Rant- Jack and Jills

So sad. Weddings are not about the money or gifts you get. If it'd your wedding, pay for it. And don't purposely invite people to get a gift from them only. I know too many people that do this.

Fellow Massachusetts bride here. I have no idea where you would live that would make this the norm so...good luck with that.

I'm from MA too and i've seen a few Jack and Jill invitations. declined all of them as I was invited to the Jack and Jill and not to the wedding. It asks for a cover charge, gifts, AND most of them have raffles, which are even more money. More tacky than any dollar dance or honeyfund in my opinion. So rude.

Wait what? You raise money by taking on additional unnecessary expenses and hoping people give you money for it? Yeah, I'm good.

Im from Mass too and I always just thought it meant co-ed. Never heard of the pay to attend thing until on here.

Yup. I've been to one before and not only did I have to pay to go but it was also a cash bar and the bridal party was selling tickets all night for raffles and 50/50 definitely not my kinda thing.

I know there are several other MA brides that have never heard of this so who knows maybe it is a western MA thing...

@Julia, yeah the one I was invited to was in Western MA. So strange.

I've never heard of Jack and Jill but I think I'm going to be sick now that I've learned about them!

I HATE jack & jills. They're fairly popular here in Toronto...I never go. However...I'm in on of my best friends weddings this September and she wants one. The bridal party is expected to participate...I'm dreading this task but she refuses to hear me out when I tell her how tacky they are!!

^^ that's the other part of this - the wedding party is expected to throw the event in many cases. It is a huge amount of work for them and often they spend their own money and many many hours of their time putting it together. All so the bride and groom can make some cash. It's disgustingly greedy.

In addition, there is the shower and bachelorette party that they are STILL expected to throw as well.

I'm literally at one RIGHT NOW & it's super weird. I'm in Virginia, but I'd never heard of these or been to one before this one. I think it's (in this case) because the bride doesn't have much family/friends outside of her fiance's friends, so they almost had to do it this way.

Oh, but this one doesn't have "tickets". It's just a coed shower. I've never heard of that and that's GROSS.

I got invited to two this week, not invited to either wedding. One is an old friend's brother. I might go to that just because they always throw great parties. The other is a girl I have class with twice a week and have no other relationship with. Umm no thanks.

@Tiffany, they are "common" where I'm from too but they are still tacky as shit. You are asking your friends and family to subsidize your wedding. If you can't afford what you are planning, scale back.

I thought a jack and Jill shower was the same thing as a bridal shower but dudes are invited. Lol

Kim, I've been to a few and you basically pay about $25 for unlimited beer at a picnic.

How the hell is 'its common where i come from' any kind of excuse for throwing a party in your own honor, the purpose of which is basically panhandling from everyone you know and treating friends and family as ATM machines that exist to pay for a wedding they arent even invited to.

Flying the confederate flag and casual racism is common where i come from, but im not jumping on board for either of those any time soon. Tacky is tacky, no matter the zipcode.

Niki, Isn't a wedding a party you throw in your own honor? I wouldn't be throwing the jack n Jill myself, it was offered. Do you tell people not to give you gifts or cards with money in them for your wedding or bridal shower? I think $10 entry fee is a lot cheaper than $400 set of pots and pans. Let me just go to Macy's and scan a bunch of stuff I would like to have but not pay for and tell other people to buy it for me instead. Is it not customary for people to do those things for you? And that's hilarious that you're comparing the confederate flag and casual racism to a jack n Jill! ???? thanks for the laugh

You can always not register. You don't have to register for things you don't want.

The fact that everyone on here is attacking Tiffany is just showing the character of the people doing so.. If she wants to have a jack and Jill (which is common where I am from too) why not? My mother had one, and the way that they are being presented as only a way to raise money is strange to me. It's a big party, they are fun, and you win prizes. Most of them are open bar and people WANT to go. Who doesn't want to win a few prizes and hangout with family, friends, or even acquaintances?? I'm sorry but the people on here are just plain mean. I hope you're not like this to your future husbands.. You're what's wrong with the Internet, and acting like one opinion is the ONLY opinion. Take a step back and look at what you're really mad at.. Are you really mad and ranting because a girl wants to throw a party? If you are maybe you need some one to talk to about some deep rooted issues. Weddings are happy and exciting and we should be on here to bring people up, and getting excited for each other.. Not bring people down for stating an opinion. It's not even like she told anyone they were wrong and yet people are getting super intense with anger for what reason..?