How to tell Dad I want to walk down the aisle alone

We are in the same boat! My father has not really been there and I will feel terrible allowing him to have this moment when he doesn't deserve it. I want my brother to walk me down the isle! I do feel a tad guilty because I don't want to hurt him BUT I don't want to feel like a fraud on our day either and my brother has really been more of a dad to us in terms of emotional availability! We are getting married in the DR I doubt he will show up so that makes it easier but if he does...IDK how I will do it. So, I'm no help with the question but wanted you to know you're not alone!

I want to walk down alone also. I'm sort of in the same situation, but our relationship has been alot better lately. However, he defied tradition when he kicked me out of the house (it is in my opinion that daughters should be allowed to live at home until either they go away to college or get married, and should be allowed to return home in the case of a divorce or job loss; this is just MY opinion, no one get mad, k), and also, he hasn't offered to pay for any of the wedding (another traditional custom), so why should he be able to take advantage of the tradition of walking me down the aisle (or in my case, up to the boat)? I am just going to break it to him if he asks, if he doesnt, I will just show him where he will be watching the ceremony from, kindly of course. He is my dad and I do love him, and will even share the tradition of father daughter dance with him.

Just tell him that you want to walk alone. Not that you guys are not close or anything(for the sake of his feelings) and that you look at walking own the aisle as an intimate moment between you and FH when you just gaze into each others eyes as you make your way to him.

My daughter is in the same predicament...your story is very much the same. My daughters said "you can't give something away that you never owned". She asked me to walk her down the isle of which will be an honor. She is very close with my current husband and would like for both of us to walk her down the aisle however she does not want to hurt her fathers feelings. She will be splitting the father daughter dance in half to respect her father and honor her stepfather of which I think is a wonderful compromise however she hasn't informed her father of any of this yet!

Leah, I like what you are saying. Why is it when these occasions take place people tend to act a little fake, sweeping the reality of situations under the rug. Good for you for standing up for yourself and walking alone! If anyone has a problem with it remind them that it is not about them. It is only about you and your FH, be true to you!

If you "don't know how to tell him", then you're still worried about hurting his feelings. If this is really the case, then ask him. You won't regret it later in life. This is called "taking the high road". And, you're keeping the "door open" for the future.

If, on the other hand, you REALLY don't care, then just tell him he's only a guest, and let it go. He'll work it out by himself. But, keep in mind that you are "closing the door" forever.

I had a similar issue, I wanted my stepdad not my real dad. I sat down and told my real dad, I also asked that my real dad give a speech at the wedding (to soften the blow). It didn't affect our relationship and he understood. I say communication is definitely the key. You could also make something up, like you think it's old fashioned and you're a "modern" bride and don't want any to give you away?