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Dedicated December 2017

Need to know if I'm being being selfish

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TheBestieEsti, on June 18, 2017 at 1:09 PM

Okay, so kind of a long story. My fiance and I have been together for 7 years and we have 4 children, one together and he has 3 from a previous relationship. We decided together that December 17th would be the best day for us to get married. For one, it was the day we met. Also, my son was born on July 17th and his oldest was born on December 17th and it's Christmas time which happens to be our favorite time of the year. Well, we picked our venue in September of last year and we told the kids first, his oldest says "Oh, you're getting married on my 16th birthday, cool!" Well, when we started actually planning our wedding, my fiance and I already knew who we wanted in our wed. party. Well, my FMIL kept insisting I have the bday girl in my bridal party. My answer was always no, until she kind of made me feel guilty and said since it's her bday she should be in the bridal party. So, I caved and said if she is willing to cover her costs, she can be in the wedding. Cont. in comments

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167 Comments

Savvy October 2017
Stacey · on June 24, 2017 at 7:59 AM
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Just switch dates .. you won't regret it ..take the fsd dress shopping n a girls day out . Then it won't be selfish .
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Expert December 2017
Knwilson12 · on June 24, 2017 at 9:28 AM
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All I can imagine is every year after the wedding.. the interaction between FH and FSD telling each other happy birthday and happy anniversary on the same day and then hugging as they both cringe because this is a cringeworthy situation.
OP, you done messed up.
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Devoted July 2012
Chris · on June 24, 2017 at 9:55 AM
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@Stephanie, so every year when the daughter wants to celebrate her birthday with her family and the couple is all...but it's our anniversary and we want to celebrate that .... whose fault is the conflict of dates?
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Dedicated May 2017
Judith · on June 24, 2017 at 10:04 AM
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I really get the feeling that she is getting a bit jealous and feels like she is not getting attention. After all its is her bday and nothing to her understanding is being done for her.
I understand your frustration and i would just talk with the videographer and give him a heads up. Also, i would tell FMIL and bday girl her responsibilities as a BM.
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VIP May 2017
New · on June 24, 2017 at 10:22 AM
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Wait, you've been together for 7 years and you decided the best day to get married is your step-daughter's 16th birthday? That's cold.
I'd find another day.
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VIP November 2017
Beachy · on June 24, 2017 at 10:24 AM
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This was posted like 6 days ago and haven't heard shit from OP since that day. this thread died a long time ago.
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VIP October 2017
Cassidy · on June 25, 2017 at 9:17 AM
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I do think it's kinda selfish to not include your stepdaughter. You're marrying her father after all, it's kind of a big deal for her. But I do think you should acknowledge her birthday as it is still her birthday and if it's on your anniversary all the time it will get swept under the rug. That could hurt her because it will seem like you only care about your husband and not his family. I don't really think it's necessary for the white gown and whatnot that's too much and not an hour of photos. Just maybe a few minutes
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