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Just Said Yes June 2012

invitation wording for no gifts

Malinda, on January 16, 2012 at 6:42 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 13

We are older so we don't need gifts but we have chose a charity that we would like people to donate to instead of giving a gift how do you word that without sounding rude?

13 Comments

Latest activity by Kimberly, on January 17, 2012 at 2:30 PM
  • K
    Beginner March 2012
    Kara ·
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    Easy - you don't include it on the invitation. If you want people to have that info, you tell your parents and friends informally and maybe put it on your info Web site.

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  • Hayley C™
    Master March 2008
    Hayley C™ ·
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    I agree with Kara.

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  • NowMissyL
    VIP May 2012
    NowMissyL ·
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    Agree with Kara.

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  • ashlee
    Master January 2012
    ashlee ·
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    First of all -- registries and / or gifts are never mentioned on the wedding invitation. assuming you mean website or via family -- which is fine... simply say, in lieu of gifts the couple respectfully requests a donation in their name to any of the following charitable organizations....

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  • Franchesca
    Expert March 2012
    Franchesca ·
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    Well here is what we put on a little cute card : People are asking for our gift registry, well honestly speaking we decided not to have a gift registry. however there will be a wishing well at the venue in which we would love to recive your envelope with a monetary gift enclosed. after paceing your envelope in the wishing well please make a wisk for us for it to come true.

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  • Franchesca
    Expert March 2012
    Franchesca ·
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    Some may not agress and that is fine. remember it is your Day. Everybody does things diffrent and i don't see nothing wrong with asking for Monetary gifts. I've been to plenty weddings and I never got offended.

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  • Franchesca
    Expert March 2012
    Franchesca ·
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    By the way your getting married on my birthday #TEAMCANCER!!!!!

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  • Celia Milton
    Celia Milton ·
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    It's wrong. Period. (Asking for monetary gifts....cute card or not.) Word of mouth is the best way to get the word out that you do not want gifts, but if someone DOES want to honor your marriage, they can donate to a charity.

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  • Jennifer
    VIP May 2012
    Jennifer ·
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    Which part are you saying is wrong celia? The actual putting in the envelope and asking, or the wanting mone vs gifts in the first place?

    Because if its the want money in the first place part I 100% disagree. It depends on the guests and the norms of the people attending. Italian weddings up here are 100% cash gifts, there is a GIANT card box and everyone brings cash. It is very normal here to bring cash instead of gifts and I have never ever given a wedding "present". I have discussed this issue with many people in my life, friends, co-workers and family, and I think only 1 person has expressed that they thought it was weird to want money not gifts, and they were 90. lmao

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  • Franchesca
    Expert March 2012
    Franchesca ·
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    Jennifer N. I agree i have never and i'am not going to start now. besides no one i invited to" MY" day had or has a problem they understand and that is what it is. tuff cookies to who don't like it. people get so caught up they for get on what they feel is rite or what is wrong. if your comming to my wedding you already know what the deal is.

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  • krisalicious
    Master April 2012
    krisalicious ·
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    I agree it depends on your culture....but I think usually when people have to ask whether or not something is a bad idea, it usually means that it is. If it's ingrained in your culture, like Franchesca and Jennifer are saying, you don't think twice about it.

    I do think there's a difference between having a card box and telling people outright to bring money so they can add to it. But that's just me.

    I think the other thing is that charities can be oddly controversial. Just know your audience. I agree with the girls who said word of mouth/website would be your best bet here, and leave all mention off gifts out of the invitation.

    Personally- I would still create a small physical registry. Registries really help out your guests who want to give you a boxed gift....it's almost more for them than it is for you. But again, that's just me.

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  • Katie Bug
    Super June 2012
    Katie Bug ·
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    Amen @Kris S

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  • Kimberly
    Dedicated June 2012
    Kimberly ·
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    I have been wondering the same thing. We have both been married before and have homes. We really don't need any small appliances. We have been trying to figure out how to discourage people from getting us a bunch of gifts we don't need. However, we will have a wishing well at the reception. Whatever is given we will appreciate, even if it's another toaster, lol!!

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