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Melissa
Just Said Yes May 2018

Jack and Jill

Melissa, on November 3, 2017 at 9:10 PM

Posted in Planning 84

has anyone done this before?? my coworker is doing one. she said that its basically a coed bridal shower and ppl buy tickets to it and you can raffle stuff off. like if my bridesmaids made baskets or something. its suppose to be a way to help pay for your wedding. has anyone done this before and how...

Has anyone done this before?? my coworker is doing one. she said that its basically a coed bridal shower and ppl buy tickets to it and you can raffle stuff off. like if my bridesmaids made baskets or something. its suppose to be a way to help pay for your wedding. has anyone done this before and how did it go??

84 Comments

  • Nicole
    Expert September 2018
    Nicole ·
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    Lots of us have kids, and student debt, and medical bills and a thousand other reasons we shouldn't have any money for a wedding. Still not an excuse, darling.

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  • Mrsbdg
    Champion August 2017
    Mrsbdg ·
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    Why not elope if you can't afford a wedding??

    My DH and I have been in school since we met. We had an extremely tight budget and still managed to not pass the cost onto my guests.

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  • Jaimee
    Master October 2019
    Jaimee ·
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    @O&S's comment making me break out the Spiderman meme files tonight...


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  • Celia Milton
    Celia Milton ·
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    You don't 'raise money' for a wedding.

    You pay for it.

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  • Jaimee
    Master October 2019
    Jaimee ·
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    @O&S, I see your stripper pug in a tutu and raise you this!


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  • Melissa
    Just Said Yes May 2018
    Melissa ·
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    I do think $60 is too much i was only gonna do $20 and have my friends and bridesmaids make baskets to raffle off, that is it.

    i am not too young to get married, i chose to have kids young because i wanted to start a family

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  • Celia Milton
    Celia Milton ·
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    Melissa; you're not listening.

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  • Mrsbdg
    Champion August 2017
    Mrsbdg ·
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    You don't raise money for a wedding. You aren't a charity.

    Please just elope. Pleaseeeeee elope. Please don't have a wedding you can't afford.

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  • Nikki
    Devoted October 2018
    Nikki ·
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    I'm 21 and have a kid. We were graciously gifted some money for a wedding but we have and are saving for the rest. We found ways to save without compromising our guests comfort. We are keeping our guest list under 100, we're using an amazing bbq to cater ($12/pp), our venue includes rentals, dj, decorations, and is ceremony and reception, and getting married on a sunday. We are still having a semi open bar (wine and beer). I sat down and decided what was really important to me and what I could live without like a cheaper dress and a smaller flower budget. I know it might feel like people are piling on you but really you are getting the best advice you can here. Cut your guest list, decide other areas to cut corners that aren't sacrificing your guests, and don't ever ask for money from people who are coming to a party (which is what a wedding is) that you are hosting.

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  • Melinda
    Super August 2018
    Melinda ·
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    You can't be serious.... you have the wedding you can afford whether that means living in reality and having a very small wedding or waiting even longer and saving. You do not push the expense upon others and based on your other post still end up hosting them poorly.

    My FH and I have been engaged for 10 years. Yep, that's not a typo, 10 f'in years. And we had our son when I was 16 years old. I was in the same exact financial situation but it never even crossed my mind to throw a money grabbing party to try to fund the wedding I couldn't afford. Instead we reevaluated what was important, bought a house first, saved (gasp), and are still choosing to elope/destination wedding with just our son, parents and two best friends.

    UGH

    Edited: wording

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  • Nicole
    Expert September 2018
    Nicole ·
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    Wedding Wire - MELISSA NOOOO

    Melissa - MELISSA YAAASSSSS

    I'm going to bed.

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  • Jaimee
    Master October 2019
    Jaimee ·
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    $60 is $60 too much, just like $20 is $20 too much.

    Your bridesmaids are not required to make baskets. You shouldn't be raffling off anything.

    First and foremost, you shouldn't be hosting this. This is a party in you and your FH's honor, therefore someone else should be hosting it.

    Second, your bridesmaids only need to purchase the agreed upon dress and show up to the wedding. They should not be making raffle baskets.

    NO ONE should be making raffle baskets because your wedding is not a fundraiser.

    No one said you were too young to get married, so not sure why that was mentioned.

    What WAS mentioned is that you don't have money saved for the wedding. You want others to fund your wedding for you.

    This is NOT okay.

    If someone wants to help, they will offer.

    If someone does not offer, it is NOT okay to ask them or find ways to get money from them, such as a cover charge or raffle.

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  • Leila
    Super October 2017
    Leila ·
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    Clearly OP doesn't get it... ce la vie

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  • The Bride
    VIP May 2017
    The Bride ·
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    You don't see any problem with outright asking people to help pay for your wedding? None at all? And you think they'd be ok with this? I can't believe it. Are you going to ask for handouts when you want to buy a house or car, too? Because part of adulting is paying for your own life.

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  • MDEasternShoreBride
    VIP October 2017
    MDEasternShoreBride ·
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    Here for the memes...

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  • Melissa
    Just Said Yes May 2018
    Melissa ·
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    Kristin, i am asking bridesmaids and friends to make baskets for the raffle. any theme they want

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  • Kasey
    Dedicated August 2018
    Kasey ·
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    *makes people pay to come to a shower, makes other people pay to make the prizes*


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  • Melissa
    Just Said Yes May 2018
    Melissa ·
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    Obviously i will ask my bridesmaids if they would mind making a basket. if they dont want to then its not a big deal

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  • Leila
    Super October 2017
    Leila ·
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    Stop fueling the fire !!! OP is gonna do what she wants!!!!

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  • Mrsbdg
    Champion August 2017
    Mrsbdg ·
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    I'm curious. Will you register for gifts too? So like, are guests coming to this with the expectation of a shower (bringing gifts) AND being paying to get in AND paying for their own drinks?

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