Ceremony and no reception

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Showing "love" doesn't mean you have to put yourself into debt to do it.

You're commenting on it also. Just saying.

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@Angel Whisperer, No one EVER said it did, including myself. A cake and punch reception should cost you a few hundred dollars AT MOST, and that at least would be a good way to show your appreciation for the people that went out of their way to drive/fly, dress up nicely, and probably get you a gift. To not do ANYTHING is rude AF.

I would NEVER EVER advise someone to go into debt for a party, even the best party of all "your wedding reception".

Wow. What a rude comment.

I guess I'm wondering why you're posting then? Who's threatening, bully or intimidating anyone?

This is comical. As Muriel said, the OP IS having a reception - she said she is hosting food and drinks in her home for guests. That is a reception (receiving guests). She just doesn't understand that she's having a reception. The definition is apparently lost on her.

Also Emily, someone came along to validate this plan. She's literally not hosting anything. The second half of the thread deals with that. There's a whole backstory.

Also my comments about someone being rude can't be edited, but the offensive posts were removed. So some of us look cray. Please understand that there were posts removed that would explain our responses. Don't love that, mods. We should have the right to edit our posts to explain our responses

No trying to start anything but everybody is over reacting. Her original post didn't give enough info, but she has come back and given details that were missing. This thread doesn't need any more posts about etiquette following a ceremony because she has stated that she IS doing something afterwards. And it sounds like meets your guys' requirements so let it go.

If you have guest that is just rude and disrespectful. Nothing to love about it.

Hey guys!! I'm back. So surprised to see people are still commenting on this thread. First off, I wanted to thank those that came to my defense. And I wanted to take a minute to clear things up for the last time.
1. We are having a ceremony. And holding a small get together at our home afterwards with food and probably cake. The reason I didn't want to call it a reception is because I wasn't sure if that was good enough to be considered one. We don't want a huge reception. We want something laid back where we can hang out with family and celebrate. So that's my bad. I was just using the wrong verbiage.

2. Me and FH do have bad social anxiety. I understand we will be the center of attention, because after all it is OUR wedding. But with a reception there's usually a first dance, a father daughter dance, cake cutting, speeches, etc. I wanted to avoid all of that. Because the wedding is going to he hard enough. Saying our vows will be hard. I HATE talking in front of people. But I'll be marrying the love of my life, so I'm going to push through it. The reception isn't important enough to us to put ourselves through more anxiety. We just want to have fun that day.

3. Call what were doing rude if you like. It is our choice. And as I said many many times I appreciate your feedback. But this is how we're doing things. This is what works for us.

The fact is, we're all getting married here. Some are spending 1000s some are spending 100s. Were all doing what we can with what we've got. I come here to hopefully get some advice, vent, get help with planning. And I can honestly say every post I've ever made has gotten hate. And I don't get that. Were getting married!! Everyone should be happy and helpful. Not mean and hateful. This should be a fun experience.
Everyone should just lighten up a little. Plan your wedding the way you want to. I'll plan mine the way I want.

So if y'all have anymore questions, read the whole thread. All of the answers are in there. Calling me rude after 100 other people already did isn't going to do anything for you except boost your score on here.

Have a nice day.

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No one thinks that is rude. Plenty of people skip all of those things. The dances and speeches are unnecessary and optional. It's a reception as long as you're providing food and drinks. The original post made it seem like you weren't doing that so that's why people advised otherwise, imo.

View Quoted Comment I see that now. I learned something new. But there were some people coming for me, telling me I'm rude and only trying to get gifts.

I would be ok attending just a ceremony as a guest. As long as it is communicated.

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Yikes! Sorry to hear that. But yeah, sounds like your wedding will be great!

I would be pretty annoyed as a guest. You should elope.

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FGS- read the whole thread before you comment. She is having a reception. She was not aware that hosting guests in your home for food and beverages IS considered a reception. Ergo, she thought that because she was not having first dance, toasts, dancing etc that she was not having a reception.

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That is a little harsh I think. This will be my first marriage- but in the event of a second wedding I would only want my closest friends and family to attend. Since we don't know the whole scenario seems a little rude to just judge someone. You don't even know if on the invite they requested no gifts.

*****please******

You could absolutely just do a ceremony. I think it's appreciated if you take your guests out for drinks and/or food after but you can do whatever you'd like.

I think to avoid being really rude, you need to either:

-Elope

-Have just a few witnesses (or however many people you want there) and pay for a meal after

-At least have cake and punch for people after the ceremony

Because if people are invited to a wedding, they're probably going to get you a gift and it's just not right to invite people just to a ceremony and have them fend for themselves.

sorry, I didn't see how many responses there already were or read your explanation. I think what you're doing is perfectly fine then (see bullet #2)