Honeymoon Fund & Registry

@ Erin Wood: I agree completely. I'd rather not put cash in a card since it can't be tracked, and giving a check is a huge PITA. Many people give those visa or amex gift cards, which *gasp* add a fee. The honeyfund fee is literally so uncontroversial it's crazy.

@Anon- I don't mind putting money in a card but if there is a honeyfund option I always use it and add a few extra dollars to cover the fee. Not a big deal to me but I can see both sides. If the people really don't understand how it works they may feel like they were mislead.

I have given gifts via honeyfund. One "registry" through it was for a down payment for their first home and it also offered options to help toward decorating the living room, kitchen, bathrooms, outdoor furniture, and a selection for them to give whatever they chose. Each item/room listed was a different price varrying from 25 - 100... plus the option for whatever the giver can or wants to give.

We also decided to do this. People on this site can say we're rude because "We're asking for money" but out of the several weddings I've gone to and donated to a honeyfund for, I have yet to hear anyone complain. If I've heard anything, people were raving about how east the process was and how happy they were to be able to do something to help out.

I was really worried some of my FH family would be upset or insulted and that some of my older family members would be as well. Instead, it was the opposite and everyone has been grateful for the ease and that there won't be anything to forget when most have to travel several hours by either driving, flying, or both.

I had discussions with quite a few people before deciding to go with it and I may have decided against it had the reactions been different. I think it honestly depends on the couple and their families/friends.

Just my experiences.

I think honeymoon funds or asking for money is perfectly acceptable, but I am 23 and all of my friends are roughly the same age. I definitely think it's a sign of the times considering the people I see complaining about it are over whelming from older generations. There's nothing wrong with wanting to do stuff the traditional way, but there's equally nothing wrong with wanting to be modern. My favorite part about cash gifts is that I can give whatever I have. Maybe I can't afford your towels or appliances, but I can give $20 and I won't feel bad because I got you exactly what you wanted.

The one thing about this whole situation that I have a problem with and even been said here is the argument "well I haven't been on a vacation in x years so why should I pay for yours???!?" First off, what you do with your personal life is not my problem and do not force your choices on me. My idea of a vacation is a day off relaxing. For our honeymoon, FH and I are roadtripping up the California coast and camping along the way for two weeks. We already have it planned out and it'll be $1,000 WITH incidentals added just in case of car issues. If you think every vacation has to have lavish resorts and 5 star dinners, that's your prerogative but not everyone thinks that way. Secondly, that argument is holier than Swiss cheese. I can say "well I don't have Egyptian cotton sheets so why should I buy them for you" or "I can't afford a food processor for myself so I'm not buying one for you." Before anyone says "but you don't have to buy a gift, just give cash" that's the exact end result of just asking for cash, but without beating around the bush.

Jessica B, for only bring 23 you seem like one of the most mature people on here and I sincerely mean that. Thank you for your point of view and thank you for how intelligently you put it.