My first wedding dress shopping experience- Share yours!

Loved the last dress I was in she was expecting me to buy it right there, that day! I was not at all prepared for this as I had told her this was my first consult. Maybe this is how they do things in Germany? Certainly, I couldn't buy a dress that my Mother hadn't even had the chance to see me in yet. So while the lady was wonderful I could tell she was not happy with the fact I didn't buy the dress that day. I've since decided that I want to continue looking and the ball gown style as much as I loved that dress, it's just not going to be my dress. My Mom is coming in three weeks to visit & go dress shopping with me and I am afraid if we go back to that shop and don't buy the lady will again be upset.

Has anyone else had a similar experience your first time?

Where I bought my dress, I wasn't allowed to take pictures until I purchased the dress. I too asked who made the dress and it was the stores name. It was my 1st time dress shopping and I did go with the dress after going out to eat with my friends. We ran over to Davids Bridal after eating and looked for something similar and didn't have anything so I went back and got the dress that made me smile and I fell in love with.

I think that is pretty typical, the pressure to buy right then! I went to 2 stores and they both offered 10% if you buy on your first day of shopping. I gave in and bought at the second store. I'm happy with my decision, don't get me wrong, but the pressure was really freaky!

I personally did not have the best dress shopping experience and really I think I ended up buying when I did just to avoid having to shop any more! I love my dress so much and it's the one that I had found online and been staring at for so long as the only dress I really loved, so no regrets, but totally wish it had been more fun!

My first experience was not that great either. It was during a trunk show and towards the end of the afternoon so I understood that the consultant may have been tired. She continued to put me in strapless gowns (whicn I was adament I didn't want) and never once showed me any other style so after an hour or so (this is after waiting an hour past my appoitnment time AND goign up to the desk once to hear I was next then after 15 or so mins goign back up and seeing my slip had been pushed back and complaining). Needless to say I didn't buy there and I'm thankful that I am not easily pressured. Infact I go in the opposite direction as a defense mechanism if I feel pressured. I did end up buying a strapless gown to my surprise but it was one that was perfect and I love love love it! :-)

My whole experience has been bad honestly, (Not all the fault of the salon). My first was awful. I went to David's bridal and the lady was all over me to buy buy buy. She wouldn't pick the dresses I picked out online for me, and I ended up leaving very discouraged, but some people have a great experience. I love the salon I ended up buying from (3rd try) they are great.

I basically had a similar experience when I tried dresses for the first time. I wanted to try dresses first with my mom so I flew to Puerto Rico (where my family lives) and went to a place there. Same thing, very secretive about designers and styles (even to the point of lying, and telling it was a designer and when I was alone and check the label it was another) and absolutely no pictures or even cellphones allowed in the room. I tried a few dresses and liked a couple, but got out of there and I'm not planning to go back. I really think is a cultural thing. But is not all bad, I came back to Illinois and went to a fantastic store in my town. No preasure at all, I was able to take tons of pictures send texts to my sister in PR to see what she thought right away. I fell in love with a dress, but I didn't buy because I just want to look a little more and try more dresses just for fun.

Maggie!! - Finally found a date twin, exciting! :-)

My experience did not involve a bridal shop. I went to the running of the brides and got my dress there. I tried on 30 dresses in one hour. Traded the ones I didn't like and found my dress in 70 minutes. It was originally $2000 but I got it for $500.

I almost got this $6000 Anne Barge dress but it was not for me. I gave it to one very happy bride who ended up buying it for $700.

No champagne involved, just the satisfaction of getting a good deal.

I'm sorry you went through that at the bridal shop.

I never bothered to make an appointment anywhere, I'm a walk-in shopper (at the salons that allow it, of course). I wouldn't try on dresses without my mother present, so I made it a point to schedule times with her to try things on. Fortunately, I never had to deal with a pushy salesperson. I'd be pretty clear up front if I didn't intend to buy that day, but they were all still really helpful. I too go into defense mode when I feel pressured, which will make me more difficult to sell to. When I ended up finding my dress, I was actually alone and trying on a dress that I didn't think I'd like at all. But the sample was my size and 50% off. Put it on and it looked AMAZING! I waited until a few days later to purchase so I could bring my mom to see it. She loved it, and then the sale was made.

If you know that you won't purchase today, esp without mom's input, then let the salesperson know upfront. I think it takes pressure off of them and then they'll take it off of you. Good Luck!

My experience was wonderful all the way through, I just didn't anticipate being expected to buy a dress on the first day as I clearly told her this was my first time and I wanted to get a feel for the different styles. I just assumed that it was normal for women to shop around before buying and thought the pressure at the end was unexpected is all. I honestly felt bad bc the sales lady was wonderful.

My first experience was as a walk-in at Alfred Angelo. They were kind enough to fit me in near closing time, and I tried on a dress I like online, but was not nearly as cute on me in person. Ended up trying on a dress they had on a mannequin, and loved it -- but it was still too soon to buy. I went with my BFF/MOH to two other stores to try on dresses, but none came close to the AA dress. I felt bad because the salespeople were super nice, and they understood when I said I needed my mom to see dresses before I made a choice. I ended up going to a small bridal shop with my mom that was having a sample sale. First dress, we were like, done. Fit me amazingly, was the style that AA made me love, simple. We were allowed to take pictures, and we were the only ones in the shop. Definitely a good experience there, all of them were pretty good.

How exciting Ginny!

I also found my dress at the first shop and it was nothing like I imagined I would want. I didn't buy it that day - I waited a week, made another appointment, brought a friend, and THEN bought it. I'm just not the type of person to pull the trigger on a big purchase like that without doing my due diligence.

It sounds like the shop was very secretive and wanted to prevent shopping around, if they covered the designer tags. I do think European shopkeepers have different attitudes towards customers than American shopkeepers do - there's none of that "customer is always right" attitude, at least IME. But I wouldn't generalize that experience to be a cultural thing. It sounds like it was just that shop.

If you're worried about going back, maybe send a note thanking the salesperson for her time and telling her you'll be back when her mom visits. Germans are pretty logical. And they appreciate stationery. At least the ones I know. lol.

@ Gin. I had a similar shopping experience the second time I went. I was with my MOH and went to a local shop in my hometown (where I'm getting married). The whole experience was very weird, again would not let us take pictures, cut off tags so we couldn't see the designer or the price (had to ask about the price) and the women who worked there had no personal sense of style (one had her hair in style that is only acceptable on someone very young). When I phoned them a few days later to get the style (so I could send a picture to my mom), they wouldn't give it to me unless I bought the dress. Well I did not end up buying my dress from them for obvious reasons. Found my dress with my mom a few months later at a great salon, which allowed you to take pictures, had the tags on every dress and even wrote the dress style on a card which you could have. There was no sale pressure, just a nice experience overall.

That's not nice.

When I went my first time I told the consultant that I might wear my mom's dress but that I wanted to at least try some dresses on so I knew. (this was at 5pm for a 1hr appt) She pulled one of every style, A, ballgown, destination, fit and flare, mermaid etc.

She narrowed down what kind I liked (mermaid, totally unexpected) and I said OK, well now that I know at least what style I like I shouldnt waste your time cause I know Im not gonna buy today.

She said not so fast, you like this style so I just want you to try these 5 more. I said "but you guys close in like 5 min" and she said that's OK just try. Then she gave me the dress maker and style number of the 3 I had really liked and sent me on my way. No pressure once so ever. She was ever so lovely. And really that's the best thing they can do. I went to her website and wrote a wonderful review.

When my mom came to town I took her there so I could try the 3 on, and had 2 more appointments that day. Again No

Pressure, and off I went to my next appt.

Where I found the dress of my dreams. I never bought from the store where the lady was awesome. But I did take my mom back there to get her mother of the bride dress and I have recommended it to many other people since. http://www.ladybugbridal.ca/ in Guelph Ontario. They arn't the biggest store and they only have a few staff, but they make you feel wonderful. I would send anyone there in a heart beat even though I didn't end up getting my gown there.

Every ones experience should be that good. I woudl take your mom back to that lady, who cares if she is upset if you don't buy. It's your money and it's not her choice, by not giving you the style number so you can even remember it in my opinion is bad for business.

Good luck

It's great reading everyone else's experience and to know what I experiences as far as the sales pressure is pretty normal and not just here in Germany. I originally wanted to buy my dress in the US bc they are more expensive here but I won't be able to fly back enough for fittings. The recommendations I have had have been to buy it here so I don't have any fitting issues and then I just have to travel to the US with it once. But I cringe at some of the price differences. For example an Alfred Angelo BM dress I need for a wedding I am in this summer cost $150 in the US and here it cost 500 euros ($620 USD). I was shocked! I am buying that dress in the US and getting fitted right before the wedding.

My first experience was a little frantic. First off we were running late because of horrible traffic, and i was feeling way sick so we had to stop once on the way. Once we finally got there she had me pull some dresses from racks while she was with another bride, after that I pretty much only saw the consultant to help me in and out of dresses, and then she was off helping someone else. After like 10 dresses, all of them very pretty and flattering, but non of them "my" dress the consultant started pulling random dresses. I understand that often people love things they never thought they would- but my consultant was fixated on the idea of lace and was pulling all these dresses with lace, even though lace wasn't necessarily a must have for me- just a like. And it wasn't just like she was pulling ballgowns when i wanted a trumpet skirt- she was pulling things with all these decorations and weird things on them that i would never wear for my wedding. They were just to fussy.

Can you buy in the US, ship it/fly with it to Germany so you have it close at hand for fittings, and then travel back to the US with it?

It's not ideal but it's kind of what I did. I bought my dress in CO b/c that's where we lived at the time. Then we moved to Nashville while it was on order, and we ended up staying here longer than we thought. Also our wedding is in Chicago. I just found a seamstress in Nashville that I really love, had the dress shipped to her when it came in so it's here for fittings, and then I'll travel to Chicago with it.

Seems like the price difference would make up for the shipping cost if you can't take it on a plane with you, and then you get to shop in the US with your mom.

Just an idea!

I went into the bridal store the first time, looked through all the racks and only found one. They talked me into trying it on, though that was not the plan, and I did. It was amazing, ivory, lace with rhinestones, pearls, it was "the one." They asked me to purchase it then and there, I said no, I will sleep on it and if I returned the next day, then it was decided. I took some pics in the dress and sent them to my mother, 2 hours away. She called in a frenzy, said she would be down the next day and we would go back. So, we did. It felt even better the second day. I looked through the racks again, but nothing. So we took it home. It's been in my closet since August of 2011 and I look at it daily, it is still just perfect for me. I wanted vintage, and it is just perfect. If I'd had my way, i would have worn my grandmothers dress, however it had been ruined. so this was a good second choice.

I never had a dress experience. everytime i got close to going i started hyperventilating and crying. I just had such a limited budget and the idea of going to do it without my mom (passed away) just sent me into crazy mode.

I knew what style I wanted (a line) some kind of shoulder thing (to cover that fat that comes up out of strapless dresses) and max budget $500.

Online I went-took a gamble on a bride selling a former sample she could no longer wear. Other than it needed a little more love than was described, it worked out perfectly (seller even refunded a little to help with the cleaning costs). Im not terribly picky-this route is not for all brides. I have never had a wedding dress on my body except for this one and that was after it arrived.

here it is (not me of course) for $300 with shipping and $200 for cleaning and alterations = $500

@ Kris- I am considering doing that. I will be home for a visit this summer and if I find one then, I may very well get it there and perhaps my sister can bring it when she visits me if I can have it shipped to her. I'll be home in Aug so that is still 8 months before my wedding and would be doable I think.