Unpopular Opinion

View Quoted Comment If you bring up dry weddings at all on here, I feel like people attack you. Every wedding I have attended was a dry wedding and they were all fun. I am having a dry wedding, as the venue is in a dry county. It is not a deal-breaker for me and if the guests want to go to the bar after, that is fine with me.

View Quoted Comment Yeah, this thread is hard for me to really articulate. On one hand, everyone is entitled to an opinion and a preference. On the other hand this has built up a lot of negativity and judgement alongside those opinions and it's not exactly harmless. There's some valid thoughts on treating people who you love with care and providing basic comfort and food but then there's some real distain towards some choices that can be hurtful to a bride choosing to do that same thing.

I see so many brides worrying about being tacky and it actually breaks my heart. I had such a difficult time worrying what others would think and it really, truly stained my planning experience.

Your wedding will be full of love and people who support you. Don't let online opinions get you down.

My biggest one is people saying you *have* to do this or that. So many wedding traditions seem to be big wastes of time, energy, and money. I think couples should celebrate the way they want to, but nothing is mandatory. That includes what you wear, serve, or call the celebration. If you eloped or didn't have the time/money to celebrate with friends and family until later, I think it's fine to wear a real wedding dress and call it your wedding. If you don't have the budget for fancy food or drinks, I'm still happy to celebrate with you and am honored you invited me.

As a guest, my biggest pet peeve is having no where to sit at any point of the event (I'm have a disability that makes this painful, but it's uncomfortable for every one). Parking is another big one. Don't make guests hunt for spots or have to walk super far and worry they'll be late. I've also been to outdoor weddings with lots of bugs (flies buzzing around the food and one with bees 😨) or that are way too hot or cold and that's all I remember about the day, even if it was a good wedding otherwise.

Personally, I don't like first looks (either before the wedding or while walking down the aisle) because I feel like that "special moment" is too forced and there's too much pressure to have the right expression on your face for the pictures. I showed my fiancé pictures of wedding dresses I'd tried on to help me decide. I'm both bad at and don't want to keep secrets from him. To each their own!

I am reading all of these and thinking the same thing! Who cares! People will have a wedding the way they would like to have it...(insert face palm here)

View Quoted Comment

THANK YOU!! I agree on the guest gift...and I know that is extremely unpopular...and I will never expect a gift and if I don't get one...I am not going to hunt them down and belittle them. I have always been taught that as a guest, you give a gift. As you said, whatever amount you can afford to give them. Marriages *are usually* a once in a lifetime thing and historically, its an event where gifts should be given. It baffles me that people attend weddings without giving a gift to the new couple, personally I would never go without a gift or card in hand. That is just me though.

View Quoted Comment I was actually in a wedding that was hours behind on timing because mob got into an accident on the way there. Then speeches came (which was while we were eating but waiting for dancing to start) there was 7 of us but only the moh and bm were “allowed” speeches which was fine with me. Except then almost every family member felt the need to grab the mic and tell some “funny” story. Roughly 80 people. I was ready to gouge my eyes out with my dinner fork. First dances came then they cut cake and almost everyone just left. I’m pretty sure they could use wedding speeches as a form of torture

Nope:

- First looks: what's the point of walking down the aisle?

- Bouquet/garter toss: grandma doesn't need to see all that.

- Money dance: rude and money hungry

- Choreographed dances: ughhhhh!

- Photo booths: half the time they don't work

- Cupcakes or dessert bars: so messy!

- Playing pranks when it comes to the rings: really!?

- Menus, programs, escort cards, favors: a giant waste of time and money

- Honeymoon funds: do I get to come with you?

- Send offs: who's going to clean all this up? How come you get to leave but I need to stay here and burn my hand with this stupid sparkler?

- RUSTIC!!!

Fight me lol.

I hate the whole "first look" thing. I don't want to take that moment of him seeing me for the first time in my gown walking up to aisle to him. He wants that.

I hate a cash bar. It's beyond tacky. If you can't afford booze that's fine, you can have a dry wedding, or go with wine, beer and soda. Some places also throw in house liquor.

The Bouquet toss: I definitely won’t be doing it at my wedding because I really don’t care for it or see the point in it. But I don’t mind when other people do it

Wedding cake: I hate wedding cakes! I’ll have a 2 layer cake and then cup cakes for everyone else. I don’t really see the big deal in cupcakes if they taste great!

Kids at the reception: I personally do not want kids running around at my wedding when I’m trying to dance, or knocking things over... Plus my fiancé already has a big family as is so bringing everyone kids would be a lot of money &’ we’re paying for it ourselves unless people want to contribute to the wedding so their kids can come NO KIDS.

Oh and last but no least!!! People telling me what I should and shouldn’t do with my wedding!!! Or asking if the wedding is still happening that’s disrespectful!!!

View Quoted Comment

Clinking glasses!!! I first saw that at my cousin's wedding. Their friends kept clinking their glasses all night. I felt bad for my cousin...

Here are my unpopular opinions:

1) I hate uneven wedding parties and I have no issue with asking someone to be a replacement if someone drops out. I think there’s a proper way to do it and if you do it that way, no one will feel offended

2) I think asking for cash is identical to having a gift registry and I see no issue with either

3) hate garter toss/bouquet toss but that seems to be more of a popular opinion nowadays

4) my bridesmaids can get over it if they don’t love the dresses. I would never ask them to wear something they’re uncomfortable in (ex: super tight on a curvy body or low cut on large bust, etc - those types of things) or pay a lot of money (I think a dress should not be anymore than $150 and that’s on the high end) but if the BMs don’t love the color of exact style - they can get over it.

5) I do not want to greet every single guest. I will do my best but I am paying loads of money for this wedding and I want to enjoy the food & drinks & dancing with my new husband - not bouncing around talking to people I hardly know and having the same conversation 75 times.

6) I see absolutely no issue with having a gap between wedding & ceremony so long as there are ample bars/restaurants/etc nearby.

7) I have absolutely no issue saying “no kids” on the invitation and I also have no problem inviting some kids but not all...some kids I have a relationship with, some I don’t. That one really bothers me when people get mad their kids can’t come.

8) there’s a balancing act between accommodating guests and bending over backwards to please every single person’s little desires.

9) if you are not contributing to the wedding financially - you have absolutely no say in anything that happens. If you are contributing - I will take opinions but you still have no say. I don’t want money with strings attached and if there are, I’m not accepting the money. I also don’t want random parents’ friends who I have never ever met at my wedding.

10) if a guest is in a relationship, under no circumstances should their partner not be invited. I would never ever attend a wedding that my FH was not invited to - I would never respect or celebrate someone else’s relationship while they are disrespecting mine.

Hahahaha man this post got me heated! 😂

View Quoted Comment

Agreed. This was a fun post and I enjoyed reading everyone's different opinions, even those that "trashed" some of my own approaches. I'm guilty of planning my wedding in a way that doesn't appeal to another bride on here. And I know some of my opinions are not others' tastes, hence why it's called an unpopular opinion! But I've got plenty of unpopular opinions, so I also apologize if anything I posted had offended the pp.

View Quoted Comment We are cleaning up what we are responsible for before send off. Then just giving the bags to someone that is meeting us at the bar after. So all they have to do is carry bags to their car.

View Quoted Comment Hey at least you were out and about with them. These brides literally didnt do anything. They sat on their stage drinking for 2 hours and only played slow music. It was awful.
I also dont understand the whole money dance thing.

1) Garter and bouquet toss are ridiculous and tacky.

2) Requiring guests to pay for anything. Your reception is a thank you so don't be so cheap and have an open bar even if it's just beer and wine, not sure what a money dance is and I'm glad I've never seen one.

3) Kids at the reception anywhere adults are drinking I don't think kids should be involved. You wouldn't bring your children to a bar which is pretty similar to a reception once dinner is finished.

4) Not enough food I don't care if you have plated or buffet just make sure there's plenty of food for everyone.

5) This one will be super unpopular but it's how I feel. I hate the dances your first dance, mother son, father daughter they are literally so boring to watch as a guest I use this chance to go to the washroom. I don't care to sit and watch other people dance.

6) Too many speeches are boring I think the BM, MOH, Bride and Groom are more than enough and if the parents have a short one fine but I think hearing from 4 people is plenty.

7) First looks, why ruin the moment?

8) Having 2 dresses. Like why are you seriously that deprived of attention you can't just wear one dress?

9) I don't think everyone needs a plus one unless they are in a serious relationship I don't want your weird date that I don't know coming sorry.

10) Too many slow song!

11) Uneven bridal parties and having men in the bridal party or women as a "groomswomen" it's weird and looks ridiculous.

Whew. This post is very intense. I think it’s important to take all these forums, and any articles on weddings that you see, with a grain of salt. No matter what anyone else thinks or feels, it’s your day and you should do what’s best for you and your guests. A forum can’t know what’s right for your guests, in your culture, in your community, etc.

View Quoted Comment THIS!!!! I’m very opinionated on my stuff but if I’m being completely honest, I feel super defensive about almost all of my wedding decisions because of forums on here. I love wedding wire but I feel like there are so many people that are like “you HAVE to do this” or “you can NEVER do that” so I feel like I have to defend every single little decision I make. I really appreciate your comment because it’s so true.

View Quoted Comment I don’t mind honeyfunds either, I didn’t have one but I couldn’t care less if another couple had one, but I don’t think you understand how they work .. when a homeyfund breaks down certain things like excursions and you donate to it thinking you bought the couple a snorkel excursion in reality, you didn’t. What you did was give them the amount it will cost them to book the excursion.. but the money goes into an account and the couple can use it however they want .: just becuase you are lead to believe you paid for them to snorkel doesn’t actually mean they have to snorkel... so basically the two honeyfunds you described are the same

View Quoted Comment

No I understand, I am aware it just goes into a bank account. We registered for a few "excursions" and 100% plan to use the money for those purposes only, and to include a photo of us doing whatever it was, in our thank you card to the person who got it for us. I get that the couple could just take the money and do something else with it but I would hope they would be honest with it! And if not, honestly, who cares? Theoretically they could return the appliance you bought them and do something else with the money too. And why would they bother registering for honeymoon activities that they didn't intend to do? Idk as a guest I fee like if you're spending money on a gift for someone you cannot control what they do with that gift or with that money, so I don't see how it matters

View Quoted Comment I mean some people May care because it’s tricking someone into thinking they are doing something for the couple.. like I said I don’t really care about honeyfunds but I know if I have someone $$ thinking I bought them an excursion and they don’t even do it I’d orobably turned off to the couple lol, but I respect the way you’re going about it with sending pictures- that’s a cute touch !

also- if you return something off your registry you’d more then likely get store credit .. I’d be okay w an item being returned and the couple buying something else they need