Plus 1's??

So my wedding is about my guest. ..not me ...ok that's my problem lol I thought it's was my fiancé & I day and we should be happy but it's about the guest that's why Im making sure they are happy my bad yes I guess I missed that welcome packet...

The ceremony is about you. The reception is literally a thank you to your guests. That is all about them. Telling someone their relationship doesn't matter sure is one hell of a slap in the face thank you.

ETA: Being happy at the expense of your guests is not something that makes a decent person happy.

@che, the ceremony is about you and your husband. Reception? That's to thank your GUESTS.

@MNA you can't invite everyone...I would rather see my family happy then a stranger at my wedding. ..did yall forget I said they just got together I can't cut a person I'm inviting for this new person...NO ROOM in My budget

@Che: Whatever makes you feel better about making poor choices. You have 8 months, and one person would break the budget?

Sounds like you just don't care.

All I can say is bless their heart. I can't even go there tonight.

Having been a single person at a wedding more than once, I think it's shitty to deny people a plus one. Especially if there aren't many of them. And the no strangers thing is weird to me too. You don't do plus ones for you, you do them for the comfort of your guests. And that should be a priority.

Even if you can't afford your niece's SO (which is nonsense - it's ONE person) can you please be sure to invite a grammar teacher? Because wow.

People who identify themselves as in a relationship must be invited with their SO. THIS Is not a plus 1, this is a partner and that relationship should be treated with respect. Why on earth would you invite people to celebrate your relationship while you're disrespecting theirs?

@Che has been giving awful advice all night.... please make it stop!

Che, as an illustration, a close friend of mine did not invite my partner of two years to her wedding because of her budget. She also blew her dress budget by 100% and is coming back from her overseas honeymoon. I notice these things because they make it very clear to me that she is much more selfish and vain than I thought. I will be winding that friendship down. When you choose to do things that are rude, don't be surprised if there are repercussions in your relationships after your wedding. You are literally asking your niece to come celebrate and support your relationship while being unsupportive and disrespectful of her relationship. Don't be surprised later if members of your family hold that against you.

@Che - if your wedding date is correct, you made a HUGE mistake finalizing your guest list already. So much can happen between now and when you send out STDs....to not have flexibility already means you're going to have a hard time with the rest of planning.

Holy crap. This entire post.

So, lets reverse the rolls here. Say your cousin was getting married and you weren't and you had just gotten in a relationship 2 months ago and you still had 8 months until your cousins wedding. You and your SO will have been together for almost a year by the time of her wedding and she didn't invite your SO. I'd be pretty pissed, a lot of relationships are pretty serious at 2 months in (I know mine was) let alone 10 months. You really should invite her SO. It's incredibly rude not to. And, chances are you will have met her by then. Don't be rude, spend the $70 extra. Also, your cousin probably won't stay too long without her SO there, so you're wasting $70 anyways because she will most likely eat and leave. If you don't invite the SO it's pretty much a slap in the face to your cousin.

ETA: Spelling is hard this early.

@OP I'm still unsure of how we're handling this situation. Obviously couples are invited as a social unit, but from past experience, all my single friends invite a friend or cousin to weddings they get a plus one to and I don't want to waste seats on someone's friend instead of an actual date..........

@Kayla: I think that kind of distinction will prove problematic. Are you going to ask them if they are having sex, hoping to have sex, maybe romantic, maybe just a passing fancy? The point if plus ones is to give your truly single guests someone to hang out with, if they choose to do that. Whether that is a friend, "hope to be more than friends", "not sure what we are but we are sleeping together", or a date really isn't the point. If you can't accommodate plus ones in your budget, you don't have to. But you can't control how people choose to use it.

I'm having a similar issue, I am putting +1 on my "master list", but when I send the rsvp I'm putting #of adults, #of children and #of respectfully decline... then when it becomes close I'll call and casually ask if they are bringing someone... but just because you invite x amount doesn't mean x amount will show. People could have prior engagements, family emergencies, etc... or they may wantc to look for single girls at the wedding and not being anyone (my best guy friend does that lol). Ultimately it is your day, you are the Bride, but it would be rude to tell them they can't invite someone...

@che your wedding is in 8 months. At that point your niece will be at almost a year with her girlfriend and thus requires a plus one.

Lauren: if you give them a plus one and they respond that they are bringing someone I think you will be better off assuming that is what will happen. Scheduling conflicts resolve, someone else comes into their life, etc. The invitee could tell you "I don't think my plus one can make it" after responding they are bringing someone, and then show up with their plus one. if you invite with a plus one, and they accept for 2 spots, you need to allocate two spots.

The sh*t that goes down on these forums never fails to amaze me.

For plus ones we've given all single WP members a plus one. We've also given a plus one to single guests who don't know anyone else on the guest, but this was very minimal. Most people on our list are in some kind of relationship, and will be invited together as a social unit because that's what they are. Their SOs aren't plus ones.