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Josephine
Savvy August 2015

Church weddings vs. non-church weddings.

Josephine, on November 26, 2013 at 2:48 PM Posted in Planning 0 16

My FH is Catholic (although he never goes to church) and wants to get married in a church, I don't believe in organized religion but am open to it. However when my sister got married in the church she had to go to mass every week in order for the church to agree to marry them, I do not want to be forced into anything and i've also heard it's more expensive? any advice. from anyone who's being married in a church? or not? Also if you know any churches you would recommend in the LA area that would be great since while my FH is "religious" he doesn't have a church in mind....

16 Comments

Latest activity by Josephine, on November 26, 2013 at 5:10 PM
  • L
    Master February 2015
    LetItSnow ·
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    Try a non-denominational church. That way you don't have to do the whole Catholic marriage class, regular mass etc.

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  • TheOGJesse's Girl
    Master March 2014
    TheOGJesse's Girl ·
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    The wedding in the church itself is not that much. My Catholic church only charges $100 for a wedding there.

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  • Mrs.Anna Noble
    VIP July 2016
    Mrs.Anna Noble ·
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    Ask Paris she's not in the L.A area but I'm pretty sure she's having a Catholic wedding.

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  • Lacey
    Master May 2014
    Lacey ·
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    I agree with LetItSnow, if you're wanting to get married in a church and don't want to be pushed into anything - don't try to get married in a Catholic church. Classes are almost always required.

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  • Private User
    Super February 2014
    Private User ·
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    We're getting married in a non-denominational church. however, we both were raised catholic. personally, i have too many differences with the catholic church so getting married there was out of the question for me, but i wanted a church and religious ceremony, so non-denominational worked best.

    as for the requirements of marriage in the catholic church, at least one of you has to have been baptized (and i think confirmed too) in the catholic church. then you'd also have to talk with the monsignor about what kind or pre-cana is required.

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  • CaitlinWife
    VIP November 2013
    CaitlinWife ·
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    I did NOT want to get married in a church. I kicked and screamed and moaned about it, because frankly, me and Jesus aren't so good right now. But, due to a series of strange events, I got married in a church. And you know what? It wasn't so bad. We had a friend marry us, so we got to make the service as churchy as we wanted it (not much!) and there was already a backdrop, and we just jazzed up the alter decorations, and the windows were already gorgeous, there was excellent lighting, and all we did were pew decorations. So, not so bad.

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  • Nonna T
    Master April 2014
    Nonna T ·
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    Most catholic churches will require you to be a member. here is a start for your research: http://www.foryourmarriage.org/catholic-marriage/faqs/

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  • Samantha
    Master May 2013
    Samantha ·
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    We didn't have a religious ceremony for our wedding. However, H is Catholic & wants it to be recognized by the Catholic church. We are legally married, but at some point will do a convalidation within the Catholic church. The priest we talked to said that we have to do a test & then complete pre-cana. He didn't say that I would have to start attending the church or anything.

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  • AndreaLily
    Master October 2013
    AndreaLily ·
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    We are actually doing exactly what Samantha is doing. It depends on the church too, some require counseling and/or classes which can take months. I had one friend who was also required to attend a weekend retreat. I've never heard of one requiring you to attend mass, you do (or at least one of you) have to be members of the church.

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  • Josephine
    Savvy August 2015
    Josephine ·
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    Thanks guys, the whole non-denominational church is probably how we're going to have to go, and hopefully that's good enough for my FH and our families.

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  • Vanessa R.
    VIP February 2014
    Vanessa R. ·
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    We are getting married in the church. we had to attend 2 classes but there was no mention of ensuring we attend mass (which we dont). also we met with the priest 2 times. the next time will be the rehersal. he never mentioned anything about the cost. each parish is different

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  • Josephine
    Savvy August 2015
    Josephine ·
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    Mrs. K your venue is BEAUTIFUL!

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  • Liza
    Dedicated April 2014
    Liza ·
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    I didn't want a church wedding at all. But FH and I made a agreement with my moms that we would and she would pay the reception and church fees. But FH and I both grew up christian so it isn't a big deal.My mom is paying $600 and that includes the church, organist ,coordinator and clean up fee. FH and I are still going to make a donation to the pastor (my uncle) for marrying us ! Like others mentioned look for a Non-Den church . Good Luck !

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  • Theresa Beale
    Master November 2014
    Theresa Beale ·
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    Have you and your FH discussed children? Usually one of the requirements for getting married in a Catholic church is a commitment to raise your children Catholic. That may be a discussion you need to have before you move forward if you decide to go with a Catholic church.

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  • C
    Devoted August 2014
    Cassidy ·
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    We're getting married in the Catholic church (same situation, FH is Catholic and I am not) and they definitely didn't make us agree to that. We do have to do precana, but not attend church weekly (that being said, if you are having a Catholic mass you might want to attend a few times to familiarize yourself with the style of the service!)

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  • Josephine
    Savvy August 2015
    Josephine ·
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    Yes we've talked about baptizing our children and letting them decide for themselves when the time comes what they want to believe in. I was raised with my mom and siblings being catholic and my dad's side being christian and I went to church when I was younger and I even have a few religious tattoos i highly regret lol, I wasn't ever shown there are other beliefs to explore so it's very important to me that my children get to decide for themselves so I'll have to watch out for that @theresa

    @cassidy my sister was married about 9 years ago so maybe I'm not remembering what she told me completely right but I'm pretty sure she talked to me about HAVING to go to church and everything.

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