HELP! Guests aren't sending their RSVP's & the dealine is in 2 days!!!!!

Wow that really sucks,but if they don't rsvp and you have no way of contacting them consider them not coming.I mean seriously how hard is it to drop the card in the mail.

Hmmm... well since you have no way of contacting them those would be NOs, not maybes. Maybe you could send out a "we will miss seeing you on our day" notes or something like that so people get the hint that they're not coming. Cuz you obviously have no other way of doing it (the preferred method would def. be to call them)..... having 70 people just randomly show up to your wedding the day of just isn't an option

I know exactly what you mean for my wedding we had like 40 non responces people called like a week before asking if they can come and the day of! Thankfully none of them did come. I know how stressfull and irritating this is. Some of them even called my mil and asked if they could still come and she told them yes even though i had my number on the rsvp card come on now. just give it some more time.

I knew there were going to be people either not returning them or turning them in late ... that's why I put my date early so that I would have time to try and get in touch with everyone before the final headcount was due. Hope it all works out for you. My RSVP date was Jan 8th. and I'm still waiting to hear from 6 people but I had to track down a bunch of people.

I am thinking like you, but our deadline is Feb. I had sent them out the second week of January and they are coming in very slowly. Everyone already knew it a head of time. After my deadline I am not accepting any RSVP and I told them that. My guest list is 161 people and so far about 37 only RSVP. Come on people get them in.

Well, we don't have to give the final count in to the Reception hall until 10 days before the Wedding which is 3 more weeks... But I can't stand when people wait until the LAST MINUTE... Thankfully, we met our "minimum" with yesterdays RSVP's, so I don't have to worry about not having enough people... But my whole problem is if you know you're not gonna go, then why can't you just check on "not able to attend" and send the friggin thing back ?!? Then we could have invited other FRIENDS of ours that we had to eliminate from the list because YOU took their spot on the guest list! Now it's too late to invite any friends because they'll say "B-List ?!? NO THANKS!"... I'm curious as to how many we're going to get today and tomorrow now... With the way things have been going, probably about 15 UGH I'm going straight to the Yellow Pages tomorrow! Verizon's gonna LOVE me LOL My dad thinks people got them confused with Christmas cards, but EVERYONE got Save-The-Dates last MAY! COME ON PEOPLE!

I got a good idea. Go to white pages online. Since you do have their mailing address you can find them and it might provide their phone numbers as well.

Oops... I meant to say White Pages! I'm so used to our phone book here being called the Yellow Pages LOL

Well, your best bet is the day after they're due, get on the hone yourself and demand the phone numbers or email addresses and get a calling/typing! Just say:

"Hi so and so, it's Melissa, I'm calling/writing to see if you're able to make it to the wedding. We need to get the final head count so we can give the final head count ot the caterer and create the seating chart. If we don't hear back from you by DATE, we will mark you down as not attending and we hope we can catch up after the wedding"

And if they still don't reply after that:

"sorry you're not able to make it to the wedding, we hope we can see you another time"

You can invite B-list people without them knowing they were on the B-list by calling them and saying, "I didn't receive your RSVP card and wanted to know if you were coming." Then they can say they never got it and you can blame it on the mail.

Ok well this a lil update... Guess how many RSVP's came in the mail today ?!? 1... Yeah, you read that right...*ONE*... I am BEYOND furious right now! Like I said before, we met our minimum guarantee with yesterday's RSVP's... So therefore, I am about to tell EVERYONE that sends theirs in AFTER tomorrow "SORRY, TOO LATE!"... The teacher (going to school to be one) in me is about to come out! I can't wait until FH gets out of work so I can tell him this one... He is gonna FLIP OUT, which is VERY rare of him to do... This is starting to get a little ridiculous now! 1 day until the deadline & 69 RSVP's still missing!

Schmidt - Great script... I will definitely use it... Thanks!

I would try to call who I could, as for your parents friends I would leave that to them. In a few days just count all no responses as declines. It is pretty sad that so many people put it off (forget about it) so long. When I get an invite the responce is in the mail the next day. I can't see why it is so hard.

Ok so I just spent the last 2 hours making phone calls to my side of the non-responders. I heard apology after apology to those that answered & I left messages for those that didn't. I was able to get responses from about 9, then there were 3 that I was already told through text or phone calls but was just waiting on the RSVP cards, along with 1 that actually called me... I even told them I still want their RSVP cards, because I want everything in WRITING, so if they say yes and then don't show up for no good reason, I will then flip out... So, now we're down to about 55 to go... I will be sitting down with my FMIL tomorrow and demanding she gives me everyone's phone number that didn't send theirs in yet... I'm telling everyone that we have to give the final count & payment to the hall by this coming Monday... I HATE lying, but I had to because if they knew we had until the 17th, they would wait until the 16th to mail them out... Thanks for all the advice & I'll keep you updated :-)

Wow, you're giving me nightmares...

Here's what I know from having done this for 17 years. About 70% of those you invite will respond. Of the ones who respond, only 80% (or less) who said they'd show up, actually do.

Of your 164, you can expect about 75 to 80 to actually show up.

I really think it depends on your family... for example... pretty much everyone who we have invited (minus a few people we know can't come) are 99% likely to show up... maybe it has to deal with the economy and the fact that ppl are getting a free meal, but more and more people are starting to come to weddings (whether or not they RSVP)... and unfortunately there are more of the wedding crashers!!

This is very typical. There's a reasonable service out there MyRSVPLive.com that takes your guest list, tracks all your RSVP's and then calls all the non-responders and e-mails you an update every day. If I was getting married again, I would use them...or hire a wedding planner to do it. I worked at a venue and I saw brides who gave a final count of 125 and another 20 people, who were invited but never RSVP'd showed up. The kitchen scurried, two more tables were rolled out, not including chair covers and centerpieces, and they were able to help the bride. Very, very rude, but unfortunately becoming more common. Basic manners have gone away. Please raise your kids with manners or this kind of thing will never get better!

Man, screw that! That's why I'm putting notices online (and my invite) that REQUIRES them to RSVP. We're getting married on a military base...If they are not on the list, they don't get in! LOL They're more than welcome to sample the fairs at the local fast food resturants...

Wow - I just got a quote from MyRSVPlive.com

$80 for the CHEAPEST PACKAGE????!!! Never gonna happen! I would SLAP myself for wasting my wedding funds on this! You really need the most expensive package for it to be worth it...and if the cheapest is $80, the most expensive will be over $100-$150 - man, that's the cost of my dang invites!

The people who don't RSVP just don't get fed. "Poor planning on their part does NOT constitute an emergency on mine"

Well, we still haven't gotten today's mail... So we'll just have to wait until later this afternoon to see who else sent theirs is... BUT now to make it even MORE stressful, ready for this ?!? We just got our contract in the mail yesterday for the florist with the pricing information and balance due... Not only to we have to have the FULL balance paid in CASH by Monday, BUT we have to give HIM our FINAL TABLE COUNT! Which means, we need our final GUEST count in order to start our seating arrangements! And, after Monday it says we are not allowed to change the number of tables... I just read this late lastnight and now I'm even MORE stressed out! FH is going to demand his mom call their side this week, which we know she won't do because she refused for my Shower... So, he said "If she doesn't call them, I'm sending back whatever RSVP's we get after today with a note saying 'Sorry, but you missed the deadline!'"... I'M ****% FINE WITH THAT! No courtesy from us since they have none!