How do I take back my RSVP? I don't want to go to a Dry wedding!

If you value the friendship, you should go.

My wedding will be dry. 1. My vendor isn't licensed for booze. 2. There's a bar LITERALLY sharing a wall next door. 3. There's only 10 minutes between the ceremony and reception. 4. Everyone is driving in and driving home. We have no interest in being sued for your DUI. Sorry not sorry.

^^^ ughhh HUGE eye roll

^^^^oh well.

Omg hope. Aren't you special. I hope that you enjoy your wedding where everyone leaves and sits in the bar and you stand there cause you are too cheap to provide booze. Also sad that not one of your friends isn't able make adult decisions like not drinking and driving. Have you thought of finding a different venue?

Small flask, and many bathroom breaks! you wouldn't want the others to see! They'd tackle you for it!!!

@hope-people are adults. Let them adult. Sorry not sorry.

Helena, my guests can walk 20 feet to the bar. I should feel bad as they leave their kids behind to drink? OK.

Every single guest has children there? Then they will tag team it But I have been to a wedding where they served beer and wine and everything had to be bought at the bar. So our whole table went to the bar. Didn't ever head back to the wedding. As did about 80% of guests. By the way is your venue not LaScala? Cause according to reviews they have amazing bartenders. Don't be cheap. Properly host your guests. That would be like saying come to my wedding, but there is a restaurant next door, so I don't have to feed my guests

I'm here you guys! And boy do I have updates I'll write a thread tomorrow. But I came to the ceremony ended about an hour ago and we weren't allowed in the reception room the brides uncle came prepared and had a cooler in his trunk with pre mixed drinks and booze. But security came and shut that down but he was kind enough to point us in the direction of a bar within walking distance. that's where all the guest are, we're leaving for the reception now.

How far is the walk to the bar? That may be your answer!

I def get that a dry wedding is not the most ideal. However I think it's is beyond rude to "go for a free meal". A wedding is about two people being in love and celebrating it. There are different reasons people have dry weddings. It usually is price but there are people that just don't drink and it's not important to them. I was just at a dry wedding and I had a good time. People danced and had a blast. I am having an open bar and I do like drinking but I've never went to a wedding and worried about alcohol. I go because I want to support two people in love. If I was the bride and found out someone was sooo upset they couldn't drink and were just gonna eat and leave I would def have something to say about it. Just because you're having alcohol at your wedding doesn't mean it's going to be any better. You apparently don't care about these people cause you tried to justify it saying you're not that close with them so cancel and don't go. I'm sure if they knew this they wouldn't want you there anyways. I would gladly give up the money for the meals if it meant rude, inconsiderate people weren't gonna talk sh*t behind my back like my wedding was a chore and gonna be horrible and just not come.

^^^ Womp womp womp *eyeroll* ^^^

Lauren, it's not just the OP saying that. It's reality. This is truly what people think when they're not being hosted properly.

Im here for the update

Ugh Hope. Come to our wedding and not only WON"T you get a drink you have to go NEXT DOOR TO BUY it because HOPE doesn't want to be sued.

What a load of crap. Sorry. If you want to be cheap, just flat out come out and say you're too cheap to pay for it.

Lauren? It's not a FREE MEAL, okay? It's a meal you pay for with new clothes, travel, baby or dog sitting, a gift, and the gift of your time. IF you don't want to drink, then don't, but don't make that decision for the rest of us.

And yes, it truly is what people think about dry weddings. I talk to enough couples who have been to enough other weddings, and once in a blu moon they'll be invited to a dry wedding.

It's no one's favorite thing. No matter how special and beloved you are.

At least the uncle had the right idea lol.

It comes down to...they invited you and you accepted. They have likely given the caterer a head count. Would you like it if some of your guests said yes, and then didn't come and you had to pay for their meal anyways? No?

It comes down to...are they your friend, or not? They thought enough of you to invite you to a very special moment in their lives. Do you support their MARRIAGE? Their new life together?

It comes down to...every one has different ideas of "properly hosting" a social event. Just because they are not choosing to include alcohol, does not make them "wrong." It's just their way. I am vegetarian. When I host a party, or cook a meal, I don't cook dead animals. People who come to my parties know that, but they also know that they will get a gourmet meal....that doesn't include dead animals, but is thoroughly delicious and filling in its own right. When I go to weddings or other peoples' parties, I go knowing most of them are not vegetarian. I NEVER make any demands or requests. I am not entitled to get everything I want; I appreciate that they thought to include me. Most of the time, they are very thoughtful and they do provide me with something vegetarian to eat.

I just went as a guest to a wedding two weeks ago. I ate salad. That is all. Everything else had meat in it. I brought nuts, because I was hungry. I didn't make a fuss. I thanked the bride & groom for inviting me and told them it was a lovely wedding and a delicious meal and fun reception. I appreciated that I had salad to eat. They never thought about vegetarian guests, and they didn't know I left hungry. It's okay. It's THEIR way of hosting a social event. I am not an entitled person, thinking everything is about me; I am a person who is GRATEFUL they invited me to be a guest at their wedding.

A week later, I attended another wedding of a friend, and it was out of state. It cost my family a great deal of money to attend, as we had to fly, but we were thrilled that our friends thought enough of us to invite us to their destination wedding. They had a fun food truck, that wasn't fun. The head table got served dinner at 6:00 pm; our table was one of the last to be served at 9:15 pm. To say we were hungry is an understatement. But the bridal party went and tracked down some of the cocktail hour appetizers and brought them to our table; the father of the bride came and apologized (not HIS fault, we made sure that we let him know we were fine and to enjoy his evening). When we finally got our food, there was no protein on there (chicken or beef or tofu). It was basically rice and beans. But again, we didn't fuss, we appreciated that our friends thought enough of us to invite us, and thanked them again at the end of the reception for a lovely evening.

As to a wedding being dry: maybe one of them is a recovering alcoholic; maybe there is a family member or friend who is a recovering alcoholic; maybe one of them has an Aunt Susie or brother Billy who can't control their alcohol, and makes a scene. Maybe they just don't like alcohol, for religious or health reasons or even don't like the taste of it or the way it makes them feel! Maybe they can't afford the alcohol, the bartender, the security (many venues make you hire security if you serve alcohol). And if they can't afford it, or for another reason had a dry wedding, they still wanted YOU to be an honored guest at their wedding, and they are still providing a nice meal and entertainment.

I choose gratitude, rather than entitlement. I choose graciousness, over complaints. It's your choice on whether you go or not, or whether you choose to enjoy yourself or not, without alcohol being provided. They are your friend, and they'd like your love and presence and support on their wedding day. That's what it is all about.

The bullying on this thread is very sad. To each their own as to how they host their own wedding.

I don't find bullying (eye rolling, telling people it's a "load of crap" not to serve people alcohol, etc) appropriate for any reason. I won't be a bystander.

Live and let live.