How much is too much to spend on a bachelorette party?

Why is the bride planning her own bachelorette? Did she ask everyone what they could spend before deciding?

Nope, people need to realize that money is a finite thing. I am going back to my hometown with one bm for mine to save the cost for the majority. And we are driving and staying at my parents place. I felt bad asking her to take a day off work.

No, she did not. She made a Facebook group telling us what we would be doing. She actually booked the hotel already without a final headcount...

Yuck. Don't spend what you can't afford to. She may be pissed, but you have to think realistically with your finances.

Wow. If she is planning her Bach party, then she needs to pay for it....you can't just say, "hey everyone! You 5 are going to pay for me to go to Vegas because !" Hell no! Tell her she can honeymoon there on her own dime!

Where is this destination Bach party ???

Savannah is the destination.

Honestly, when it comes to a bach, I'm not keen on the whole destination deal. I'd say $40-- so, basically dinner, is about all I want to spend.

I'd honestly let her know you can't afford whatever she's planning and ask if you can ask each girl individually what they can afford and see if you can come up with something that suits everyone's budget. or just suck it up and not go.

As much as I'd love for all my girls to be at all my Bach, i know they can't all afford it. And no I haven;t planned my own bach.

Don't feel guilty about passing! She was inconsiderate to pick a location without asking about yalls budget.

I've told her a few times now that I was worried about how expensive the flights are, but she's dismissed it every time saying she's sure they'll drop. I've also told the MOH I haven't booked a flight because they are too expensive. Maybe I haven't been clear enough?

Honestly you travelled more than most would for this wedding. If I were her I would be grateful for all that you have done and whereas I would want you there I would understand why you couldn't be

When is supposed to be and where are you flying from? Rates don't always drop.

Flying from Dallas! And it's the beginning of December.

IMHO that's a lot...You flew out for her Engagement party, Bridal shower...and will be flying out for the wedding....And now she's scheduled a destination bachelorette party?

That's a lot of money on flights alone.

If you can afford it, then by all means I would say go for it. But if you can't, I'd say have a talk with her and let her know your situation...hopefully she'll be okay with that.

That totally sucks but it's entirely the brides issue, not yours. I get that you want to be there for your friend but that is rediculous

Chances are prices won't drop since that's the holiday season. I'd just be honest with her.

No I was the same as you- I flew for engagement party, shower and wedding. She had the bachelorette local to HER but I was the only BM out of state. Since we were all (literally...no really) teachers and the wedding was in July, I asked if they'd consider doing the bachelorette the Monday or Tuesday night before the Friday wedding but they said no. That's ok- but I wasn't purchasing a 4th flight fare. No hard feelings! There shouldn't be on your end either. That's what happens with "destination" things or OOT BMs!

I couldn't pull that off right now, I'd send regrets.

You shouldn't feel bad at all. You're already doing a lot and flights/hotel accomodations aren't cheap!

You aren't a horrible person if you can't go. You've already been an awesome friend by attending all the other things. Just be honest with her.