Cash Bar?

At the same time, I have no patience for the argument that you must provide alcohol at a wedding. For those on a low budget, paying for alcohol could well mean that they have to invite fewer of the people they care about. I would rather see people inviting the people they love and providing them with what they can afford than excluding some people so others can drink alcohol.

And for the record, we had an open bar at our reception.

If you do not want to do an open bar or a cash bar you can do a wine pour or a signature drink

I have been to weddings on the East Coast and thw West coast and I have only been to 1 cash bar.. and I had no idea that it was going to be a cash bar... love my cousin, but i was totally unprepared.. we are having an open bar, however we are doing it DIY and hiring a bartender, with well drinks, beer, wine etc...with limited liquor, i think i know what my friends like and we will have that.. good luck, but i would NEVER have a cash bar... i see your date is a year out, can u save the money in the upcoming year ??

I have been to weddings on the East Coast and thw West coast and I have only been to 1 cash bar.. and I had no idea that it was going to be a cash bar... love my cousin, but i was totally unprepared.. we are having an open bar, however we are doing it DIY and hiring a bartender, with well drinks, beer, wine etc...with limited liquor, i think i know what my friends like and we will have that.. good luck, but i would NEVER have a cash bar... i see your date is a year out, can u save the money in the upcoming year ??

Just a note. I realized that a few of you seemed to think that a "cash bar" means that you can only pay in actual cash. A lot of places accept credit cards and debit cards as well.

Well said Danielle C.!

I agree with Kimberly! A cash bar is better than no bar at all! My side of the family are drinkers where as my FH side are not. My parents are paying for an open bar BUT my cousin got married this past Feb. and had a cash bar and we still had a great time! I think if your family and friends know how to let loose, pay for their own drinks will not be that big of a deal, but some find it "tacky". I wouldn't worry too much about it!

I wouldn't call it "tacky." That's not right - you're having a wedding, and you're limited to what you can afford. The people who really love you and want to share your day shouldn't care.

That having been said, when we sat down to make our plans, I felt pretty strongly about not having a cash bar. For me, personally, that didn't gel with the kind of host I wanted to be.

However, we also didn't want to serve liquor. I didn't see a need for it, and it complicates the driving thing.

We're doing our wedding at a restaurant, so we're going to offer a few quality options each for beer and wine. The place will order whatever kind of beer we want and work out a fixed price per drink ahead of time. If people want liquor, they can do that as cash. We'll also have a cap (based on the estimated number of drinks per person) and the option to go beyond that cost cap if we reach it before the party's through. I thought this was a good compromise.

Another thing I've seen people do is an open bar for the first two hours of the reception, and cash for the remainder.

Our venue comes with a cash bar, and no outside alcohol is allowed. Very, VERY few of our guests drink so we plan on paying for one drink, for whoever wants one. Hopefully that makes up for the cash bar. =]

We provided the open bar that was within our means - beer, house wine and rail liquor highballs (so rum and coke is fine, martinis are not). We cut corners everywhere we could. I DIY'ed the flowers, my gown was a sample sale, our venue was a pub, we DIY'ed the invites, photographer for 2 hours only, on and on...

Ultimately, I don't find cash bars tacky. If your wallet is light, then it's light. If it's normal in your area, ok, just let me know where that is so I never move there.

But what's tacky as hell is spending money on pro flowers, fancy designer gowns and other froufrou stuff at the expense of your guests. I would have rather gotten married in rags than make my guests pay for their drinks.

I think it has to do with where you are from. Here it is a given at banquets halls to have open bar 'included' in the per person price. And honestly the price difference is only like 5-8$ per person. That being said--it is your choice whether or not to have the cash bar. However it is SO important that you let your guests know if it is a cahs bar! It was sooo embarassing when we went to a wedding- and none of us had cash !!! a few of us went on an 'atm run' for our table to get money. I know some people think that cash bar will deter people from getting durnk, but it wont. If people want to drink-they'll drink.

Forgive me if I sound ignorant---again, long island is like a different country sometimes (no i do NOT want mustard on my burger)..but does most everyones impression of 'open bar' mean the couple pick up the bar tab at the end of the night? I'm confused my venue was not like this...we pay a certain amt per person and it is open basr for everyoen regardless of what they drink...

Shannon wrote...

But what's tacky as hell is spending money on pro flowers, fancy designer gowns and other froufrou stuff at the expense of your guests. I would have rather gotten married in rags than make my guests pay for their drinks.

BRAVO! I couldn't have said it any better. Frank drinks single malt Scotch. It is pricey. We never expect to find it on an open bar. He has a lovely flask that fits nicely in my handbag.

Mallory, You are spot on, if people want to drink, they will find a way.

Just to explain my statement about people being responsible- In MN, if you supply the liquor you are responsible for any damage or accident that happens if a person consumes too much alcohol. In order to protect yourself you can purchase DRAM insurance. Bars have this as do for-hire bartenders. We probably will hire bartenders for this reason. But if we just left the kegs and wine sitting out and someone over-imbibes we would be responsible for anything that happens to them or that they do to someone else.

I am in a dilemma with the same situation. My FH and I went to his cousins wedding and it was an open bar and I remember how we treated it. lol whoops. People do take advantage of that and so does the bartender (those drinks were STRONG) Which made their bill really high. I dont want that, who would. I agree with a cash bar and I'm pretty sure thats what we will do, I'm only concerned with what my guests will think. but you what its my day and I shouldnt care what they think. hehe. and if they want to drink alcohol and get drunk and drive. Thats not my fault.

Thanks everyone for the ideas, I think everyone has a valid point, but we are not doing anything overboard, we are just having a pretty standard wedding, and most of the weddings I have been to in this area have all been cash bars. I've been to about 15 weddings and there I think were like 2 open bars and the parents were loaded. I definitely think that it is one of those things that when the time comes around and if we have extra money, we may do an open cocktail hour or something like that. I just couldn't believe when the magazine said that like it is practically illegal as far as weddings go to have just a cash/credit card bar. We will definitely specify on the invite what kind of bar it is.

I'm from NY so open bar is standard and expected. I had the money to pay for it and I did......that is the type of hostess I am. If you can't afford it then you can't afford it but there is one wedding that left a bad taste in my mouth because of this. Everything about the reception was horrible and people who had driven a distance were pissed that not even soft drinks were included. In short it wouldn't be my thing however you are letting the guests know beforehand so good luck!

We are providing enough wine (red and white) for everyone to just have wine if they would like. However, some of my extended family are beer aficionados, so we are having a cash bar for the few people that might prefer a different type of alcohol than FH and I. I don't think it is tacky. Because we are providing wine complimentary. We discussed it and think it is actually a nice gesture towards those with different alcohol tastes. We'll see how our guests take it, but I'm satisfied with our decision.

I don't personally like the idea of a cash bar. But, it is pretty normal from my neck of the woods. FH and I are offering an open bar for our reception. We're paying an independent bartender to mix & serve drinks ($90)and we are supplying the alcohol ourselves. I wouldn't feel comfortable having my guest come out of pocket for an occasion that I invited them to share in.