Secret reception location

"To all saying just don't invite them...it's not that simple when it's close family. And, respectfully, you know I love you all, but most of you don't understand exactly what it feels like to be rejected by your family because of who you are, and the emotional minefield it is to navigate. "

Thank you, Richard! This exactly.

LilyBean get a grip. The OP is not having a "pity party" because of her unsupportive family and the fact that you even said that is offensive AF.

Congrats on your wedding!! Hate it was such a rough intro but glad you're still here! I agree with PP about "reception to follow at close location, transportation provided". I respect the fact that you're still inviting people who aren't being so nice about your relationship. Hopefully they come around and realize love is all it's about. I wish you the best and happy planning!!

Just saying- I kind of love the idea of a surprise reception! I think it's fun!

But maybe give the guests an idea of what to expect for the type of reception it will be. Example: an invite that says "Country hoe down to follow" versus "Formal reception to follow," would immediately determine what I was going to wear and how I would behave. But you don't have to get more specific than that.

Whyyyyyyyy???? Please just make things easier on your guests and disclose the location.

Two thumbs up to Richard and PrettyWitty&Gay.

My wife and I were married four years ago - one week before our same sex marriage was legally recognized by the federal govt and one year before it became legally recognized in our state. When we told my future MIL and FIL, they were less than enthusiastic. Over the course of our engagement, we visited with them and shared details of the plans with them as best we could. To their credit , even with their concerns and hesitations they never were rude or threatening in any way. Both chose to come to the destination wedding and acted respectfully...even walking their daughter down the aisle. (albeit MIL never mentioned the wedding to anyone and rather told her boss and others she needed time off for a vacation in a different state than the one we were being married in) I can't say it was all easy going, but over time they became more comfortable and accepting of our marriage because I believe they began to see our relationship as less "same-sex" and more as simply two people who love and care for each other. Now four years later my MIL is one of our biggest supporters and a supporter of LGBT rights in general. To this day my FIL, won't publicly acknowledge our wedding and instead introduces me in public as "her friend" (he's fine when it's just family but his misguided sense of pride won't allow for a public acknowledgement - his problem not ours) We are glad that back then we kept the door open and allowed them to make the decision to either hold on to their ignorance or take the first steps towards letting go, becoming educated, and maybe eventually acceptance. Just as we didn't want to be treated any differently than any other engaged couple, we didn't want to treat them differently than any other guest.

(Caveat - If we would have had any reason to think they would cause a scene or in anyway disrupt the wedding, an invitation for that day would not have been extended,)

Wishing you both a marriage filled with lots of love and happiness!

As someone whose family member got married in a same sex marriage and i (nor my mom or sister) weren't invited to any of it because they chose to invite no family versus deal with another side of my family that was unsupportive I actually really like your approach. It has always made me sad I missed my aunt's wedding (they have been together as long as I can remember) but I also understand not wanting unsupportive people there. I'd say if reception location is still super close and easy to find just say reception location to be announced following ceremony.

@Harmonie you could definitely just put on the invitation "Reception to follow" and then if you were moving locations just say okay ceremony people here are shuttles/walking directions etc (if secret you should probably provide transport or make it super close/convenient to the ceremony location or provide transport to & from IMO). That way its not a mystery or controversy, we are just putting reception to follow on ours, our ceremony and reception are all in one location but still, people expect to see that but it also gives you the way to not allow unsupportive people there!