Maid of honor dropped out

Why did you pick them so early? Stop worrying about bridesmaid and focus on actual wedding planning. Go back to bridesmaid in a year from now

I wanted to ask early because of the costs of being a bridesmaid and I knew my girls would have to have some time to save up. She dropped out because she doesn't think she can save the money up.

When you lose two, I start to wonder what you're doing/telling them about your wedding that's making them not want to be a part of it.

The first was a disagreement about the fact that I would expect her to wear a dress as my bridesmaid and she refused to.

Does she normally wear dresses? And you shouldn't have to save for two years to be a bridesmaid

Yes what are you telling them? I'm sure I'm a bit older than you and all of my BM are professionals...a vice principal, a head nurse, and a professional chef. I gave them a color swatch, a length, and a fabric style and told them to get something within their budget. Just show me a pic before purchase and they all found something they liked. Maybe try that route and maybe she can afford to stay

Does that person typically wear dresses? What did they want to wear instead?

Honestly, you started this way too early; many people cannot commit to being part of a 'wedding' process that is going to last a year and a half.

She typically would wear dresses for special occasions so I wasn't sure why this was any different. She wanted to wear the men's suits, but FH was unhappy with that option. He wants a traditional bridal party. And I told my girls here's the color, here's the length, and please just have some kind of straps so nobody has to worry about it falling down. I was really surprised to get the message about not being able to be a part of it considering she had never had a problem with it before.

You would expect her to wear a dress... does she *want* to wear a dress? That right there kind of signals you don't care much about what makes them comfortable spending their money on versus what matches your "wedding vision". Like elizabeth, I too question where the blame lies when multiple people drop out.

It's none of your FH's business what your bridesmaids wear.

Glad a "traditional bridal party" (whatever the fuck that means) took precedence over your friend.

If she ran into unexpected financial difficulty then you should thank her for telling you and say that you hope she will still come as a guest. Being a bridesmaid is expensive and can be difficult on a tight budget.

You might want to also look at what you are expecting your bridesmaids to spend and see if you can make it more affordable. How expensive are the dresses you want? What other expenses are you expecting them to pay?

How much are you expecting them to pay as a bridesmaid?

Since my girls are all college students or on a limited income, I was mainly just having them worry about them paying for their dresses and shoes. If they wanted to help pay for hair or makeup, it would be nice but they don't have to. And as far as the traditional bridal party look, that's the only thing that he has asked for specifically other than that the groomsmen wear bowties.

I had a few people drop out even my own sister. I didn't even care or worry. I just replaced them. 4 in total and it's 10 in all. The very next day I was replacing. It happens alot. Not just you. Matter of fact I had to change my church. Change my invitations. Change my bridemaids dress cause Alfred Angelo went out of business. You have to roll with the punches. I'm more then sure the day of my wedding something will go wrong. I've become a pro at not letting anything bother me

Ah yes, nothing says friendship like replacing your bridesmaids.

Will everyone be out of college by your wedding? If so I would suggest holding off on setting your bridal party until after they all have jobs. I think it is stressful to ask them so soon when they are in college. You have plenty of time.

Maybe the fact they had to talk about it so far in advance gave them cold feet. The idea that wow we have to discuss hair, makeup, and dresses for nearly two years may have been too much. Put the brakes on and visit in a year. They may not even be your best buds then or have moved for jobs...

Does she have a good reason to drop out? You have over 2 years away still. Idk if I would've asked my girls that far out. Relationships change over that long of a time frame.

I asked mine a year out and regretted it. Luckily everything has worked out and my bridal party is perfect but if I could do it again, I would have asked 8 months out at least