Secret reception location

@Harmonie Maybe say something like 'reception location to be announced?' I've never seen an invite like that, but I would automatically be intrigued!

Celia milton...we are marrying who we love. Didn't think I had to lay my whole life out there to have people not be rude. That's all. Common decency I guess is gone. Also, first time having, planning or part of wedding and doing it all on our own, so...I just wanted some feedback and I got it. Thanks!!!

@mrs. fall bride-totally get it! And from now on i will know that. first time on wedding wire. Thanks!

People are so judgey - you're all on here looking for advice and help, why be rude to someone trying to do the same?I see it SO much on here but this is ridiculous.

Harmonie, i would maybe put on the invitation "ceremony will be held at 123 1st street, blah, blah , reception location To be announced"

hope that is somewhat helpful and congrats !

Harmonie,

I just want to ensure I understand. So you're saying some won't support the ceremony, but they would be okay coming to the reception?

So you're planning on sending invitations out to both events separately? My question is, do you think it need to be a secret? The people that do know the location (and don't support your union) won't come and cause problems will they?

In my opinion, if no problems will be caused, the location can be disclosed because those that truly want to be there will attend both!

Oh JFC with the pity party. Why is there not a secret location to that so I could skip it???

ETA It's awful people don't support your wedding. Love is love and should be celebrated. But you can't blame us for having fun with cryptic posts and also assuming this was like every other "We only want to invite certain people to certain events" post.

You didn't have to 'lay your whole life out there", and there is plenty of common decency, support and love here, but ambiguous posts don't usually garner those responses.

You're among friends here (well, unless you're doing a cash bar, dry wedding, have a giant gap or making your BP wear weird shit).

Post full frontal and you'll get support, love and advice.

@Lillybean 17 no pity party here...just asking about advice on an invite. and you don't have to respond hon.

@elphaba Bc then it leaves the choice to be assholes up to them. We are inviting people we love and want to be there. It's up to them to show. They have told us straight out they will not come to ceremony but will come to reception. Obviously, bc I stated that, we do NOT want that. We aren't picking and choosing who gets to come to which. We are inviting 200 people to ceremony and if they want to support us then those 200 people are invited to reception. That's it. Doesn't make sense to you, that's fine. It makes sense to us. I am just asking for ideas on verbiage of the invite.

I'm new here too. Better to read, then post cause digital fire and brimstone fall from the e-heavens if you ask either a) an unconventional question or b) ask a question that goes against ww norms.

Lmao "hon" that's not how the internet works.

And I didn't mean your pity party because you have unsupportive family, I meant it toward how you reacted to our replies not being what you wanted. This isn't vaguebook. We will take something and run with it like others have explained.

If you didn't want to hear any and all replies, you shouldn't have posted.

@Harmonie I sympathize with this issue and I am sorry you are going through it. I think having DOC or security turn them away (as a PP suggested) is a better option than the "secret location" though

@lillybean17 didn't realize that is how it went on weddingwire. that's all. I get it. I am not daft. Thanks though for all the info!!! @cheryl yea totally should have done that for sure! Thanks!

Not sure what I would do in this situation. My FW and I have a couple people that have stated their beliefs. Her sister said she will not attend. We still plan on sending invites to all the people on our list, including ones who've stated they won't come.

It blows that people can't just love and support you no matter who you marry.

How are you going to remember which of your 200 guests attended the ceremony? I'm assuming once people know the reception location they will text the others?

@jacks good point. we thought of that too. still in the works...it sounds a lot more complicated then it is! haha but thanks for the feedback!

Hi Harmonie! Have you considered just not inviting those family members who do not support you? You are under no obligation to invite them to your wedding and you don't even have to give them the opportunity "to be assholes"!

@elphaba Thanks for the info again! @Mrs. Fall Bride....thanks! I get it now though! I read through some others posts....should have done my research! I posted before work and was reacting at my lunch! Now I know!! haha

@lissyloo @OHP @WWLynnie we have considered it all. We want to be loving and kind and allow them to see their way out of our lives. We have opened the door. It is on them. That's all! NOTES TAKEN!!! THANKS SO MUCH! I AM NOT being a ninja or disappearing just heading back to work!!! hahaha!

OP this is an honest question and I am not trying to be snarky - why are you inviting these people to anything at all? What is confusing to me is that you're willing to pay for all of these people to come party even though they don't support your union to the point that they refuse to come to the ceremony. I wouldn't invite anyone who flat out told me they wouldn't support my marriage but still expected an invitation to the party celebrating my marriage. You don't get one without the other.

Otherwise, I'm honestly not sure how I'd word your invitations, sorry.