When does it become acceptable to fire a bridesmaid?

Have you tried to talk to her about these issues? I personally don't think its okay to fire her. You obviously asked her to be in your bridal party for a reason.

Wow.

5. She PURPOSEFULLY ordered her dress in the wrong color. I wanted a dark teal color, she ordered it in a light blue. She said it was "too dark for her skin tone, and this matched better" no, it doesn't at all lol

6. Plans changed once, location/date and she threw a MASSIVE fit. I mean, she told me she was "out, don't talk wedding to me again, etc" and it was only a week off the original date. Location changed to budget. She said she was kidding two days later...

I've stopped sharing details with her because she calls them stupid, or ugly, etc. I'm losing my mind. I'm not sure I even want her friendship anymore, but I don't know what's acceptable to do in this situation.

Yes, I've told her how awful she makes me feel sometimes, and she just laughs. She doesn't care.

Ummmm.....she's need fired!! She should be there to support you not bring you down. I'm sorry she doesn't see it that way.

Are you okay with losing her as a friend?

You're never supposed to kick someone out. Sit down face to face and tell her how you feel. Talk it out. It sounds like she is a pretty shitty friend though and if you're okay losing that 'friendship'...

If you don't want her as a BM anymore it will surely end your friendship as well. So if that's what you want...

She laughs when you tell her how you feel? Wow! So not a friend and should no longer be in the wedding.

I honestly think she wants you to fire her. It sounds like she hates everything about weddings and being a bridesmaid. Just save her the pain and fire her. She obviously doesn't want to do this anymore (maybe she never wanted to in the first place). If she is insulting you left and right she isn't a very good friend, not someone who supports you, but instead is cutting you down. So you don't have anything to lose by ending the friendship either.

I'm not being sarcastic and I'm not drunk.

ETA: You can always "fire" someone from your wedding party as long as you don't need the friendship. And you don't need bridesmaids or MOH. I am not having any and FH and I are stoked to have our closest friends and family come to our wedding as guests and just party with us. You really won't be losing anything and she might make your wedding less happy and fun by being in it.

I remember hearing about her ordering the wrong color dress. I can't believe she's still doing all this. I have no advice, I just feel bad you're still dealing with this. *hugs*

Well, first off, unless she filled out a W-2 and you're paying her wages, you can't fire her. She's not an employee.

However, if you don't even want her friendship any more, by all means kick her out of the bridal party. It's a guaranteed friendship ender, so you'll be set. It'll probably be the most awkward and horrible conversation of your life, but at least you'd be free of her toxicity.

Is she married? If not she is probably a jealous askhole.

Why are you friends with someone like this? Please don't be offended but, are you young? I weeded out anyone in my life like this about 10 years ago. I don't have time for that childish crap behavior from anyone. Kicking her out would ruin your friendship. Are you prepared for that?

On another note, if she wants to wear whatever she wants, she sounds like a guest to me.

I don't think there's anything wrong with asking a toxic person to politely step down. It's not as if you're asking her to go above and beyond for ridiculous duties. She is not being a supportive friend, be polite with her but tell her you feel that it would be best if she was not in the bridal party.

I actually went through something similar. I had an unsupportive, difficult bridesmaid. I sat down and talked with her and we mutually decided that it wasn't the right fit.

Bellamae, you might be thinking about someone else. More than one person has done this???

It seems like she has already excused herself as a bridesmaid. Beyond being a bridesmaid, is this someone that you want to continue a friendship with? ETA: Oh wow, so she laughs when you express her feelings? Again, I think you should focus on whether or not you want to continue this friendship. Has she always been this harsh, or is this something newly occurring?

How is this person even a bridesmaid?! I'm sure she had this attitude before she became one.

"A bridesmaid's only responsibility is to huh the right dress and show up on time, not drunk." Oops! Guess she can't walk, since she didn't get the right dress. That solves that issue.

How about just saying "if you don't want to be a bridesmaid in my wedding tell me and you won't have to and I won't be mad." Instead of "firing" her you give her the chance to opt out. Maybe she just wants to get out so she's doing all of this so give her the chance and this way you might salvage a friendship if any was there before..

Sit her down and say, "Ever since I asked you to be a bridesmaid, you have been incredibly abusive and difficult. You chose to overspend on a dress in the wrong color (which you will not be walking down the aisle in or standing beside me in if you do not correct the color issue,) and then had the gall to complain that it cost so much, even though you could have just as easily chosen a less expensive dress. You have belittled me, my dress, and my choices, which is degrading and abusive, and I will no longer tolerate these behaviors.

You have a choice. You can choose to adjust your attitude and fix the dress issue, or you can choose to walk away from our friendship. You have already done a massive amount of damage to it, and I will not be attempting to repair it if it continues after this point."

It doesn't kick her out, calls her out on her poor behavior and choices, and gives her the option to start acting like a human being or walk, which relieves you of someone toxic.

I don't normally advocate kicking out a bridesmaid (and really, I'm not here, either,) but nobody should feel obligated to put up with abusive behavior.