Monster In Laws

I feel like I'm worthless. His mom tried to split us apart THIS WEEK WHEN THE WEDDING IS IN 4 DAAAYSSS!!! I don't live with him either yet, when my mom and I went to visit his mom (who just traveled to cali) and she literally flat out told my mom that she doesn't want me marrying my hubby and that she wants him to marry someone else LIKE WTF and then she proceeded to say a bit later, that the day I come to the house she's going to make me scrub all the tiles in our house. WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?? IM trying to be nice but I'm not sure what comebacks I could have and I'm like a pushover and I hate it. I'm going to try being strong and stand up to them. They've taken it WAY too far. My hubby has told me and reassured me that he wants ME to be happy and he wants to marry me and whatever I want will happen. Not what they want. But still I need a friend right now :"(

Woah...I need some time to take this one apart. Give me a minute or two, okay Nadinoreo?

What? This all sounds very toxic. Wait for Rachel to come up with something then pretend I said it too. I hope things work out for you.

Hold on let me read this over

Okay, first things first (and it's not the wedding). You are not worthless. You may be dealing with an unbalanced individual, but that doesn't change who you are. So, let's start there.

Just for reference, are you already married to this man and having a big celebration on Saturday? I only ask because you continually refer to him as "hubby".

I'm a little confused. Who "hates" your gown? You say that your "hubbys parent in laws HATE IT", but that would be your parents, right (and I don't think that's what you're saying)? So are we talking about your FH's parents or his grandparents? I'm a little confused.

Oh, and just to be clear -- you're upset, but not willing to bitch slap anyone (let alone set them on fire), right?

Then, it gets even more strange -- his sister and niece, who live in Australia, went to a salon and tried on the same gown you're wearing on Saturday? What? How could she do that if, as you say, "they don't know my size, my STYLE, They haven't talked to me EVER before in the last 2 years." I'm really confused...how could she photograph herself in a duplicate of your wedding gown if she doesn't even know what your gown looks like?

You also wrote, "and then she proceeded to say a bit later, that the day I come to the house she's going to make me scrub all the tiles in our house. WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?? IM trying to be nice but I'm not sure what comebacks I could have and I'm like a pushover and I hate it. I'm going to try being strong and stand up to them. They've taken it WAY too far."

You don't need "comebacks", you need to seriously consider what the hell you're getting involved with -- legally speaking. You don't live with him now, but the weight of your comment that says when you "come to the house" she's going to make you scrub all of the tiles...what the hell? Are you moving in with his parents after his wedding -- are they moving in with you? You haven't even lived with him -- why would you invite his parents to be a part of this very challenging part of your life?

Listen, this is very disjointed, and the way in which you're expressing yourself concerns me. Can you take a few minutes, calm down, and talk as though none of us have any of the backstory, because right now, I'd say RUN.

Does your FH know about the alternative gown that they are trying to buy for you? Does he know how they treat you? Their behavior is absolutely appalling and I can't believe you and your FH have let it go on this long. I know in a previous post that you have complained about you FILs and how they treat you.

I know a lot of people are going to tell you that your FH needs to deal with this, and he does, because they are his family but you need to stand up for yourself. Their behavior is not going to magically change if you just ignore it.

As for the dress, let them buy it. Let them waste their money and bring it and then you can tell them to their faces that you aren't wearing it. If they want to make fools of themselves them by all means let them.

Most importantly, you need to stop begging for their approval because that is obviously not going to happen. You need to decide if you are willing to endure this treatment for the rest of your life. Because honestly, if this were me I would be running so fast and far from this nightmare of a family.

Hello! I'm sorry My phone died in the middle of typing

I'll clear up what I wrote because it doesn't make sense hahaha

Let them buy you the second dress and then set that in fire instead. His family definitely sounds toxic. No wonder he wants to marry you, you are the opposite of them and he needs someone positive in his life

Thank you for everything! This Sunday we will be having our wedding reception and we have already had a private ceremony, without his parents or siblings because they were out of the country.

I personally like how simple and traditional my gown is, his mom , sisters, dad, they all hate it.. Frankly, I don't think thy hate it, I think they are mad I didn't take his mom with me to pick the dress out (she was out of the country) but she has offered to buy me a dress from their country, and have her other daughter in law try it in. I told her no thank you and I'm not comfortable with that AT ALL. I would never let anyone pick out a dress I want to wear for my husband and for the beginning of our forever, and also let another girl I barely know try it on. None of them are the same size as me anyways lmao.

His mother tried to split us apart the moment she stepped foot into America, she's told him she wants him to marry someone else. He told her no and that he loves me.

When I went to visit her (the 4th day I saw her) and I brought my mom along with me to meet her, and she started saying a lot of rude things (mom stood up to her obviously) my hubby was out working at the time. And then when I was in the kitchen pouring water into a cup, she told me how she wants me to scrub all floors, especially the bathroom floors. I literally haven't even moved in. That's not the first thing in my mind as a bride like wtf...

His mom and dad will be staying with us until the end our August. His sister, his nieces, are coming to live with us for 2 weeks.

I have tried countless times to try and talk to his sister who doesn't EVER pick up, or send me a message or anyyyything. (Btw this is his sister in Australia) I've sent her so many and she literally replied with a thumbs up emoji or a smiley. Now, her daughter is the same age as I am. I've tried talking to her and she tries to one up me every time I'd post anything, it's weird af. Okay so she doesn't like me also because she once sent me a message basically saying she doesn't like me after I sent her a picture or clip of me and her uncle... she doesn't even know me?? I was just trying to show her he says hi to her and her mom?? If I post a picture of a cake I made or something I've done, literally that same night she will go and post something she's done... like wtf kinda game is she playing. I don't have anything against her, I've always been nice to them... I told my hubby and he told me his sister will call me back she's just busy, and I told him about her daughter and he told me to not speak to her or maybe she didn't mean it.

So today, his sister and her daughter went to a bridal dress store without speaking to me about my size, my dress style, my OPINION of them buying the dress. She let her daughter try on the dresses!!!!! I'm not the same height or size as her daughter first of all, second of all, her daughter (his niece) was sending me Snapchats of her posing in the dress and like acting like it's HERS. Keep in mind she's always trying to show off and one up me. I was so shocked and hurt.

Literally they disregarded my feelings, disrespected me, and who the hell does that!!!?? I've already explained to his mom the first time how uncomfortable I was.

I told my hubby and he understood. He thought it was okay??? I'm so upset. How is it okay???

I'm gonna post a picture of my dress in this comment

I meant this comment. This is me in my dress. I like it like this... it needs dry cleaning and better lighting but I like it

My dress again

These are the pics his sister took of her daughter in the dress they wanted to buy me. She's even wearing a fucking veil and blusher... is it her dress??? I'm sorry for cussing but I'm taking it personal. Yes this dress is pretty but it's not what I like. It's what they like and what my mother in law likes

Or this dress. But I said no. I called my hubby and told him that I'm not okay with this at all. Why aren't they happy with my decision? Would he want my brother to go put on a suit and for me to be like YEAH LOOKS GREAT 10/10. My hubby would look fantastic in this!!!

Awww thank you, I hope I'm the opposite lol. I've tried being nice and I just don't know what I'm supposed to say or do anymore *sigh* I don't think I can last 2 months without exploding, let alone one night with them if they're doing this to us before the wedding reception this Sunday!! I love my bb, he's wonderful and amazing, but his family is so scary haha

Btw the pics I posted are me at the store without it being hemmed or making the shoulders tighter

I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't be ranting on here, but idk what I should do. I want to say yes to forever with him, but I want them to understand that I'm not going anywhere, that I love him and he loves me more!! They can't just decide our fate for themselves. It's not up to them. I don't want to ruin a wonderful relationship because of these crazy mean people around him

DO NOT let any of his family live with you for any period of time. Your floors are none of their business, your dress is none of their business, and your marriage is none of their business.

His whole family knew, he told me they were okay with it. I had his cousins come. He knew they wouldn't be able to come till July. In my culture it's weird but there's a lot of things we can't do unless we have our ceremony. He told me it was okay and I trusted that. I talked to her and she said it was okay. I know they don't like me because I was raised in America, but I'm still traditional and speak the same language wth the same customs. She doesn't like me because I'm not a wife she picked out. We met on our own. That's why she hates me. it sucks

Thank you!!!!!