Divorce is real and it happens...

Snoring = grounds for execution in my house.

So we did the mature, but less socially acceptable thing, and divorced. Because we hadn't been together long, and had no children, it was a quick and painless process on the legal side. Emotionally, it sucked, as I had to move back to my hometown with limited cash, no job, and nowhere to live. The strength it took to start over, and the compassion I received from friends (vs the judgy crap on the divorce thread)? Well, that made me the person I am today. Happy, healthy, and remarried to a man who IS right for me. I had to screw up to make things right.

Oh, and my ex is doing exactly what he wants, too - he's a diplomat, and he's finally serving in the hot spots he couldn't volunteer for when we were married.

So, seriously, I get that nobody wants to get divorced and it's frowned upon by society. But I think most of the posts I were mostly self-righteous brides wanting to believe divorce would never happen to them.

And I hope it doesn't, because it pretty much blows.

I've said it a million times if I've said it once, if you aren't realistic with your situation and believe that life is going to be fully of roses then you are just setting yourself up for a huge crash when it turns out that you were wrong.

I know you're still adding to your post but I wanted to add my 2 cents in I agree with you... I think Andree 3000 (I know, I'm quoting a rap song) said it best when he said "If what they say is nothing lasts for ever, then what makes love the exception?" I consider myself a realist... and realisticly speaking... everything has a beginning and it has an end. I'm not foolish to think that I will stay married for the rest of my life... would i love to? cont.

Absolutely! I love my girl and would love to spend the rest of our lives together... but I know that we can't predict the future... and things change, people change and situations change.

It real. It sux rox. I wish it on no one but sometimes, like the dentist, it's a cruel necessity. We're human and we all make mistakes. The great part is, we can correct them and move on to a new chapter.

That said, DS and I are in for the long haul. We joke, "murder maybe, divorce never!" But this time around neither of us were swept off our feet or impulsive. We took care and had hours and hours of conversations about values, dreams, family, home, and strategies for keeping our marriage. We also agreed that our marriage was the top priority.

We do have our bad days, but we talk through them instead of whistling in the dark about how divorce is a terrible thing and it'll never ever ever happen to us.

Is it better that my ex and I have moved on and are happy, or should we have paid for our mistake for the rest of our lives? Before you say our divorce was petty...first tell me that YOU have never made a mistake.

I find it funny how people can say "I don't believe in divorce." Divorce exists, whether you believe it or not... just semantics I guess.

Anyway, I don't think that anyone ever goes into a marriage thinking that it may end in divorce, and if they did, why go through with it? FH and I are having serious issues right now, to the point that we almost broke up over the weekend. He is no longer the person who asked me to marry him over a year ago (which is understandable, there was a suicide in his family and things are a lot different). He/we are going to go to a counsellor and try and work things out, because obviously we still love and care about each other and want to get married. Things change though. People change. Cont.

*Applause*

Glad you posted this. It's really naive to think "it can't happen to me." And that goes for all aspects of life.

Sure, maybe some couples don't make every exhaustive effort to try to reconcile where it "could" save their marriage, but that's their business.

I think people need to work harder on their relationships before deciding to call it quits in general. I think a lot of people pick divorce too quickly (some because they picked marriage too quickly), see it as an easy way out, and that has given it a bad rap. Things change that we have no control over. People change. What you once agreed upon when you were 21 isn't necessarily how you feel at 41, 31 or even 25.

That being said, I also think people believe love to simply be a feeling. "The love is gone." No, love might be described as those mushy feelings when you are dating/in the honeymoon phase, but it's actually a verb. Sometimes you don't feel like loving someone, but you CHOOSE to love someone.

There is my neither pro nor anti divorce stance.

I don't believe in divorce. It's a conspiracy by corporate America to keep divorce lawyers in business and make people have multiple weddings so they can hawk their dresses, flowers and cakes.

Lolol, you must be joking Pumpkin...lololol

Pumpkin you are so right, this is another example of the 1%ers trying to keep the rest of us down! #OccupyCourtHouse!

I knew after the last few post, the last thread about this topic would not last. Everyone is entitle to their OWN opinions about what ever subject, and we all will never fully agree because some have different opinions and while I didn't see what happen to get it taken down, I knew where it was headed. Once someone is challenge in their statement, it's down hill from there. I don't get it? Off to lunch I go!!!

I have no problem with "different opinions" - however, delusional self-righteous opinions are fair game.

To me this story sounds more like a warning to people who are rushing into marriage before they're ready.

I won't say that it is impossible that I will get a divorce someday, but I also don't think it's foolish to think that marriage is and should be forever. Of course, the whole marriage thing is a bit more complicated if you're Catholic. I have no desire to deal with getting an annulment.

I believe in divorce. I'm hoping we never have one and don't plan on it, but I know it happens and sometimes it really needs to. Saying everyone should just stay married no matter how unhappy they are together is quite ridiculous.

I don't believe in divorce, but at the same time, I won't knock other people for wanting one of their own if they want one. Everyone is different and has different beliefs and if you believe that divorce is not an option when you are getting married, you better hope your partner has those exact beliefs and want to stick it there. If not, then deal with it. You can't MAKE someone stay with you.

Just in case there are some die hard Christians who says "Well, the bible says not to get a divorce." There is an exception in the bible and if you read it, you will know what it is.

People can preach till the dodo birds come home about 'divorce isn't an option' guess what, it's a REALITY, for anyone and everyone. It doesn't discriminate. Crap happens, sometimes people change, or sometimes people are REALLY good at hiding things.

Grrr...double post.