not going to have dessert for your guests because you’re on a diet? Are you not going to serve beef, chicken or fish for dinner because you’re a vegetarian? Yes, it’s that ridiculous.
I think a cash bar is worse. For A Dry wedding, maybe there is some religious or moral issue involved, for a cash bar--they obviously think booze is okay, just are too cheap to pay for it.
Master
October 2016
Mrs. Fall Bride ·
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That's like asking if you'd rather get shot in the leg or have acid poured on you. Both terrible choices.
There are *a lot* of reasons to have a dry wedding that aren't in any way inhospitable. A cash bar only (rather than the one one your venue snuck in while you're serving only beer and wine or certain labels) is always about money and shows bad management (too many guests, not figuring costs appropriately.)
A cash bar is FAR worse from an etiquette perspective and therefore more "rude". A dry wedding is NOT against etiquette. Sure they may be boring and guests may not enjoy attending them, but it is not rude of the hosts to not offer alcohol. It is up to the hosts to decide what to offer as far as food and beverages.
A cash bar, where you are offering alcohol but making guests pay, is definitely more rude. You should never offer what you aren't willing to pay for.
Honestly at my first wedding we had an open bar and some guests do not know their limit so i wish that wedding had been dry lol but also with a cash bar just make sure to let the guests know in advance and then they will also be more prone to keep their drinking under control and not get too wild on your dime since they will have to pay my FH an I are planning an open par with a 2 drink limit per guest then a cash bar after so they will be given drink voucher and once they use them they have to pay (our venue offered this)
Both are bad. Personally I think cash bar is ruder, as it's more cheap than disagreeing with it but I would prefer to have the option of buying a drink verses none at all.