Hey everyone
Need a bit of advice & also venting:
My wedding is scheduled for 10/02/21. I invited 80 people, and I only have about 18 attending. This is the only time in my life I’ve asked people to show up for me, and the majority of people have communicated with me that they don’t want to come. And I’m going to be honest—a lot of family and friends have been downright mean about it. I’m talking about the people I’ve spent every Christmas with since I was little. One close family member told me I’m not a priority to her, and that’s why she’s not coming. Further, I’ve caught multiple people in lies about why they’re not attending. On the other side, my fiancé’s family isn’t in the picture and his friends aren’t willing to come because of Covid.
I understand that the 18-20 people that would be there are the ones who truly love me. But my fiancé and I are paying for this wedding ourselves. It’s going to be about $20k regardless of who shows up. I still have to pay food and beverage minimums so I’m basically paying for those who aren’t attending. Which upsets me and reminds me of the hurt that these people have caused. This is not what I imagined or wanted for the most important day of my life. Needless to say, I’m hurting.
I think I’ve probably answered my own question by now, but do I cancel our wedding? I considered rescheduling in another year for the people who cited Covid as a reason for not attending. But now I don’t know if I trust those relationships enough to show up for me even if Covid was gone. The second option is canceling the wedding and eloping. But that also brings sadness because neither my fiancé or I ever wanted that.
What do I do?! Help!