I know everyone thinks it's tacky but...

@OGKatheryn: Pretty much. She didn't see how we could possibly be engaged since we're all bullies.

Yes. We are the bullies, yet not one of us has called a name or used a personal attack.

I have actually read several articles from the UK (no I am not from there, nor have I been there so I'm going off of what I've seen repeatedly) that find the idea of American registries bizarre and very rude and that money poems are incredibly common. So, maybe, just maybe it is a regional thing. Who knows? I know that I would never be that judgy to any event that I was invited to. To judge someone that invited me to their special day, to me, would be incredibly rude. I have the option to contribute or not to, simple as that. Just like if I don't like a song on the radio, I can change the station, without feeling personally slighted that they played a song I didn't happen to like.

MsMRose -

I will absolutely judge someone who writes a poem that would make TS Eliot roll over in his grave.

Then hopefully rise from it, and kill them, for killing the English language.

@MRose: THAT example would be cultural. The UK has a totally different culture from the US. Regional would be from city to city or state to state.

It has been admitted several times in the past that there are always cultural exceptions to things, BUT the great majority of the forum users here are from North America, and therefore those cultural differences TYPICALLY don't apply.

Most countries redirect users to a website's version for their own country if it's available. I would be shocked if there wasn't a UK/European version of WW.

@Ms. MRose-

You said, "I have the option to contribute or not to, simple as that. Just like if I don't like a song on the radio, I can change the station, without feeling personally slighted that they played a song I didn't happen to like."

I like that perspective.

Yeah, except the song isn't charging me to listen.

No one is "charging" anything. You have the option to give a gift, it is not a requirement in any way, shape, or form

I give up.

Honeyfunds, etc., may very well be rude or tacky, but I have never been to a wedding that I was told I HAD to contribute to one.

First, I am on the side of "it is tacky" when it comes to Honeyfunds.

Second, while guests are trusted, it doesn't take long for someone (who is not invited) to walk in the room, looks like the belong, pick up gifts or a card box, and leave with it, without anyone noticing. Criminals know how to do that...it is their profession.

Third, have a trusted friend watch over your gift table and do not put the gift table near the entrance to the venue. Put it in a place where someone would have to come all the way in to the room to take anything.

All registries are tacky, including gift registries and especially those with requests for hobby items and "updates".

Ultimately whatever you decide to do, expressing yourself with humility and gratitude is key. Technically it's tacky to ask for any kind of gift, even though they are traditionally given and registries are appreciated by most guests because they do not want to give you things that you can't use, hate or do not want.

Anyway, this is your wedding and it's your decision. You know your people better than anyone else on here. If you think they would feel offended by a honeyfund then don't do it and don't register for anything...people will get the hint. If they would love to be a part of your honeymoon, then go for it and set it up! Make sure you post plenty of pictures and thank you's to show everyone how awesome your honeymoon was though

I got it! security tags inside the card boxes with security sensors at the exits. Boom problem solved.

I would also like to say that my brother registered for a honeymoon and set it up as people buying them dinners and hotel rooms and tours and such. I thought it was super cute and fun, but they had a lot less people give them a gift than they expected (like less than half of their guests). Not sure if it's because they asked for a honeymoon or if they just have poor guest etiquette...they hosted a very nice wedding and reception too.

@Jordyn-I have been a bartender at several weddings. 1) You normally don't get paid or tipped out until the end of the wedding. 2) Often the cardbox is placed near the bar so that someone is always keeping an eye on it. I have, and none of the other staff I have worked with have ever thought of stealing those cards or monies. 3) Your bar staff is usually run off their fret and don't have time to think about stealing your gifts.

The most likely culprits who would steal your cards (if it were to happen) would be a wedding crasher, or someone you know. It would not be someone risking their reputation and livelihoods to steal a couple of hundred dollars.

@Joanne: The one with poor etiquette was the one with the Honeyfund.

Not sure I'd ever consider a honeyfund, but I do have a comment regarding the cards... My cousins wedding was gorgeous, it turned out to be a perfect night. She spent a pretty penny on everything. My mom being the protective aunt that she is watched out for little things the bride may not notice.. One being the card box. My mom went to two of the girls that worked for the venue and said "are you going to be by the door all night? because the card box is just around the corner" they said yes we are, we plan to watch it ... unfortunately when the bride got home, she had just a handful of cards.... There were over 250 there... So she assumed something was wrong.. Venue did not do a good job watching it (I guess its not technically their job anyways) but she also had a card 'box' that was easy to access.. It was a bird cage.. so pretty simple to reach and go when everyone is on the dance floor...

As someone said earlier, not to invited people you think might steal, but in all honesty, I've never met significant others to my FH family members... We gave them a plus one to be nice... they could be awful humans. You just never know...

After attending that wedding.... Knowing a lot of people there will be at my wedding.... I'm having my dad build my card box, the only way to open it will be by taking it completely apart...

I suppose theoretically the possibility of theft has existed throughout the history of wedding gifts and people have dealt with it in other ways than setting up a virtual moneyfund.

I'm not personally offended by them, though I'm definitely not doing one, but I think the "theft possibility" excuse is not particularly valid.

WHY ARE YOU BUMPING A 5 DAY OLD POST?! LET IT DIE..

What the fuck? Why is this alive?