Need Advice: Honeyfund or no Honeyfund?

Damn all these ladies got their panties in a bunch. We did a honeyfund and our families loved it and no one has ever thought it was rude... I've gotten many thank you'd for making it easy for my out of town guest.

Seriously? You had to bring up a dead 4 day old post to complain about what people were saying? Everyone has already made valid points as to why it's rude so I'm not even going to touch that part and waste my time, but this is ridiculous.

Right because people would totally say you were being rude to your face right? No, they'll say it on the car ride home when they list off everything else that they disliked about the wedding.

Just let your guests give you money, or a small registry gift. A honeyfund is tacky. Literally ALL of our guests, gave us money for our wedding (without us asking for it).

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I have never heard of this but I'm not up on things. We have not even registered anywhere but are a couple in our 40's. We are actually renting a number of houses for family to join us as a reunion of sorts at our beach wedding and don't expect a thing from anyone.

Nope. And if you already know you're receiving money, why ask for it?

We attended a wedding last summer... The couple lives together and they have a child. They asked for money or Lowe's gift cards to do remodeling. Ik everyone here says it's rude... I wasn't offended by being asked for money. Idk how the other guests felt. I've commented this story before, and got lots of "ew Shannon"... lol But just telling you my experience with it.

Let me preface this by saying that the norm where I'm from is to give cash at the wedding. I normally give $200-$300 to a couple for their wedding and spend about $100 on a shower gift.

We went to a wedding that had a Honeyfund and I was appalled by the lack of etiquette out and out asking to fund a sex vacation that I didn't give my usual cash. I found the cheapest thing on the physical registry and gave that. I wasn't the only one. This was the first wedding I had been to in 30+ years that had physical gifts at the wedding. It seems that no one save a few contributed to their Honeyfund nor gave cash. Also, EVERYONE was talking about the egregious etiquette disaster that was the wedding: Gap, no cocktail hour, Honeyfund, friendors, unplugged ceremony, etc.

If they give money instead of gifts then what are you worried about? Just don't register for gifts. Honeyfunds take a cut of the money so it is not logical to use this (besides the fact that it is also rude), if you think that you will get cash anyway.

Why would you revive this just to start shit?

@patricia nicely said!!!!!

Good lord, Kiersten, no it's not.

Why won't people just let the thread die?? FFS Kiersten...Patricia's comment was actually severely incorrect (PPs already explained why, but you obviously ignored that), and not well said. However, thank you so much for bringing this thread back for the third time. *insert exasperated eye roll here*

If honeyfund would make it easier for your guests to send you money, then do it. Those who planned to give you money as a gift will be fine with your decision. I went to a wedding with a honeyfund and did not consider it rude, but a savvy and easy way to transfer money. Similar to Shannon, the couple lived together and wanted to remodel their home. So a monetary gift made sense. But either way we will give what is asked. If the couple wants money, we give money. If the couple wants a toaster, we give a toaster.

No

How much easier does it get than putting money in a fucking envelope??

ADULTS KNOW THAT PEOPLE WANT MONEY. They are not idiots that go around thinking "well they didn't ask for money so I guess I can't give them that $50 that I was planning on.." if they want to give you money then they will. You don't need to ask for it. It's rude and honestly presumptuous. You aren't owed a gift because you're getting married.