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Amanda
Dedicated October 2020

Where's the support when you need it?

Amanda, on May 13, 2020 at 9:11 PM Posted in Family and Relationships 3 81
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Everyday someone else is asking if we will be postponing our October 24th wedding in North Carolina. Our venue and our wedding planner is very hopeful we will be able to have our day and all will end up the way we planned. However myself, my groom and 95% of our guests are from NY and would need to travel for the wedding. I hoped my bridal party would be supportive and understanding during this time but they have probably been more negative than anyone else. Constantly telling me we need to move our date and asking what we are waiting for. We still have time and we are trying to be hopeful. It's hard enough trying to have hope as it is. But anytime i try to talk to them or bounce ideas off of them i just get more negativity. Has anyone else been experiencing this from their bridal party?

81 Comments

  • V
    Master July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    I am sorry this is happening. I would recommend not talking to them about the wedding at this point. If they are only going to say negative things then it doesn't help discussing it with them. If anything it makes it worse.

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  • Monica
    Super October 2020
    Monica ·
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    Sorry you are experiencing that. My bridal party was very supportive and told me to just let them know what the plan is & they will be there. Thats really unfair that ur wedding is almost 6mo away and they are saying what are u waiting for. But i have gotten negative vibes from my family. Try to keep ur head up. Confide in ppl that DO support you and those that love will be there for you.
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  • Melle
    Legend June 2019
    Melle Online ·
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    I’m in a bridal party for a sept wedding and i NEVER said any of that to my bride. Because at the end of the day that’s their choice and that’s their date, but I think people are just genuinely concerned about the situation and they’re probably not thinking about your feelings. But you’re totally valid though because between now and then a lot can happen so holding out on hope makes a lot of sense
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  • Devoted June 2020
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    I’m sorry everyone is being so negative in the most happy and exciting time of your life. Personally, I planned most of my wedding alone and didn’t ask for many opinions because I’m pretty confident in what I want and what I like because I’ve envisioned this day my whole life. So, rather than letting them bring you down, just plan your little heart out. Follow wedding pages on Instagram for inspiration and excitement, find inspiration on Pinterest, talk to brides on this app....do whatever it takes to make your planning exciting and enjoyable. This is your time to shine, even though there’s a lot of bad crap happening right now, and everyone is freaking out (including us brides) there’s still a lot of positive outlets available to us.
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  • E
    Dedicated August 2020
    Elle ·
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    I'm so sorry you are experiencing such negativity. I've actually had a lot of people tell me, "I hope you keep your August wedding date!", so now I'll feel kind of bad if we do postpone! So many friends and family (at least the ones I've talked to) just want to see us tie the knot already and not wait any longer!

    I would suggest not talking to them about for now, if they're just going to be negative.... we don't want anymore things to bring us down.... this virus is doing enough! You can always bounce ideas off of us. Smiley smile

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  • Amanda
    Dedicated October 2020
    Amanda ·
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    Thank you so much! I appreciate it.
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  • Amanda
    Dedicated October 2020
    Amanda ·
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    Exactly i completely understand their worries in this uncertain time but I would just think if you have nothing nice to say than just don't say it. Who neededs more negativity right now? Ya know.
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  • Amanda
    Dedicated October 2020
    Amanda ·
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    Thank you. Yes i think at this point speaking to other brides who are in the same boat and can truly understand and are going through the same thing is probably the best option to stay sane through this!
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  • Belle
    Super July 2020
    Belle ·
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    I feel you. My closest family member turns out to say hurtful things as well. I am still optimistic for my destination July wedding with no guests, and I am buying all the necessary bridal stuff to make sure I have everything when the time comes. I am so happy I wanted to share with that person, but whenever I share an update, for example, I just picked up my dress... I was soooo happy, but words like “what??? Still thinking about it? You better cancel it!” just kills my happiness. I just want to share my happiness, but I just don’t and never get it, especially during this covid time. It just making me feel like “can’t I just have a happy wedding preparation and happy wedding?” I am not having a big fancy wedding, but at least I want to feel like a happy bride to be. Seems so hard these days.
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  • Amanda
    Dedicated October 2020
    Amanda ·
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    I am glad to hear your bridal party has had your back. I think we are all feeling negativity from one place or another during this crazy time. Thank you it's nice to have other people that understand on here!
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  • Amanda
    Dedicated October 2020
    Amanda ·
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    I agree. It's only making a bad situation worse at this point. Thank you!
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  • Amanda
    Dedicated October 2020
    Amanda ·
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    I couldn't agree more. It's almost as if it's a crime trying to be positive or make the best of what is going on. I am sorry your family member is not letting you have your moment. We all deserve our moment even with covid going on. No one and nothing should be able to do that.
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  • Belle
    Super July 2020
    Belle ·
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    Right? I am not a sensitive person. But the choice of words are just straight negative. I know they just worried for us, but at least think and choose the words wisely. It’s not hard to do, isn’t it?
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  • Amanda
    Dedicated October 2020
    Amanda ·
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    You would think it should be common sense. Unfortunately there doesn't seem to be a ton of that lately.
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  • Natalie
    Devoted April 2021
    Natalie ·
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    I’m so sorry you feel this way, they’re being completely insensitive to your feelings. It’s more than just the logistics of postponing all the vendors, it’s the DATE that really holds a place in our hearts - especially since by October, you should be fine to host your wedding! We were actually supposed to attend my FH’s best friend’s wedding last weekend, and they postponed to a Thursday night in September. The wedding is also out-of-state for us, and you know what? We’ve already updated our travel plans to the new date because we want to support them! Whatever it takes, we’re all in this together ❤️
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  • Amanda
    Dedicated October 2020
    Amanda ·
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    Thank you so much for your positivity. Yes exactly we all chose our dates for a personal reason and they mean a lot to us. They are lucky to have your support and hopefully they will do the same for you. Everyone should be supporting one another 🙏🖤
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  • Belle
    Super July 2020
    Belle ·
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    Well, I just take it this way: Covid has done so much damage economically and socially, people have to stay home, so many turned to moody and bitter people because of it. 🤷🏻‍♀️
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  • Amanda
    Dedicated October 2020
    Amanda ·
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    tenor.gif
    True. If they can't be happy then no one should be 🤷‍♀️
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  • Anna
    Rockstar June 2020
    Anna ·
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    Hey!
    June 6th Bride here, several of my very best friends, bridesmaids and My Matron of Honor, were the very ones to bring that topic up.

    I just decided, that I was going to lean on my faith, and be positive, because I truly felt it would be ok.
    I'm also a North Carolina Bride, we will be in phase two, possibly phase three, by my wedding, so October, should be even better, in my opinion.
    My guests know, if they are uncomfortable, and don't want to attend it's ok. We've only had 6 to decline on the RSVPS and one couple already had out of state plans, before the pandemic.
    I think I made the right choice by not jumping the gun, and waiting it out, I think you will too! I'm praying for you! Don't worry, we can't stop the world with fear, that isn't living. I say plan, enjoy yourself, because this time will go quick!

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  • Amanda
    Dedicated October 2020
    Amanda ·
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    That is so good to hear! I hope everything works out for you and your FH so you can have the day of your dreams. I agree you definitely have to be understanding if people aren't ready to be in larger groups yet. But if you only had a few no's that's super encouraging. Thank you so much keep you and all the 2020 brides in my prayers.
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