Please don't post on facebook?

This brings up a good point. I hadn't thought about this myself. Thanks for the food for thought! (Sorry I don't have an answer).

If you really want it off FB, you'll have to hit up the folks most likely to post about it first. I had congrats on FB two days before my wedding and the morning of my wedding.

I think the programs will help, but I had a note in my programs about having an unplugged ceremony, signs at two of the entrances and a note on my wedding website -- still had 7 or more cameras pointed at me as I walked down the aisle.

So basically, don't count on the programs being enough.

I don't mind congrats - I just don't want to first pictures some people (those who couldnt make it) see of my wedding to be snapped by an iphone with my eyes closed, ya know?

True, people probably won't listen. - Ugh!

Our photographer is the only ones taking pictures at our ceremony. I might post a few of those once she is done editing them...most of my family is far away and will be begging for me to post a few on Fb

Melodie how are you doing this? I mean how do you know guests wont be taking photos?

Have a DOC or the officiant make an announcement just before the ceremony starts -- I really think that's what would have made the difference in my case. I mean, there weren't pictures up before I put one up of my and H, but on top of what you've mentioned, I also wanted to be the one to announce that I was married, but others took care of that for me.

It's fine, I'll remember that when they have good news in the future.

No, I won't do that. I just won't tell the Shary McSharingtons any of my good news.

In the info cards I put in with the invites I mentioned no pics during ceremony(so they have a heads up), it will be in the programs, we may have them do an announcement and I have two photographers that won't be shy on kindly asking people who try to take pictures to please not.

I think it's petty to worry about who gets to Facebook first...I'm not trying to be mean when I say this, but your Facebook friends already know you're getting married. Does it really matter who posts the first photo of it? You can set Facebook settings to where if someone posts a photo of you, it won't show up on your timeline until you okay...but that doesn't mean it won't show up all over that person's newsfeed. Think you are just going to have to deal with that (or risk looking totally controlling and also like overvaluing how much people on Facebook care...again, truly not trying to be mean, just is reality. This is a BIG DEAL to you, and to your wedding guests...but people on Facebook? Um, no. Your wedding is like "oh, cool."

@Stacy, the problem isn't so much MY Facebook friends, but my FB friends' friends -- I only keep it to people I actually know/care about, but not everyone I know does the same. My friend posted pictures after the wedding and the mother of one of her friends commented on it. To me, that's weird, because that's a stranger that's hearing MY news. It's whatever in the end, but I don't like it.

I always think that any good news -- engagement, officially married, etc. -- is for those directly involved to share, not everyone else that happens to know about it.

I've been to a couple of weddings where the MC just mentioned it as part of the info for the day. "The Bride and groom request that you hold off loading photos onto Facebook until after the professional photos have been released".

I'm using Wedpics, so that everyone has a place to load their photos upto, and anyone who was at the wedding can go and view them.

I know Reenski, but unfortunately, Facebook has made the control settings where it just doesn't work that way anymore. It used to weird me out. People I don't know commenting on my engagement photos? But, I got over it. I feel like eventually our choices are get over it or not use Facebook...I have mine on the strongest controls and still get (friend of so and so "liked" your photo) all the time. I mean, literally, we can take it or leave it...since it is a free service, they don't really care what we think.

Oh, yeah, you have to get it over it nowadays. And I do wish the old privacy settings were still in place. It just sucks that even if *I* choose not to broadcast every minute of my life to the world, other people can do so for me. I'm very selective with being tagged/checked in to places -- in fact, I don't think I approve any place check ins, for this reason. It's just too weird. Same with not using FB -- even if I leave, my friends would be able to broadcast my life on there. It's a shame really.

But back to the point at hand, I think there's no harm in asking. My friends know me -- I wasn't even in a relationship on FB with my H until after the wedding, I never mentioned my wedding (especially since I have mutual acquaintances that weren't invited, one who actually offered to pay to come to my wedding o_O) so I think if I had kindly asked a few of them not to, posted my picture right after the ceremony, then told them to go to town, they would have understood.

I guess I understand wanting to be the first... But FH and I are leaving on our HM the next day so the first pics we are going to see are going to be the ones on FB. We are actually having a contest with our guests for the best picture... we want the candid shots that our professional photographers may not capture. I could care less who posts them on FB first.

Maybe do something cute and fun that gets your point across. Something like...

"Like" what you're seeing now--Share it later.

(Please, no photo sharing on social media)

Shuan - I am totally in love with you right now. PERFECT

I have my occasional moments, glad I could help

We set up a WedPics album for everyone to upload pictures too...or at least we hope they will...we want lots of pics from everyone, especially the candid shots the photographers may not catch...but I'm a little on the fence about who should be first to post pics onto Facebook...at least they can't "tag" us until we accept if we go in and adjust that setting....but I do like Shaun's idea...hope i can remember that when I print our programs if we decide to use that.

My cousin got married in October last year. We all brought out phones and cameras with us. Took tons of pictures between all of us family members and that ended up saving her because her photographer moved the week after my cousin's wedding and LOST ALL OF HER PICTURES.. so the only pictures she has of her wedding are from family and friends who were there.

I would be devastated if that happened. Just wanted to share that...

There's an iPhone ap called "wedding party" where guests can upload all their photos to the ap during the wedding, and then you have access to all of them. I guess they could still go and upload them to fb, but I think people would respect it if you asked them to let you pick out the good ones to post.

There's info cards you put out during the reception with the name of the ap and instructions - it's like the modern day disposable cameras! - you could just a line that says please let the couple choose which pictures get posted online

I'm having a small destination wedding in the Caribbean with 26 guests, so unless they have an international plan, they are going to get charged a hefty fee for uploading photos from their phones or answering calls, texting, etc during my wedding, but it is such a small group that we thought we'd just go ahead and include the information in our pre-travel brochure that I'm mailing out next month.

We also are doing a WedPics account for guests to upload to.

We are allowing people to take photos at the reception but absolutely no photos during the ceremony. Of course I will word this nicely I am also asking folks to refrain from posting on Facebook as well. I will post a few shots on there taken by the professional photographer, but that's it. I have a wedding coordinator so I will also have her remind guests to not take photos at the ceremony as they are seated.