Etiquette rules: new users read and comment

*round of applause for Ali*

Just a side question: How many flags does it take for a member to be given a time out from WW?

MrsKatieK- if last weekend was any indication- a whole whole lot

I'm not crying because of the power of Ali's comment. That's just like an eyelash or something in my eye.

Totally, Sass. I was thinking the same thing. It's a weird culture where you can expect abuse from people that you're trying to help.

Tarnesha for employee of the year!

I am seeing so many of Tarnesha's comments as flagged........ I feel like you should only been allowed so many comments to be flagged before you are asked to leave......

Ali, you are a strong beautiful woman, who does not feel the need to attack others to feel good about herself. I appreciate you and can't imagine what you have been through in your life, Please keep being amazing!!!!!!

@lol.lol @Sasswood that's not what it is.. I thought y'all said don't sugar coat nothing

Ali, as a Veteran I understand and respect your sacrafices. I was Navy so I was not on the ground however I have lost friends as well. Some of them I have physically but mentally PTSD had taken them from me. I have spent months that turned into years away from my daughter and it was so difficult. I also have a son with sensory issues and I understand how hard things can be at home as well. You are a strong amazing and wonderful woman. I cannot change the position of some peoples heads being stuck up their ass but I can tell you I truly get it. God bless.

She defended herself. As she defends this country. What have you done to be a useful citizen lately?

Thank you for the good read.

This thread has gone down a very twisted path, but I think the point needs to be reiterated that everyone comes from a different place and therefore what is "appropriate" is different. My friends and family would be HORRIFIED by burlap at my wedding. But that doesn't mean that no one should have burlap. On the other hand, several people I know who have recently gotten married had honeyfunds in addition to a traditional registry and their friends and families expressed that they really enjoyed buying them snorkeling or dinner or whatever activity for their honeymoon because it felt more personal than writing a check. No those guests aren't obliged to buy a present or write a check, but if they want to and you don't have enough presents on your registry for everyone who wants to buy a gift because even after you upgrade everything in your one bedroom apartment, you still don't have enough to go around a 130 person wedding, they might like to get you something that feels more tangible (i.e. they know what it's nominally going toward) than just giving you cash. And if they would prefer to give you cash, guess what - that's an option! I'm always perplexed by people who say "just don't register for anything and they'll get that you want cash" ...like somehow that's better?

I'll say it more succinctly. A honeyfund for activities is no more cash grabbing than registering for presents and then having a wedding shower. Gauge the feeling among friends and family and if they don't think it's rude, go for it! How is being less materialistic a negative? Sure there are plenty of situations where it could be rude or offend some people (and I completely understand the credit card fee concerns), but a blanket rule is just absurd.

Finally a reasonable answer...

Erika- people are not actually paying for someone to go snorkeling or dinner. It's all a ruse. They just cut the couple a check. Also if someone is taking a honeymoon right after the wedding things would already need to be paid for before they leave so the money still isn't going toward the honeymoon.

Also, a registry is typically for a shower which is intended to shower the couple with GIFTS.

You know, no one who has ever had a honeyfund on here has come back to say what a great thing it was. I find that interesting.

Not sure what about my response was pissy. But name calling is against the CGs. Enjoy your flag.

Hmmm...interesting. I just looked up what Emily Post has to say....aparently honeymoon registries are fine?!?!?!

http://emilypost.com/advice/wedding-registry-etiquette/

I disagree, as I still think it's asking for money.

ETA:

Post also provides guidance on how to do a honeymoon registry. Key factors: make it one of up to three registries, do NOT include in invitation, and the final choice is always up to the giver.

http://emilypost.com/advice/inside-weddings-registry-rules/

@FutureRand waaaaaah

Oz- the honeyfund sites pay to have people like Emily post, WW, and the knot advertise for them.

Alex- you must be new here..

"My point is RIGHT. Anyone who disagrees is a paid shill!"

Not sure why you're so hostile right now. I said nothing that could be taken as offensive. I was replying to another poster in a very mature way. If you're trying to rile me up it's not going to work.