Sigh. Why are strip clubs even a thing .. :(

No one can make him do what he doesn't want to do. And he shouldn't go if he know it makes you nuts. It just signals a lack of respect, by both him and his guys.

I agree . He just doesn't see it cos he cares so little about strip clubs . I'm like then why is this even a thing ? He's like "idk cos it's not that big of a deal" sigh . How have other girls dealt with this :-/

If you are that uncomfortable you should relay that to him and he should relay that information to his groomsmen. Nobody can make him do anything he doesn't want to.

Look at page two to see a current thread on this topic.

As far as how I'd deal, strip clubs don't bother me

He wont touch them if he thinks they are nasty. My fiancé doesnt even want to have one. But I'm good with it either way. They aren't going home with him.

Actual contact is a huge no no in most clubs. Touching a dancer during a lap dance will get you thrown out in most reputable places. Champagne room is another story. Not that that helps, just sayin' that most guys just look.

Because*

I am sorry you are having a hard time dealing with this. Have there been trust issues in the past? Do you have issues with your self esteem. I myself am not a jealous person. FH has never been to a strip club and I told my guy friends to take him and get him a couple of lap dances. Is the issue just with strippers? What about magazines and porn?

I don't necessarily think it's a trust thing...it's more an *ewww* thing

FH and I actually used to go to them together in college with other groups of our friends. Like PP have said, it's really not all that. I went to a male one for SILs bachelorette... a little weird but it was actually very entertaining. The guys put on little mini shows with "storylines" and everything. If it makes you that uncomfortable, just communicate that clearly to him. But if it's not a deal breaker for you and he wants to or doesn't mind going, I wouldn't think too hard about it. If you have never been to one it's hard to see how it really is more entertaining than anything.

Well I've gone to strip clubs and it's really not a big deal. It's a bar with naked women. You can choose to watch or just hang out and drink. Strippers aren't going to give lap dances to everyone either, they usually ask before hand. They're expecting money so if you're not willing to pay they will leave you alone

I think I'm in the minority here- I have zero issues with FH going to the strip club. I've even gone with him and it just doesn't bother me. I know he's coming home with me. I also know that if I told him I wasn't okay with it, he'd make every effort to not go. I don't think he should go for his bachelor party if he doesn't even want to.. the point is to have a great time, and if he won't enjoy himself there, why would his friends insist?

If it is such a big deal to you, you need to communicate this to your FH and he needs to respect you enough to figure out something else to do for his bachelor party.

Oh it will be fine. I really didn't want my husband to go either but I didn't make it a rule for him not to go. Not so much go like ever but go for his bachelor party because that meant he would get all the attention and I really didn't want him to get a lap dance but obviously I knew it would happen if it was his party. Anyways he went.... he got a lap dance... I cried because I am dramatic but I was over it in a hour and haven't thought about it since. He didn't go in a back room....he didn't cheat on me... he told me the very next morning. Its now a joke. That was the first and only time since that he has ever been.

We are doing ours together. The girls and the guys will go separately and do something for the day then meet up in the evening and all go to a bar where we will have a reserved table then stay in a block of rooms we have reserved. Not because of lack of trust but because we all enjoy being together anyways so why not all have an awesome night together... strip clubs were not ok with me either (he doesn't like them anyways) so we were on the same page from the get-go. Wishing u the best and hopefully they won't end up going!

The way I see it if it makes me uncomfortable, and him uncomfortable- his friends should respect that. If not, they really aren't that great of friends. I'd be furious if FH went, one because he doesn't drink and I feel like strip clubs are places where you get wasted and throw dollars with your friends, not sit around sober like a creeper. That's weird.

@alwaysms I'm not sure what area you're in but here in DFW he's been to about 4 of them in the past . He says they come and sit on your lab and let you touch them. He's never been to a place where it's frowned upon. At the full nude places he's actually seen girls and guys ... you know....

@erinwood - yeah I'm pretty insecure . I understand that's my issue on this , and we're doing pre marital counseling I wonder if this is something to bring up - as awkward as it may be

I think the issue here is more about lack of respect. If he knows it bothers you, he shouldn't go.

But strip clubs aren't that bad. I mean some are sleazy. But most you can't touch and only look. Guys go because they like the female body not because they want to fall in love with a stripper. He probably sees half as much boob on a daily basis walking down the street!