Cocktail vs. Black-tie & Invitations

Black tie = formal gown, generally. cocktail = short cocktail dress.

I added it to my website. Black tie is generally long gowns. We are calling ours "formal cocktail" I want people to look nice, but I know it can be a pain to try and find a long gown!

Black tie is more than just attire. There are a lot of things that should be happening in order to call it a black tie affair. Don't put anything regarding attire anywhere in your invites. If you must put it anywhere, put it on your website. However, the general consensus on this website is that adults know how to dress themselves. If anyone was really that clueless I'd like to think they might just ask you or a close friend/family member.

Really, you shouldn't be indicating guest attire anywhere unless it is black tie, which has a lot of specific guidelines (all of which I'm not familiar with, but include things like white glove dinner service, some kind of band, and formalwear).

Let them wear what they want. They are adults and don't need to be told what to wear. They are not props for photos. Black tie attire is allowed to be specified if the event is actually black tie, but since you have to ask, yours likely is not.

ETA: Formal cocktail doesn't mean anything. It's just a made-up phrase that will more likely confuse your guests. You indicate the formality of your event with your stationary, venue, time of day, etc.

@becoming a mrs - that was my concern, if guests might not have a tux or super formal wear. I like "formal cocktail"!

No, that's not a real dress code.

Cocktail is already semi-formal. Just leave it as cocktail.

Formal cocktail means nothing actually. My dress code was semi-formal ballware.

I believe it is only polite to address attire if the event is, in fact, black tie. Otherwise, the formality of the invitations prompts the formality of attire.

It is totally appropriate etiquette wise to include the guest attire level on the invitation, but in my personal opinion I only think it's necessary if you are having a black tie wedding (otherwise I would include the information on your wedding website).

Also there is a big difference between cocktail attire and black tie! And several levels in between

Cocktail Attire - Short casual but cute cocktail dresses for women, men can wear a suit or dress pants with a blazer or sports jacket

Semi-Formal Attire - A step up from cocktail attire but still not black tie, men should wear dark suits, women should wear a fancy dress but it can be short or long

Black Tie Preferred & Black Tie Optional - I personally hate these attire levels because I think they're too confusing It can be interpreted as anything from "I want everyone in black tie but if you don't own a tux I'm not forcing to to buy one" to "the groomsmen are wearing tuxes so if you want to wear a tux it's appropriate to do so"

Black Tie - men in black tuxes, women in floor length dresses or suuuuuuuuper nice short dresses, keep in mind that Black Tie weddings should not start before 6pm per etiquette rules I didn't make up

We're not putting attire guidelines anywhere. We're having a pretty formal wedding, but guests will probably pick up on that based on the time, location, and the invitation itself. I'm sure they'll all look great and if someone shows up in jeans it's not the end of the world, I probably wouldn't even notice.

Mine was winter wonderland chic.

It is totally appropriate etiquette wise to include the guest attire level on the invitation,

nope.

Black tie is way more than attire. For it to be black tie it has to be after 6pm, at a five star event venue, a multi course white glove dinner, open top shelf bar, free valet, a wine sommelier, invites have to be white/off white cotton paper with black writing, usually no save the dates, a live multi piece "band" more like a small orchestra.

You don't, unless it's black tie.

black tie: after 6 pm, white glove plated dinner service, valet parking, live band, top shelf full open bar, etc.

I'm attending a black tie wedding in 2 weeks and it said it on the invitation, if that helps!

I'm trying to find these guidelines that @emmy and @princessconsuela are referring to in order for an event to be classified as black tie. The only thing I found was this, "In the last few decades, black tie has been increasingly seen in the United States at formal day wedding in place of the traditional Morning dress. However, etiquette and clothing experts continue to discourage or condemn the wearing of black tie before 6 pm.[27] "

My wedding starts at 5 and cocktail hour starts at 6:00 pm. FH and I are big fans of formal wear and we would love our wedding to reflect that.

ETA: I type slow so thanks for answering the requirements for black tie events!

What about black-tie optional?

That isn't a real thing.

@Crystal Will the feel of the reception be formal? If so, I think black-tie optional is definitely acceptable. However, if it's just like a "standard" wedding, guests might be confused once they get there!

@originallaura - where can I find those requirements, like what source outlines those?