Bridal Shower: Are you inviting moms/grandmas or just the girls?

I'm not sure if I'll be having a bridal/wedding shower but when my sister got married she had 2 showers. Mom and FMIL were invited to both. They were both on a weekend afternoon and there were around 15-20 ladies at each shower. Her FH was allowed to attend either/both showers but had no desire to attend so he did not. I have heard about FH's showing up at the end to help load presents into the car. I wouldn't necessarily call it a tradition - that may be a regional thing. We saved the lingerie and cocktails for her bacherlorette party which mom and FMIL were not invited to.

Most bridal showers are not racy, most are pretty damn boring.

Purpose of the bridal shower is to shower the couple with gifts for their shared home. My bridal shower is as a restaurant and it is hosted by my mother, FMIL, FH's stepmom and my bridesmaids. Invited are most women in both of our families and some friends. FH will not be attending at all because it is the same weekend as his bachelor party. Otherwise, he probably would be attending at the end to say thank you.

My bachelorette party is only my bridesmaids and my closest friends. My mom, FH's step mom, and my FSILs are invited to the first portion of it. My little sister is a bridesmaid and she is 15. We're doing mani/pedis and then all going out to dinner. After dinner, the moms and my little sister will go away and the rest of us will go out. I don't know whether or not my FSIL will stay for the latter portion.

I have never seen a racy bridal shower. It is mostly boring, games, and gifts for the couple and a bunch of women. I will be having one most likely with a bunch of women and the bridal party as well.

Bridal showers are supposed to be thrown for you --- you wouldn't arrange one for yourself. Technically, they are supposed to be thrown by someone who isn't part of your family, but it is pretty common for aunts/cousins to host the shower I think. My bridal showers were at a restaurant and at a baseball game. They were both family-oriented. Lingerie showers are somewhat less common, but they would typically be friends-only if someone was throwing one for you. Of course, my husband's grandmother got me lingerie for my shower, so you never know.

I've never been to a "racy" bridal shower. It's always been a mix of friends and family members (women of all ages and sometimes small children) and the gifts were things from the wedding registry. I expect my shower will be the same.

ETA: I've never heard that the shower has to be hosted by someone outside of your family. As long as you don't throw one for yourself, you should be ok. My mom and sisters are hosting mine and no one has had an issue with it.

Both of my showers were hosted by my mom and then my MIL, so of course they were invited to both of them. The one hosted by my MIL was at DH's grandmother's condo, so she was there along with all of DH's aunts, cousins and SIL.

DH was at neither since one was out of town (in my hometown) and the other one was on the same weekend as my bachelorette party, so he was staying elsewhere.

For the bachelorette party, my mom and MIL came out for the dinner portion. But then left before we hit the bars and clubs for drinking and dancing. My SIL didn't come out for the party since she doesn't like big gatherings with people she's not familiar with.

My FH's family is throwing me one that my mom (and maybe my one aunt) will be invited to and my friends are throwing one that will be just friends. I haven't been to a racy one either. My other female relatives live out of state & wont' be invited.

My girls are hosting and I told them the guest list is up to them. I quite sure many of my older guests will be invited to the shower.

I've also never been to a racy bridal shower. It's always been family and friends, female if it is a bridal shower, and male and female if it is a couples shower. We'll be having a couples shower so we'll have all of our friends and family be invited.

I'm having a jack and jill backyard bbq. There will be grilling, yard games, and none of that IMO silly bridal party junk.

Also never been to a racy bridal shower.

Are you talking about a lingerie shower? It seems from posts on here that some people have lingerie showers in addition to their boring, registry gift shower, but I've never heard of that. Most of the time in my group of friends & family, the lingerie "shower" will be part of the bachelorette party. Sometimes the moms are invited but not always.

ETA: to your other questions, your FH can be there if you want him to be. I think it's nice if he's there because usually the gifts are for you guys as a couple. I would love to do a co-ed shower but my mom hated the idea, and she's the one throwing mine so it's up to her!

You're reading about the trendy stuff. Most bridal showers are just a bunch of ladies of all ages coming together to eat some finger foods, play some games, and then shower the bride with gifts.

If you do a REAL bridal shower, and not a trendy one, you'll have mom's, grandma's, friends, BM's, etc as long as they are invited to the wedding.

Like others have said, you have a bridal shower that's appropriate for all ages, then a separate bachelorette party with a much smaller guest list and the racy stuff. I don't have any idea what a Jack n Jill is.

My bridal shower is the week before my wedding and nearly all of the ladies that are invited to my wedding are invited. My mom and bridesmaids are hosting. We are expecting between 45 and 50 although nearly 80 invites went out. It is a Luau & Lingerie theme. Everyone is asked to dress in some type of Hawaiian attire. They only allowed me at the first meeting and I volunteered to do the favors. Should be fun!

My Bachelorette party is two days before my wedding - didn't want to be all puffy eyed and bloated from all of that drinking!

My bridal shower was just a brunch so everyone was invited

My bridal shower is in a couple of weeks and my mom, grandmother and FMIL are all invited. The theme is "Brittany's Favorite things" I am really excited to see what my bridesmaids put together.

My mom and his mom have been given the opportunity to have a guest list. Besides the wedding, this is the only girly event where they can show off, so its really for them to enjoy as well.

My bridal shower will have moms and grandma's and will do the traditional few games, cocktails, food, presents and conversation. I want to tell my MOH (sister) that I would be totally up for a lingerie party or something like that for my bachelorette party when it's just close friends. I'm sure my mom will come up for my party at some point too.

The only racy, cocktail parties I've been to are bachelorette parties; perhaps you're just a little confused? In this case most of the time the mother or FMIL is not invited and the parties are small.

Any bridal shower I have been to has had both the mother and FMIL in attendance and every woman who is invited to the wedding is also invited to the shower.

I am only inviting the girls from my family and the FH family. The moms, aunts, cousins, sisters, and the BMs. That is it!!! His family and my family havent met before. I've met his family and he has met my family, but this is the first time the sides will meet each other. I wanted it this way so the entire family would know each other before the wedding and I wouldnt have to play introductions all day on the day of the wedding. I am not having a bridal shower that includes friends and coworkers.