Traditional Sit Down Dinner or Heavy Hors d'oeuvre?

I think it depends on the group. My FH family is Russian and a lot of them don't speak English well (or at all) so they probably would just stick together anyways and not mingle. And to be honest its the same with my family, my Mom's side has never met my Dad's side so I think it would just be awkward all around.

I put a lot of thought into who is at what table so I know that everyone will have a good time and have great conversations.

But if you have a group that would get along well I think hors d'oeuvre heavy would be more fun.

We're doing a traditional sit down meal but we're not paying too much for each guest ($19.22 with tax & gratuity included) so I'm not too worried if they don't eat a ton of food. Its their own fault LOL

What is Heavy Hors d'oeuvre?

We did 3 stations and a lot of heavy, passed hors d'oeuvres this past weekend for our home town reception, and it was a big hit. DH's uncle said he was thrilled not to have to sit the whole time. Everyone mingled because they had to move around the room to get to the different food stations. We did have quite a bit of seating (bar/cocktail type tables), so people could sit if they wanted to.

I am a BIG fan of letting people choose the things they like best.

@ Princess, Hors d'oeuvres are the fancy name for appetizers ! If I do the hors d'oeuvres, seating won't be an issue, the ballroom for reception is where the ceremony will be, everyone will have a seat.

I'm doing the buffet stations with 3 different entrees plus other stuff. I want my guests to have a few options to choose from.

I can't do the stations of heavey hors d'oeuvres....I have 170+ guests...too much chaos to eat...

Yardiegirl, FWIW, we had about 125 and it worked out wonderfully. In some ways it was easier because everyone was eating - whether a passed hors d'oeuvres or something from a station - at the same time. I've been to large seated dinner weddings where one end of the room finished all their courses before the other end got their first.

I think it's just a matter of preference.

I also think it is a matter of preference, the time of day of your wedding and the number of guests. As someone pointed out, if you have 200 guests, it could get a little chaotic.

If I attend a wedding, I prefer the standard cocktail hour with appies and a meal. We had stationary appies: Veggie Crudite, Cheese/Fruit Display and an Anti-Pasto.

My daughter is having a combo of passed horsies and stations and then the meal.

If you did a combo of passed, stationary and stations, with plenty of seating, it could work, but I think if it is at a meal time, you need to go seriously heavy. The stations would also make it appear as though you were having a meal.

Good luck.

We were torn about this... we decided to go with the sit down dinner just because there was seating for those that wanted it... Which I'm glad we went that route because the wedding party next to us (there were two weddings at the restaurant) had a buffet dinner instead of sit down and the guests completely took over the balcony (which sucked for us because it was shared and felt akward going out there because it was like the record scratched anytime we stepped outside)... the funny thing though was that since our room had windows to the balcony... you could see the guests looking into our wedding longingly lol

If you to hors d'oeuvres, make sure it's not during meal time.

We did this- passed hors d'oeuvres plus a pasta station, then cake and ice cream sundae station (started at 3pm). It was wonderful and exactly what we wanted, our guests had a great time and left full. There was plenty of seating- a mix between table with chairs, couches/armchairs, and standing cocktail tables.

I will say this- I did not save money doing it this way. My reception was at least as expensive as having a meal, so if you're considering it, don't take "a sit down dinner is a waste of money" into consideration.

I just don't want the lines at the stations or the buffet with all those people. We have a cocktail hour where food will be passed around by the wait staff but for the actual dinner, I'd rather have all those people sit and eat. Plus, just as Kerri F. said...the stations and the sit down dinner were the SAME cost. I'd rather not have the chaos.

If it's an issue of cost I found out it depends where you are located and venue/caterer. In researching I was quoted higher prices for buffets than seated and vice versa. Personally we are having a cocktail hour with passed h'orderves and stationed fruit tray, vegie tray and something I can't remember at the moment. Followed but a pasta station, carving station and fajita station. We're having approx 75 guest so long line shouldn't be an issue and everyone will have a seat.

I think if you wanted to do stations and passed hors d'oeuvres for 170 people, you just have to make sure you have enough. For 125 people, 3 (fairly large) stations and passed hors d'oeuvres was plenty. For 170 people, you would need more stations (and more space) so that people wouldn't be waiting a long time. Maybe 5 stations and more servers than we had.

Again, it's a matter of preference, timing (although I would totally have done this for dinner hour, too), and planning/scaling. In our area, this was 1/2 the price, at least 3x the food, and the quality of the food was 10x better than any plated dinner we were offered. Everyone raved about the food and had a great time. I recommend it because it worked out so fabulously for us, but of course it is only one option.

Yeah I also read that the cocktail reception (that's what its called) isn't really always the best way to go - it could be just as expensive depending on how many people you have. Plus you would definitely have to make sure you have enough seats...I forgot who it was but I know it was on here and someone mentioned that they went to one and there wasn't enough seats available and people had to stand which is never good