Are you supposed to choose the MOB and MOG dresses?

I wouldn't. They are grown women, and are perfectly capable of dressing themselves. I would probably give them a color (like you did) and a level of formality. I've seen brides give them a color swatch- since shades of red can vary so much.

However, I'd make sure they aren't wearing the same color as your bridesmaids.

I agree with Meghan. I'm wearing Ivory and my mom has to do liker or darker so she is doing Champagne. Now I need to see what my stepmom is going to do? She wants me to go shopping with her so we will see.

I went shopping with both my mom & FMIL because they both wanted my input on their dresses. My mom was trying on very nice formal skirt & matching tops and decided on a chocolate brown color. The material was satin. Our colors are pink & green so it will definitely flow.

My FMIL on the other hand was trying on dresses that were chiffon and would make her stick out like a sore thumb. They were too juvenile for her age and I just didn't like any of them that she tried on. I'm afraid she's going to pick a dress that is either the same color pink as my MOH (since she insists on pink!) or clashes completely with the wedding party.

My mom is going to be getting a dress similar in color to the bridesmaids and was worried it would be strange. I actually really like the idea - since she is another VIP in my life. I am not sure what my FMIL is going to wear.. I should ask her at Christmas if she has looked at any options. When we went dress shopping, she looked at a navy blue dress, which would be pretty with her skin tone.

Technically no, I don't think you're supposed to. But it probably depends on your relationship with your mom/MOG, and their relationship with clothes. My mom asked me to help her pick out a dress, b/c she wants to coordinate and also "stand out". But, she asks me to help her pick out most of her new clothes anyway. If she hadn't asked me for my opinion, I wouldn't have said anything.

Let them choose but so long as they don't wear white or the bridal party colors.

No way! LOL

You can certainly guide them of course because it's your wedding and you want an overall "look"

But you can't choose their exact dresses.....I wouldn't.

I went shopping with both my mom & and My FMIL. I told them a rough idea of what I would like. i said something nice, preferably long either silver or in a darker shade of Blue or green but not my wedding colors since they are not BMs...

Then they proceeded to try on dresses and I gave my opinions but for the most part I let them pick which one they liked or felt comfortable in....

No. They are grown. I think you can have guidelines though. I told FH's bio mom that she couldn't wear what she wore to his little brother's Las vegas wedding. Everyone was appalled. Just because you have the body for it doesn't make it right. lol

Thanks ladies...I totally agree. I don't want to have with deal different clothing styles either. I took my BM's to DB and said this is the color I like what do you like. They picked 3 dresses and I made a decision from their. However while at the appointment I decided that I will be paying for their hair because I don't want to see the stripper ponytail to surface at my wedding

NOOOOO...by all means give them a color or colors selection and let them choose what they fell most comfortable in. My mom wore Champaign like my BM's but that was not a problem and my MIL wore a darker shade but all in all everyone looked good!!!

Like the others said - they're all grown women who can dress themselves, so I asked them (2 moms, 2 steps) to choose what they were comfortable in. I don't know my MIL/stepMIL's styles anyway, so I would've rather they picked something out they're comfortable in than me pick something they feel ugly or uncomfortable in.

They all had 4 totally different outfits - 1 pantsuit, 2 dresses and 1 skirt/fancy top. 1 blue, 1 black/ivory, 1 red and 1 black/multi. They all looked great and had outfits that they felt comfortable and beautiful in. My MIL wore a red sweater-type dress (despite the BM's being in red), and I don't think anyone even noticed/cared that she had the same color on. But - she wasn't taking pics w/ the BMs anyway, so it really didn't matter to us.

Good I also don't want them to match.

I only asked that they choose a dress in a fall color so as to fit with our fall theme, and that they not choose a dress in wine, as that was the color of the BMs dresses. That being said, they each asked me to come dress shopping with them, because they didn't want to "pick something that I hated." My mom opted for a plum colored dress and MIL chose a cranberry red dress. They looked beautiful with our wedding colors. Here's a pic of both of our families together.

My mom and my fiance's mom gave me final say on what they are wearing... they never would have bought something with out getting my input -- they are both really sweet that way and wanted to be sure that what they wear complements the style and theme of the event.

Both my mom and his mom have asked what they should wear. I'm not picky so I'm not limiting, but if they want my "approval" by all means they can send me a picture

Heck no! Initially, I was going to have my wedding dress altered and dyed, but after I realized it was more costly than buying anohter dress my daughter and I have been scouring the internet. My daughter will shop with me because we love to shop together. Her only request is that I keep the girls covered for Mass. I am going with a pink that will be darker than her BM's. We are also keeping my dress a secret. lolol I don't even know what color she told her step mother and FMIL. Her colors are pale pink, pale green, ivory and gold.

Heck no! Initially, I was going to have my wedding dress altered and dyed, but after I realized it was more costly than buying anohter dress my daughter and I have been scouring the internet. My daughter will shop with me because we love to shop together. Her only request is that I keep the girls covered for Mass. I am going with a pink that will be darker than her BM's. We are also keeping my dress a secret. lolol I don't even know what color she told her step mother and FMIL. Her colors are pale pink, pale green, ivory and gold.

I went shopping with my mom and picked out a dress with her where the criteria was that she looked and felt STUNNING! She was almost more beautiful than me and I heard compliments all night long for her. She put so much time/money/effort into my wedding that I wanted her to look 200%! Bonus: her dress style matched that of my dress and my BM dresses. It looked awesome! As for MOG, she lives in another state, so I had no idea what she was going to end up wearing! I didn't pick colors for them.

@Mrs. Carole M (Former Carole B): All right, I have to ask: In the absence of a specific guidance, would you have left the girls uncovered for Mass? LOL

I think giving some direction is all that's necessary (which it sounds like you did) otherwise, in my opinion you'd sound a little bridezilla-ish (made that up, love that word!) If my future daughter in law told me she'd be picking out my dress or needing to approve it I'd likely laugh at her, but that's just me (fortunately that's a long way off for me, I hope!!)