parents inviting guests to the wedding

My parents are contributing to the wedding and they're inviting 10 couples/20 people - all of whom i know and have been friends of the family for quite some time.

FILs are not contributing (which is fine) and FMIL recently inquired (as in about an hour ago) about inviting some friends of hers -- about 3 or so couples. i don't know them (and FH said he hasn't seen them in quite some time) so we're not quite sure how we feel about it.

My mom is paying for a good chunk and she is inviting some friends whom I've known my entire life. FH's mom had quite the list and I let him know she needed to cut it back because they were some people he doesn't even really know and they are not contributing one bit, not even for the rehearsal. So yeah.... I'm still a little irked about that BUT FH is also footing a good portion of our end so it was his call.

My GRANDMOTHERS did this to me. Neither of them is attending (cross-country travel and they're afraid; I'm trying to be understanding but I'd be lying if I said it didn't ruffle my feathers) but they sent me 40 names combined to add to my guest list.

Nevermind that most of the guests are from my mom's side and won't recognize my last name and they're sure as heck not going to recognize FH's. I'm just picturing dozens of people opening up my invite this week and having no clue whose wedding they were just invited to 2500 miles away.

Ridiculous.

Not unless they're family that we know. I nipped random guests in the bud very early on. As far as I'm concerned this is not a time for high school or family reunions. However, those who have contributed to some things were asked. FH's grandmother and my mom did pay for the honeymoon so we did ask but both declined and we moved on.

@Carly I get the ruffled feathers thing. FH's grandparents are still "deciding" whether or not they're coming....if the elders in my family were still alive (and they are 10-20 years older than his grandparents if they were still alive), they would be there without hesitation, even in the worst of health. Nevermind the fact that I was instrumental in his grandmother's care when she was sick last year...I'm not bitter...

No and no. We're not having that kind of wedding. We're expecting ~55 guests; just family and OUR closest friends. FILs are hosting their own "reception" (supposedly for us) a couple weeks after our wedding. I'm sure it will be filled with all their third cousins and every last friend and member of their church. Knowing them, even the mailman will be there.

Yes, my mother and future inlaws both have invited guests. All people FH and I know well. Everyone has been kind enough to chip in on the wedding.

@RATR same thing over here!!! It pissed me off but my parents are paying for most and said they don't care.. I hope I can be like them one day because that shit wouldn't fly as of now

Only about 80 of the guests are mine and FHs friends. The rest are my moms guests. I know them all so it doesn't bother me. She is paying for everything. My MIL didn't want to invite that many people, only like 10

That's what happened at FH and I's daughters first birthday party. FH handed invitations to his mom which gave some to his grandma, which was then handed out.

FH didn't know half the people that came...neither did I.

I told FH that I cannot and WILL NOT be anything like our daughters birthday party and he agreed...however, he's given me his guest list for his friends but referred me to his mom for the rest of his family. Which I still to this day have not received his full family guest list!! (apparently there's some members of his family he does not want at our wedding)...I'm just praying it doesn't end up like our daughters birthday party. I know I will blow a fuse if it does.

We're paying and I didn't ask them for a list. I know the family and friends that should be there because they have been to all my other life events.

Both sets of parents are contributing, but we haven't given them free reign over the guest list... FH and I have added several family friends (from both sides) who have been and remain important parts of our lives, and who we will share aspects of our married lives with, however we agreed on a rule that (barring exceptional circumstances) neither myself nor FH should be meeting new people at our wedding. With a guest list of (hopefully!) around 90, there's not the space or budget to invite everyone that has ever had anything to do with us, or our parents.

My mom is. I know most of them. But she's paying a lot of money so idc

Yes, we are inviting friends of my parents to our wedding, and yes, they are footing the bill. A few of them have been extremely involved in my life since I was born and I have called them aunts and uncles all 29 years of my life. I would have invited them to my wedding regardless of who was paying! There are also a few friends that my parents spend a lot of time socially with now that they are empty nesters. These friends commented to my mom about not being able to wait to be there. When my mom mentioned this to me, I said I had already figured she and my dad might have a few friends who they would want to invite and I had no problem with this.

Yes all around. Our parents are paying for the whole wedding and they are inviting their friends. However, at least for my parents, they are all people I would have wanted to invite anyway. They also made it clear that it was our wedding and they didn't want us to cut any of our friends to make room for theirs.

My parents are paying for the food only (about 20 pp) .... everything else is on us... this has caused quite a good chunk of interesting conversations

Parents are not paying for anything. We will likely give each of them a small number.

My parents are paying for most of our wedding and they're inviting a bunch of friends. They're all people I know and have known for many years. FILs aren't contributing, but they're inviting 2 or 3 couples each (they're divorced).

My dad is graciously paying for the majority of the wedding. We asked my parents and FIL's for a list but were very clear we would get final say in who comes. It's mainly family friends that one (or both) FH and I know.

As for future in laws, my fiance's mom and stepdad are paying for the rehearsal dinner and their portion of our guest list for the wedding is all extended family. My FFIL and his long time girlfriend are invited, along with his mother and the girlfriend's parents (I've met her parents). FFIL doesn't have a good relationship with his siblings, so my fiance doesn't want them there. As far as I know, FFIL and his girlfriend haven't made any requests to influence the guest list.