Are anyone else's friends stealing their wedding ideas?

Dress with a satin sash, that she wants to do in a darker champagne kind of ivory. I purchased an ivory a-line-ish lace dress with a silk sash a couple of months ago. It's only not really an a-line because I'm having the underneath silk layer custom fitted down through the thigh, but the lace over it will still flow a-line, and the one she is planning to make is really similar to it. I've been planning vintage accents like antique looking silverware and dishes and now she's talking about wanting the same thing. I've been planning to use ivory, yellow, and blue flowers and now she also wants ivory and blue flowers. On top of everything else she wants to do so similar to me, she's now talking about having it in the same location! She doesn't see the big deal in her having so many similarities because probably only about 15 of the same guests will be attending each wedding so not that many people would even be aware of it. But I'm aware of it, and it's really annoying to have all my ideas

Suddenly being her ideas. She doesn't think that it should bother me for her to have the same basic style dress, similar colors, similar flowers, same location, vintage style, and everything else she's trying to copy. I know it shouldn't bother me as much as it does, I should be happy for her to be planning her big day, but it's difficult when it seems like all my hard research and planning is suddenly finding it's way into her wedding. I'm probably just over reacting, but it still bothers me and frustrated me all day. Also, when I mentioned that my fiancé and I are possibly getting married ahead of our big celebration, she now thinks she might do that too. Sorry this is really long, I just needed to vent.

Oh wow! That's just ridiculous! I would be annoyed too! Hell, I was annoyed at the fact that one of my ex friends found out that I asked my BFF to officiate my wedding and she asked him to do hers too! He's not her bff and she got married a month before me.... I was so mad because I knew she did it on purpose. Sigh, what are you going to do! I would suggest though that you stop telling her what you're planning for your wedding so she doesn't keep stealing your ideas

Sorry to hear that! unfortunately I don't have that problem but me and my sister are getting married around the same time and I hear her ideas but I have the respect to not try to copy her style and do something different....I definitely can see how something like this would make you mad - have you talked to her about it? Let her know exactly how you feel or stop sharing everything with her like sometimes I'll choose to not share certain things for this very reason

Yeah, definitely stop telling her.... heck, I'm kind of evil, I'd probably tell her exact opposites of what I'm doing, saying I changed my mind or something lol

(dang, WW still won't allow great than/less than symbols without cutting stuff off? lame-o! That's why I edited.)

@Abby & Karla- That's awful, why would she ask someone that was your bff, knowing you were using them and her's was first??? That's just rude!

Well I told her today when we were at the fabric shop, that the colors she was picking were way too close to my colors. Her response was "Not to sound like a bitch, but there's literally only going to be 10-15 mutual guests at our weddings, no one will notice." I basically said that she needed to pick something different because she was annoying me, so she ended up choosing different shades. Unfortunately she has to know what I'm doing for mine because she's one of my bridesmaids, and I'm one of hers, so that's why I was involved in all this mess today. I don't know what I'm going to do, because I'm slowly getting to the point where I'm going to flip out on her, which I know is bad because I'm very calm and easy going. It takes a whole lot to get me really mad at someone. It's just so inconsiderate to me because she knows that I'm most likely

Moving my date to the third, or last weekend in August, or mid-September and she has just started planning for early September. So it's possible that hers will end up being before mine, when I've had all these ideas and things purchased and planned, and now she's copying them.

Look on the bright side, you have good taste!

@Erin F.- Hahaha I already knew that!

That really is ridiculous. I would be annoyed and ticked off if one of my friends were doing that to me. I would tell her as little as possible about what you are planning. If it gets too bad, you might just have to say something. Its completely unfair to you what she is doing.

Luckily I'm not dealing w this yet...my BFF is getting married 2 months before me and we are in each others weddings...I am definitely more obsessed than she is ( I keep asking her when the bug is going to hit her like it has me) but so far what we want is pretty individual. We do have similar centerpiece ideas but they are different colors. Our venues are completely different and she is a little less traditional than I am and our dressed are completely different hopefully it stays like this.

I agree you def need to stop sharing your ideas. Share them here instead or find a different gf to talk to about out

@Lindsay P.- You're lucky you both want completely different things. She was even talking about doing centerpieces similar to what I was thinking. I haven't entirely decided on those yet, so I can't really say she stole it, it'd just be another similarity. The only thing that I think is keeping me from really saying something to her, is that I know they're still gonna be completely different because mine will have an all around carnival theme whereas hers will just be vintage. I don't think she has a theme.

That happended to me too!!! i always said i wanted a red and black wedding even before i was engaged. one of my besties got engaged and guess what? she is having red n black wedding. we were drinking wine one night and just gabbing about what we would name our potential kids and i told her. found out from another friend that she chose the names i told her. its so annoying becuz you sound like the copy cat when they were youre ideas in the first place!!!! oh...and my bestie stole my FH reading to me and now that is what her FH is reading to her now too. =[

I understand the frustration. I didn't have a friend steal my ideas, but we lent a lot of our wedding stuff to my husband's cousin for their wedding 2 weeks after ours. I was really afraid the ceremony would look just like ours, but it was COMPLETELY different. It's amazing how the same things have a different look and feel about them in different situations.

I would definitely stop sharing ideas with her. You're basically her free wedding planner

@Carly H.- Oh my gosh! I would be so mad if she were stealing something like our readings or kids names. At least so far it's just style and decor. I am definitely not telling her anything too detailed anymore. I'm worried about exactly what you said, that it'll look like my wedding is similar to hers if hers ends up being first (which I'm afraid it will be). I'm just glad I at least got her to pick different shades of blue and she's doing brown accents, not red and yellow like mine.

Carly, that's why I don't tell many people our ideas for children's names! Heck, I got upset when a friend copied my dog's name! Haha! I like to be unique, and I despise being copied, even if it is the greatest form of flattery...

Yikes! I'm not sure what to say. I would never steal my friends ideas consciously.

That's forbidden territory....

@KT- I'm hoping I get that lucky, and they end up not looking too much alike. It's still really annoying to hear her act like she's picked something out, when it's something I told her 5 months ago that I'm doing.

@Rebecca F.- I'm still trying to figure out if she's doing it consciously, or if she really thinks she's come up with some great ideas on her own.

Yes I had someone do the same thing to you done to me. I got engaged in Aug 2010 and my FH friend got engaged March2011. My FH friend girl I only met her once and before they got engaged she knew exactly all my wedding plannings EVERYTHING. When they announced her engagement 2 days later I started noticing. She first tet me she wanted a june wedding( Before I picked this date it was June 2013) Then she said she wanted an outdoor garden (like me). Then she said she wanted a dove release(I told her I wanted doves first but preferred butterfly release better) Then she said she wanted a horse carriage(I wanted a horse carriage cause my theme is Cinderella) Then she enter this wedding contest like I did which I enter in Feb and she enter in March close to April. I started to get annoyed. Then after it started getting worst. She started liking all the likes on my fb and trying to top it off like (ex: I like butter she would put she like cream cheese.) Then I saw some dress examples from(Con)

The same websites. Then I saw some similarities on centerpieces. After that I told her I wasn't haven't a horse carriage cause it was way out of our budget and perferred the rolls royce she then said she had the same idea and in fact put a payment for it but without having a venue(Weird) So I told her well I could just change it up to a vintage car like the old days like Titanic cars. After my friend told me this girl wrote her wedding is turning out to be a fairytale theme which that is my theme. She new it was cause I told her I wanted a Cinderella princess wedding. I started to get more mad and bring it upon my FH. I felt lie I was doing all the work and she was creating my edding from my inspiration. She theme wrote to me saing she wants to change everything cause some people were copying her but without saying it was me. Like for real. I was engaged first then 8 months later she was. So I send her a website with different themes and again told her my theme(cont)