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Kristyn
Just Said Yes November 2012

Wedding officiant script

Kristyn, on October 8, 2012 at 5:39 PM Posted in Planning 0 48

Hi! Our friend got his ordained ministers' license to marry us (he's never done this before!), but now we have no idea what he's supposed to say! We're not having a very formal/traditional wedding, and we're not getting married in a church so we don't want it to be super boring like that (totally not us!) Anyway, I was wondering if you guys had any ideas or knew of a website that could help us out with this? I'm getting together with our friend soon to go over what he's going to say so I need some ideas for him! I appreciate any kind of suggestions. Thanks!!!!!

48 Comments

Latest activity by Don, on March 13, 2015 at 9:02 AM
  • Michele, my Belle
    Super December 2012
    Michele, my Belle ·
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    No offense, but if your friend was licensed as an ordained minister, with the authority to marry people, I would like to think that the licensing organization would have instructed him in the acceptable way in which to do that. i.e. his responsibilities as a marriage officiant.

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  • Sunshine & Sprinkles
    Expert August 2013
    Sunshine & Sprinkles ·
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    No help here, but I agreed with Michele.

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  • Terri
    VIP August 2013
    Terri ·
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    I agree,,,he should have been given samples or something in his training....but here are a couple sites that may help.

    http://www.bestweddingguide.org/wedding-officiant-script/

    http://www.angelfire.com/id/vancuren/wedscript.html

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  • Nancy Taussig
    Nancy Taussig ·
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    Make sure he breaks up your vows. When I co-officiated with a brand new minister, she rattled off the whole vow and expected the groom to repeat it. He had the deer in the headlights look. Then she did the same thing to the bride!

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  • Celia Milton
    Celia Milton ·
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    Not to sound mean, but this is why people hire pros; not just for officiating, but for flowers, music, photography. Your ceremony is the first part of the day; it's important, it should be meaningful and entertaining, and it needs to be legal.

    Without some creativity and talent on his part, yes, you can all collectively cut and paste and it'll sound just like.....everyone else's ceremony. I suspect that's not what you want.

    I would have him call your town of county or whoever grants marriage licenses, find out what HAS to be said, and then together you can write around those parts.

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  • Leanna T.
    VIP March 2013
    Leanna T. ·
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    To the people saying that the certifying organization should have trained him... there are some websites now where anyone and their grandmother can get ordained. It's not very formal.

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  • Michele, my Belle
    Super December 2012
    Michele, my Belle ·
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    Leanna, that was my point. I guess he just gave them his credit card # and they sent him a nice little certificate/license.

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  • Stefanie
    Devoted August 2013
    Stefanie ·
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    We are doing the same thing and I've created my own ceremony based on a bit of Googling, some personal ideas, and tradition. We are not religious by any stretch of the imagination so our reading is secular. We have the opening (the officiant is a great speaker and will do his own intro approved by us), the reading, the vows, the rings, the kiss. That's it. Ten minutes in and out.

    In my state, anyone can marry people as long as those people agree that he is appropriate to do so. We aren't stressing the "What should he say?" aspect because in the end, it's a formality.

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  • Celia Milton
    Celia Milton ·
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    No online 'certifying' organization is going to train anyone who goes to them to get "legal".

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  • Patrick
    Dedicated September 2012
    Patrick ·
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    Kristyn, our ceremony was nontraditional - it was entirely nonsectarian, set outdoors, and featured two songs on the ukulele and a little Irish flair. If you'd like to see the "script", PM me.

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  • Mrs. Clark aka Mrs Awesomepants
    Master November 2011
    Mrs. Clark aka Mrs Awesomepants ·
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    I hope you'll update your avatar (the rings) to a unique picture so we can remember you and help you more in the future. This post tells you how to do that and more about the forums: https://www.weddingwire.com/wedding-forums/new-to-the-weddingwire-forums-please-read-before-you-post/b433c40c1a62b96a.html

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  • Jamie Q.
    Master May 2013
    Jamie Q. ·
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    Yea, wouldnt they give him something? There are plenty of things out there for guidelines though if you just google it. In fact, when we were searching for officiants, many of their pages had sample ceremonies on them. Just make sure your friend really is "legal". our officiant informed us that some states have rules regarding who can and cannot marry people and some ban those ordained online.

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  • Kristen
    Master September 2012
    Kristen ·
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    Kristyn, you can pm me too if you would like to see our ceremony script. We had a friend officiate our ceremony as well, and it went wonderfully. Obviously each individual needs to decide what's best for them, but we wanted a person we knew to marry us, and it worked out great for us. Our ceremony was personal, short, informal, exactly what we wanted, and I was glad that it was our friend there sharing the memory with us instead of someone we will likely never see again.

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  • Jasmine & Allan
    Just Said Yes May 2013
    Jasmine & Allan ·
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    Kristyn, we can help each other. I wanted my brothers involved in our wedding. My older brother will be performing the ceremony. The wedding is in May 2013, so we are still working on the script.

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  • Kristyn
    Just Said Yes November 2012
    Kristyn ·
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    Thanks everyone for your help and advice! He did get a book I guess, but being a control freak I would rather just write everything myself, so its more personal and at least then I'll know its done right! Lol. I've been finding a lot of good ideas and resources on the internet as well. He is legal to marry us (we double-checked) and it means so much to us that our good friend will be doing the honor. Thank you again everyone!

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  • Mrs.V-Finally
    Super August 2013
    Mrs.V-Finally ·
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    We are going to do the same thing. Here in MA you can get a license for the day. They don't give you a guide on what to say, just tips around the web.

    I will keep an eye on this thread and see what you all come up with. Smiley smile

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  • Jen P.
    Master January 2012
    Jen P. ·
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    Don't forget to look up his duties within your state/county! Smiley smile There's more to it than just the ceremony...

    I did get help with my script from these lovely ladies and ended up with a beautiful, unique ceremony.. Love the helpful ladies here. Smiley smile

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  • Anonymous
    VIP October 2012
    Anonymous ·
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    They don't need to give him anything to my knowledge. Honestly, we had a friend that was ordained that did our ceremony and it was absolutely beautiful! Just google ceremony scripts. We did the opening of the ceremony, a poem (a friend read), our vows, exchange of rings, the hand ceremony and then he pronounced us husband and wife. honestly, i wouldn't change it for a second! Let me know if you have any questions!

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  • Kayla P. (Kayla S.)
    Super September 2012
    Kayla P. (Kayla S.) ·
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    I did research and wrote our ceremony, knighting ceremony and wrote a script on a scroll sin e it was very different.t wording

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  • Nancy Taussig
    Nancy Taussig ·
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    Make sure he knows what to do with the license.

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