Is it okay to not have an open bar?

The way I look at it is, spend your budget on what's most important to you for YOUR wedding day. I could have open bar and cut back on food/cocktail hour but what's more important? Drinks or a great variety of food? Some people don't have a huge budget to have open bar. Don't let anyone make you feel you have to have one

Mandigurl, you did state "in the USA mostly", so you were generalizing what you have seen in your region of Nova Scotia to your entire country. There are lots of venues that offer per person bar and food packages outside of the US. And offering your guests alcoholic beverages without making them pay for it does not mean they will be "drinking you into the poor house". It's called budgeting properly and hosting what you can afford. It also doesn't make getting drunk the focus of the celebration. They are still there to celebrate your wedding; that does not change. Lastly, no one here is being rude. People are giving opinions. You are the one being defensive and taking offense to opinions that don't line up with your own.

Also... if I was attending a wedding with a cash bar I probably wouldn't give you as much money as a wedding gift. I would keep in mind that I would need money to pay for drinks.

No one is saying she or anyone NEEDS to have an open bar. Do a limited one, or no bar at all and put iced tea and/or wine on the tables. But to make someone pay for something you invited them to is crazy. Why is a wedding any different from a BBQ, birthday party or family reunion? Do you make people pay for stuff at those events? Like come on now.

And just because something is tolerated and it's done often, doesn't mean it's accepted.

@AugustBride they ask a question, and get mad when they get opposing opinions LOL. I only care when you present the situation. "What are your thoughts on this." You asked, we answered, get over it!

It's fine. It is always OK to host the party you can afford, as long as you supply basic necessities (food and some sort of beverage). If your guests have a beef with what *kind* of beverage, that's on them, not you.

I also thought of having a couple of Keurigs at my wedding! Have k-cups for hot chocolate, hot tea, and coffee. My fw disagrees, says the k-cups are too expensive. I buy my k-cups in bulk at $60 for 92 k-cups. I'm more afraid of them being broken though..lol

The people asking the question get mad? Please re-read your post and think about the real person who's getting mad ... hahaha. Why do you worry so much over a wedding you're not invited to? :-D

Maybe we need a new topic called... WW forum wars! lmao... Entertaining to say the least.

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On the flip side of that, nobody is saying that guests are required to buy alcoholic drinks. As long as there is something to drink provided, anything the guest wants beyond that is up to them. Just because you do not find something acceptable, doesn't mean others don't. I don't think it's the answers or opinions that people get upset about, but rather the tone and words used to present some those opinions. In my opinion, saying "that's tacky" is comparable to telling someone "that's a stupid idea". Sounds harsh, right?

I think some people forget that they are invited guests, and that they are there to celebrate the couple getting married. The event is not for them, it's for the bride and groom. Be grateful that someone cares enough about you to want you there to share in their big day.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: cash bars are the least of my concerns when attending a wedding. However, if a friend invited you to a party, would you be affronted if they expected you to pay for your alcoholic beverages? If it's rude there, it's rude at a wedding reception. One is just a larger, fancier party.

For those saying you are doing it to prevent alcoholics from imbibing, just shut up right now and stop fooling yourselves, seriously. You aren't their babysitter. And they are grown-ass adults.

Angie- its much easier to rent the big coffee things than to have Keurigs. I was just at a shower where the coffee maker was a Keurig and it just took way too long to get a cup of coffee. At a friend's wedding they had a DIY coffee bar that was so cute. Three big brewers with regular, decaf and then the bride's favorite french vanilla. They had a few Monin Syrups (you can get them at BBB) and some different creamers. It was fun! Also you can make a keg cover yourself to jazz it up!

@Angie - idk if this helps at all but this is the idea behind what im doing. its going to be this same concept except just cleaned up and more manicured.

@AugustBride,, who's worrying about anything? I'm giving my opinion because it was asked. Why are you so worried about what we think? You had your strong opinion about what kind of invitations I should purchase and what we should do with our money. Now it's different? Girl bye...

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The wedding is for you and FH, but the reception is to thank your guests for coming, so yes, it is about them. It stops being your "big/special day" just for you, when you invite guests, thus you must be a good host and anything less than that is unacceptable in any situation, in any culture and/or geographic location.

@Koch... The reason for the keurigs is because I can get 2 of them for free... one mine and one my fmil's. Either way, coffee or Keurigs, you have to have the sugar, the creamer, caffeinated, decaffeinated and the cups to put it in. I drink my coffee black and forgot all about all the extra stuff. One of the biggest reasons for the keurig was for the hot chocolate... something for the kids to drink. I may end up doing Juice boxes or something for them instead. It's probably going to be a hot day with it being the 1st day of August.

@Kristen: I have seen that many times, which was why I said something not looking "rustic" lol. I actually LOVE it... but maybe painting it would be an awesome Idea!

I think it really depends on your group of people. For example, the majority of my guests drink wine/beer versus hard liquor, while I am sure that some do enjoy the heavier stuff, FW and I decided that beer, wine and signature cocktail will do. As much as it is a celebration of you and your FH it is also your guest's time and money.

My advice is to do what you can afford, whether its one type of beer, one red and one white. I am even skipping the champagne and using moscato (you can also sub Perseco which you can get cheap!).

Exactly @Emmy, you aren't doing me any favors by having me dress up, leave my kid, spend money on a gift, money on gas and/or plane tickets, hotel rooms, inviting me to your wedding. Are you serious right now? Is that how couples really think when it comes to their wedding? WOW.

They are INVITED guest, not wedding crashers. Treat them as such.

QueenB - I never said you can't have an opinion. Feel free to give your opinion. I just think it's silly to get so heated, angry, and snippy over cash bars vs. open bars. I personally would never have a cash bar at my wedding either, but it's not my wedding.