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Jessica
VIP October 2019

Am i over reacting? Opinions please! Photographer issues.

Jessica, on June 27, 2019 at 4:24 PM

Posted in Planning 115

IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ THE WHOLE THING, PLEASE AT LEAST READ MY QUESTIONS AND FINAL STATEMENT AT THE END! I will make this short and sweet as possible, while still providing the details. I thank you in advance for taking the time to read and reply. First I'd like to say I am NOT AT ALL a...
IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ THE WHOLE THING, PLEASE AT LEAST READ MY QUESTIONS AND FINAL STATEMENT AT THE END!

I will make this short and sweet as possible, while still providing the details. I thank you in advance for taking the time to read and reply.


First I'd like to say I am NOT AT ALL a bridezilla. Im laid back, go with the flow, doing the vast majority of the wedding by myself. I also am a people pleaser BIG time, I hate for anyone to be upset, and I have a REALLY HARD TIME sticking up for myself.

Now, on to the story:

I've known my photographer for quite a while, and we are somewhere between friends & acquaintances. We normally message on FB a few times a year.



She did my pregnancy pictures almost 12 yrs ago when she was first starting out with photography and they were great. Absolutely loved them.

I instantly knew I wanted her for all bridal/wedding pics. We met up, discussed what FH & I wanted, and costs of different packages. We came to a decision on the 4 hour package + 1 extra hour + Bridal portraits. This was supposed to total $1,000.00.



SHE SAID AND OFFERED to apply her family/friend discount of 25% off which we were not expecting but thought was very nice of her. This is not anywhere on her business website or her card, so I would not even know about it if she had not told me. She said this would bring us down to $750 + taxes.

The week before my bridal portraits she sends me the invoice via email which allows me to put down a deposit (which I did). Before paying deposit I look over the invoice and note that total amount is $1,537.50. Double the amount I was anticipating.

So, I don't say anything, maybe she changed her mind or forgot but either way I don't want to make any waves. Plus, the price is still better than most photographers.

Its worth the price to have beautiful lasting memories, right?

On the invoice she has $175 for Bridal portraits, $250 for extra hour, and the rest was state sales tax.

Now, I know to many of you $1537.50 isn't alot of money, but to me it its hard to justify spending that much money on one single thing. If not for my fiance surprising me and buying my wedding dress for me (it was $2,000 & I wanted to stay under $500) I would probably have a dress I hate bc I just wouldn't be able to spend that much on 1 single item.

Anyhow, The plan was to do my portraits at a location I found on the river with dock and oak trees, very beautiful and very much my style.

If it rained, the plan was to go to my FILs house and do pics on the porch, covered deck and inside the house. The house is over a hundred years old and I absolutely love it.

Well, on portrait day, she's heading to my house to meet, and I tell her its raining but she insists we go the 2 miles down the road to see if its raining there. We get there and the sky is dark, looks like rain any second, plus its thundering. She says its fine let's start pics. About 4 minutes after were shooting, here comes the rain. I suggest going to FILs but she says its fine it will just blow over. It did not blow over. She attempts to do pics for about 20 more minutes then says ok were done.

Remember, me not being confrontational, and I trusting that she is the professional? So, I say ok.

That night she sends me a sneak peek, 3 pics that i love, and Im so relieved. This was a Saturday night. On Monday afternoon she emails me the album of pics. There was 53 pics total. Out of 53 there were about 10 that I liked. But there were only 3 I would actually use or even post on FB.

When I asked where the other pictures were she sends me 2 more saying the resolution or something was off.

Idk what to even say from here.

So heres what I want to know from y'all:
1. Isn't the point of hiring a photographer to make sure your pictures are PERFECT? Isn't that what Im paying all this money for?
2. Why did she only get 55 pics when my MOH got 96 on her iphone and I honestly liked those better?
3. Isnt 25 minutes kinda short for a bridal shoot? Ive spoken to 2 other professional photographers (both in the same price range and neither that I know) and they have both told me about 1 to 1.5 hrs for bridal portraits is their norm.
4. Do the poses not look unnatural to you? My Maid, Matron and another friend were all present and helping at the shoot and all said the poses looked 'off and unnatural'.
5. Shouldnt there have been more than 53 pictures? I asked her months ago and she said normally after the "bad pics" are thrown out, the bride has anywhere from 55 to 85 pictures, but that she normally takes well over 100. I only got 53, and of those 53, several are not usable and several are exact duplicates with one in color and one in black and white.
6. I am not questioning the QUALITY of the actual pics. When you put them side by side with the iphone pics they are hands down better. But, the poses or other imperfections are what is bothering me. The iphone pics had AWESOME poses.
7. Out of 53 pictures, I only have 3 that I would actually use. I knew I wouldn't like them all, but I expected to be able to use at least 25-30% of the pictures. Is it normal to only have this small amount of usable pictures?
8. How do I tell her I am not using her for the wedding now? I do not in any form trust her with my wedding pictures. When my MOH showed her parents (whom I am very close with) they called me that night and gave me an email address of another photographer and told me to call and schedule my portraits, that they had already paid for a bridal portrait shoot for me. They were that disappointed with the pictures. Which totally shocked me because I kept thinking it was either me or I was just overreacting. Also, we have not yet signed a contract. She told me we could just do it later before the wedding, so, I don't care about the deposit. She can keep it. Just how do I tell her Im not using her now?

9. Most importantly, am I overreacting?

THEN, to make MATTERS WORSE, I think she could tell thru our messages that I was not thrilled with them. So, she decided to call me, which I appreciated.

She starts off by saying she is "willing to reshoot the pictures" and then says, and this is a direct quote:
"I KNOW YOU WANTED TO DO YOUR PICTURES EARLY, BUT MAYBE WE CAN RESHOOT THE PORTRAITS IN SEPTEMBER. MAYBE BY THEN YOU WILL HAVE LOST SOME MORE WEIGHT AND WILL BE MORE CONFIDENT. HOPEFULLY YOU WILL LIKE THEM THEN. "
Did she just blame me for not liking the pictures?

Also, as for the pictures posted, I could have kept going and adding more I was not pleased with.

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115 Comments

  • Jessica
    VIP October 2019
    Jessica ·
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    So, you confirmed everything I thought about photoshop. I just assumed she must have "special photographer software" that could fix virtually anything.
    I wonder why she continually stopped my Maid, Matron and friend that were there numerous times from fixing things. She told them "not to bother" since she could edit it. And then, she didn't edit them. At least, they don't look edited to me.

    Did she think because Im normally do laid back I just wouldn't say anything? Why would she say she could remove the tarp, fix my hair, etc if she couldn't or wasn't going to?

    Were getting married October 12th 2019. Yes, I've been talking with other photographers and viewing their portfolios. And thank you for the tip.

    I have to say though, I'm a little hesitant now. My photographer has a nice website with good bridal portraits and wedding pics up. We've also had nearly daily communication since Feb or March about what I wanted, what to expect, things to do, etc. We had discussed editing the day of and prior to bridal portraits day. I was even going to get a spray tan to even out tan lines, but was told that wasn't necessary.
    She listened, we met, she responded super fast.... I had no idea there as a lack of communication, that she didn't realize I didn't want the tarp showing or my hair frizzy (I had to pay a HMUA to come to the house and do my hair and makeup for the portraits) or that she didnt really take in my vision.
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  • Jessica
    VIP October 2019
    Jessica ·
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    I'm just not sure why this picture 'made the cut'. You can't see my face, the shape of my dress, anything. If it were you in the pic, tell me what you would do with this picture? If it was a pic I took on my phone, I'd delete it. If it was a pic I took on a disposable camera, I would throw it away. Im surely not going to put this pic in my wedding album nor am I going to hang it on the wall. So in my opinion, it is literally a useless picture. I don't see what purpose it serves at all. Maybe if my hair was blowing behind me, along with dress and veil, it could have been awesome. But as is?
    I paid her for the bridal shoot/deposit $175, which was all she asked for (I offered to pay half but she said just to pay the $175 for now, which now seems odd to me). I received 53 pictures, although most are not even acceptable enough to go in a wedding album. That's $3.31/ each and I still would just throw this one out.
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  • Jessica
    VIP October 2019
    Jessica ·
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    Lol better make that website
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  • Birdie
    Savvy June 2021
    Birdie ·
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    You are lovely, these photos are not. From the composition, the lighting, the posing...it is all wrong. The comment to you was incredibly unprofessional as well as her entire behavior. What in the world was her reasoning to waut to take bridal portraits a week before??? That is not enough lead time to order portraits or an album to display at the reception (which is usually customary in the south)

    She did you a favor, find another photographer for your wedding asap! Good luck!
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  • needmorewine
    Expert May 2016
    needmorewine ·
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    She charges $2900 for this kind of work??

    Those photos look like they were taken by one of those people who just go out and buy a fancy camera and then declare themselves to be a professional photographer. Not an actual trained and experienced professional. I'm glad you've found this out now and can find a new photographer for the wedding.

    Also, your MOH's parents are awesome.

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  • Jessica
    VIP October 2019
    Jessica ·
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    I guess so. I just went back and looked at website and saw a $4100 option too.
    As for the trained and experienced professional part, i personally know that shes been doing this for over a decade. So, IDK what to think.

    Am i over reacting? Opinions please! Photographer issues. 1

    Am i over reacting? Opinions please! Photographer issues. 2
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  • Jessica
    VIP October 2019
    Jessica ·
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    She was saying that because it was the only other time my Maid and Matron would have been available to both be there, which was a big deal to me. They are essentially my only family other than my son.
    What does "composition" mean in regards to the photos?
    And thank you for your response!
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  • Jessica
    VIP October 2019
    Jessica ·
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    Oh, I forgot to agree, yes my MOH parents are incredible! They have adopted my son and I as "one of theirs" since the 1st time we met.
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  • Birdie
    Savvy June 2021
    Birdie ·
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    Composition as in the way the photo was arranged from the angle the photographs were taken and the placement of you and the shapes in the background, the space around you etc... a formal definition is "Elements of composition are: patterns, texture, symmetry, asymmetry, depth of field, lines, curves, frames, contrast, color, viewpoint, depth, negative space, filled space, foreground, background, visual tension, shapes."

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  • Tilar Fifield
    Devoted August 2019
    Tilar Fifield ·
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    So she is charging you basically $1,500 for your wedding day, which is the 4 hours + an extra hour. And then the bridal portraits? Just want to make sure I’m straight here. I can’t believe she charges that much for that amount of time. You can clearly see her work is not worth that. My photographer is charging us $850 for an 8 hour day and she did engagement photos for us on the house. Now, I’ll be the first one to say splurge on your photos because these will be photos you look at forever. I very much planned on spending $2,000 +. But, if the work isn’t worth it then find someone else! I know you loved her for your pregnancy photos but clearly bridal is not her style or passion. You look beautiful, but she could have posed you much better. You have hair in your face in a few of them even! Girl you need to drop her AND get a refund. Don’t even bother with a redo. I would just say something along the lines of “hey I’m honestly really disappointed in how my photos turned out. I really loved your work when you did my maternity photos but these photos do not bring me as much joy. Unfortunately we will not be needing your services for our wedding day any longer and thank you for the photos”. Don’t feel bad girl, she should be embarrassed. Not you. Stick up for yourself! This is your WEDDING! And every bride deserves to love her wedding photos. You got this!!
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  • Jessica
    VIP October 2019
    Jessica ·
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    Got it! Thank you!
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  • Jessica
    VIP October 2019
    Jessica ·
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    Yes, your understanding correctly about the cost.
    After I told FH about her comment yesterday with my weight, he lost his cool and said we definitely werent using her even if she was the worlds best photographer.
    He said just wait until she contacts me then tell her we decided to go a different direction and werent pleased with the bridal pictures. Im definitely not doing a redo, at least not with her.
    We also didn't do any engagement photos, so that was not included.
    Hopefully we can find an affordable and good photographer before the wedding who isnt booked. Wedding in 14 weeks!
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  • Tilar Fifield
    Devoted August 2019
    Tilar Fifield ·
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    Well good luck to you girl! And hang in there! 14 weeks is still plenty of time to get these kinks worked out. I hope you find someone who does beautiful work for a beautiful cost!
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  • Jessica
    VIP October 2019
    Jessica ·
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    Thank you for the kind and encouraging words!
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  • Emily
    Dedicated October 2021
    Emily ·
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    You are not overreacting at all. I would've been mad at the incorrect invoice. I would just tell her straight up. At least you weren't best friends so it should not stress you out too much.
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  • MOB So Cal
    January 2019
    MOB So Cal ·
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    For OP and any other bride looking for a photographer, make sure you ask to see "full wedding galleries" for past clients -- preferably at your same venue or a similar type of venue. ANYONE can "cherry pick" their very best photos from a bunch of different weddings and put them on a website. You want to see EVERYTHING they supplied to a past client, in order to get a realistic idea of what YOU can expect to receive. Also, ask for contact info of past clients you can call and talk with -- don't just rely on WW/Knot/Yelp reviews; personally TALK to past clients. If a photographer, or any vendor, won't supply names/contact info, move on. Good luck!

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  • MrsJohansson
    Expert June 2019
    MrsJohansson ·
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    Not sticking up for her (because she doesn't deserve it) but everyone has different perceptions on what photos look good and what ones don't so maybe that's why... if it were me, I would have taken my own pics and did it until I got it right, the way I wanted it to be. 53 photos for $175 is generous given most I know only give 10 for that price BUT I don't really want to get into pricing and being questioned cause I didn't do the job / wouldn't produce this kind of work. I would just cut my losses and move on. You can hire someone else to redo them and still get great pics for a wedding album. And no if I have not said you are not overreacting but it's time to move forward and find someone who can really capture you and act professionally.

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  • Miko
    Just Said Yes July 2023
    Miko ·
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    I definitely think you should get your money back because it’s pretty clear you were probably her first bride. Or take the pictures elsewhere and have them retouched.
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  • Brianna
    Devoted April 2025
    Brianna ·
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    Don't worry you're not overreacting. You probably handled it better than I would of. I'm sorry but I don't understand how this woman is a photographer. Also the thing about you losing weight is not cool. Rude! I really hope everything worked out for you. I'm sorry to hear that Smiley sad

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  • Rachel
    Expert September 2019
    Rachel ·
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    OMFG 🤦🏼‍♀️ An actual professional “fixes it before snapping so we don’t have to fix it in post” OMFG
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