i told the bride i can't come to her bachelorette party because I'm an alcoholic.

I can’t relate but you did what you feel is the right thing for YOU and that’s the most important thing of all. If the bride can’t see that you are protecting yourself and your recent sobriety, that’s on her not you. A bachelorette party is going to be far more alcohol-focused than a wedding so I can understand your decision.

Are you still planning to go to the wedding?

It's brave of you to recognize the issue and take it on full force. Give the bride a bit of time to let it sink in. I hope she realizes that what you are doing is what you have to do. Your sobriety is so young that putting yourself in a situation such as a bachelorette party in a bar is just asking for a relapse. If she doesn't understand, that shows a weakness and lack of caring on her part. If this ends your friendship, you are the one who will better off and it will only point out how unfeeling and self absorbed the bride is.

Best of luck on your recovery. I do hope you are going to support meetings. You need guidance from people who have been where you are at now.

You are absolutely doing the right thing. Your recovery and your health are more important than her bachelorette party. The bride should be supporting you, not giving you the silent treatment. The wedding and the bachelorette are very different. At a bachelorette, drinking is usually the central focus. That is not the case at a wedding. If she can't understand that, she is a little dense. In any case, perhaps, she is just processing this at the moment and will come around. Hopefully, this will not turn into the loss of a friendship. If it does, she was not worth your friendship to begin with. Keep us updated!

She can be disappointed, it is natural, and if she is a good friend she is probably really worried about you as well. Maybe that is why she is taking so long to respond? Maybe she is worried or doesn't know what to say? You did the right thing and took a HUGE step forward by admitting you have a problem. This will not be an overnight transformation, and you need to do whatever is necessary to work through these issues and stay sober. If she is a true friend she will get over her disappointment and be grateful that her friend is taking care of herself. This is not exactly the same, but I have a good friend who has been suffering with crippling depression, and anxiety. She is really ill, and for the past year she hasn't been a part of my life very much, and hasn't been involved in the wedding at all. I am sad, I had hoped she would be there, and it hurts me that she hasn't been. But i understand that it is not her fault, she is not doing it on purpose and she is not doing it to hurt me, she is battling something insanely difficult, and she needs to do whatever she can to get healthy. So I get a little sad, and then I push it away and remember that she is my friend and she is in pain, and her wellbeing and health have to come first. I hope once your friend has time to digest everything she will see that too and be supportive.

As someone in sobriety - congratulations and it is really is a one day at a time, one minute at a time in the beginning. I do understand. Your friend was probably taken aback and perhaps felt embarrassed she put you in that position? You have to put your health first and good for you for realizing this. I hope she comes around and thinks of you and your health.

Best wishes and good luck on this journey.

Congratulations on two weeks sober! When I was quitting drinking I didn't go to anything like a party for four or five months--I couldn't take the risk. People were very understanding and supportive, but they'd been watching me kill myself with alcohol for a long time.

Absolutely do what you need to do to stay sober. Take no risks. Don't give in to pressure from people who don't understand. Your sobriety is the only important thing right now; everything else depends on it forever.

And it gets easier, though don't ever let yourself become overconfident.

You definitely did the right thing. Like someone else said, she could still be processing everything.
It is more than "just not drinking" too. It's good that you're not putting yourself in a situation where you could be triggered to relapse, especially since it's still early in sobriety. It takes a lot to be able to do that. And hopefully your friend will be supportive of you in this situation. Definitely keep it up. You got this.

First of all kudos to you for realizing you have a problem and taking the steps to get better. My dad is 22 years sober and it is not an easy thing to do. That being said you need to, especially this early in your journey to sobriety, stay away from situations that may trigger a relapse. You made the right decision and if the bride can't get over herself and see that, she is not a true friend, it is not as easy as to just "not drink" you are fighting an addiction, not just a "oh well darn that drink looks good, but I shouldn't" it's not that easy.

Stay STRONG you can do this! You can beat this!!! I would also recommend finding a local AA meeting, they helped my dad through the ups and downs, and I'm sure they can help you too!!!! SENDING LOVE AND PRAYERS YOUR WAY!!!!