Question about alcohol

Anyone else need a glass of wine now?

Melanie, what you are describing is a "cake and punch" style reception. It's acceptable to have this kind of reception as long as it is not during a meal time. It sounds like it's going to be a short affair, so the cake and punch thing is fine. But seriously, knock it off with the "I feel bad for people who need alcohol to have a good time." It's really rude and holier-than-thou.

Me!!!

I don't think you should have a wedding with alcohol if it's a real issue for you and FI. Why compromise on that standard if you live your life accordingly just because it's your wedding? Guests understand a truly teetotaler couple, they've probably noticed at some point you two completely abstaining and even leaving when alcohol is served in your regular life. What they wouldn't understand is if they saw you last month partying away where drinks were everywhere. You sound like you have strong convictions that you live life to consistently so I would say stick to them. But keep the guest list small to people who are aware of this aversion. The people who are suggesting therapy are acting a little overboard. It's not a mental illness guys.

Leelee makes a very, very valid point.

You serve wine and beer and call it a day. If ALL your people are assholes when they drink, perhaps you should consider a new social group, because I can honestly say in the thousands of weddings we've done, there have been maybe a handful of people who got inappropriately inebriated at someone's reception.

Do punch and cake in the afternoon.

K.M. I'm thinking a strong cocktail

Honestly, I seem to be in the minority here. If OP and her FH don't drink at all, they should be able to have to dry wedding that they want. I wouldn't expect 2 vegetarians to serve meat at their wedding. I think this is a bit similar.

I think that if they are very up front about it being dry with ALL of their guests, then they will have done nothing wrong.

If a guest feels that they wouldn't have a good time or feel uncomfortable at a dry wedding they could either plan not to come, or could do as OP does at other weddings and cut their stay at the reception short.

@Helena I agree! I hate when people make alcohol seem like a devil. I mean, if I didn't have wine during wedding planning and the stresses of ever day life I WOULD be a devil.

@K.M. count me in!

OP, I tried to level with you, but the judgement from you is strong. I can't get behind that.

It sounds like OP is having a cake and punch reception which is totally fine. There is no need for booze at a cake and punch.

Since most of your family and friends do not drink, and you're having a short 2 hour reception afterwards, I don't see anything wrong with a dry reception.

I didn't mean to be rude and I apologize for offending anyone by what I said with the I feel bad for people who need alcohol to have fun thing. I've just noticed that it is a common theme that people call a wedding boring without alcohol, and I don't understand why people think dancing and dinner without alcohol is boring. I've been to several weddings with dinner, dancing, and no alcohol and every one had a great time. So I just don't understand why so many people assume something will be boring without alcohol.

Is there some sort of meeting going on behind closed doors about posting and/or commenting on dry-wedding/alcohol threads?

So many copy-paste sounding responses. Multiple threads in multiple days.

It's a friggin' flood in the forums.

OP if you're having a cake and punch reception, it doesn't matter if you have alcohol or not.

Yes K.M. I do. Lol

Some people need a sip or two of some spirits in order to loosen up.

eta: this comment was in reference to the one you posted before this one. If you don't have a DJ, and there's no dancing, then it's fine. Personally I like wine with some of my meals. But at a wedding I do expect - at the minimum - wine.

So my guests will be uncomfortable without alcohol?

I mentioned that pedestal you seem to be on and you denied it but then turned around and said that it's sad that people need alcohol to have a good time.

No one here is judging you because you don't drink. We are telling you that properly hosting is essential. Yet you judge on those who enjoy drinking?

Not "uncomfortable". Just bored - depending on the time of day. That's how I would feel anyway.

I know my guests would be bored if I didn't have alcohol. My Irish side of the family would probably riot or wonder if I have lost my mind.

@Mrs. Fall Bride, I actually do not expect two diehard vegetarians to serve meat at their wedding. If for example, we managed to stay friends through all their meat-is-murder lectures in our regular lives (doubtful but w/e) such that I recieved a wedding invitation, then I absolutely wouldn't expect meat. Now I might not attend but if I did and saw them serving a bunch of meat, I'd actually think it was the height of hypocrisy