51/2 year relationship...no engagement yet

I just tried reading everything you wrote op and my eyes rolled back in my head so far i think i may have suffered a seizure. wtf seriously. obviously you two are no where near mature enough for marriage or kids. your ideals are wayyyyy off, and you dont even have real world relationship experience. sorry, you live with parents, your communication skills are lacking and you sound like teenagers.

If you are a troll, go away...

If not... Whatever you do, commit and do it. Don't leave, and then come back, and then leave... that won't prove anything. If you are afraid of pregnancies, you can find plenty of high risk doctors, but don't bring a baby into the relationship. Is he the kind of man that you want your children to grow up to be like? If not, then your circles make even less sense.

@FMB, Nadia, and Samantha-I'm dying over here! Silent work giggles all over!

Oh also, guys I'm loving the pregnancy jokes, FH actually has his daughter due to a failed attempt at a trapped marriage RIGHT before he dumped her (he's like, "okay, you think this is a good idea for us to have a baby, lovely, we are still not dating any more). So yeah I think I find them particularly funny...

BUT I think there's been some miscommunication here: LittleMiss is saying she doesn't think her and FH should get married because he wants kids and she doesn't want to be pregnant. To which I say...seriously relax, we all worry (I hope) in the back of our minds about pregnancy, having kids, etc. but from what you've explained you guys are nowhere near there. If you downright do not want children (or do not want to be pregnant, w/e) and FH does then yes that is a deal breaker for a lot of people so that's a serious conversation you should have. But it doesn't sound like you don't want kids, you just don't want to be pregnant, which...is silly. But also, like I said, neither here nor there for you right now.

Yeah i would never get pregnant on purpose thats stupid. I want more then anything to marry him and have kids but my pregnancy fear is debilitating..my boyfriend knows this, I have even been seeking help through a therapist.,which helps but its not eliminating my fear of pregnancy/death completely. He knows im seeing a therapist and i even said to him, what if i chicken out when time comes? and he said i will have to try or he might have to find someone else :'(...so i have been trying to get over this fear and this week i have come to realize..that maybe i should let him go since i don't think i will ever get over this fear. which really sucks because i always wanted to know whats like to be pregnant and to have a baby and i love him more then anything in this world...he was only one that accepted me for me and saw me at my worst and still stayed with me...so if i leave him...its gonna hurt BIG time

Im just stuck on fence..i don't know what to do...i want to be with him and marry him desperately! but then apart of me is like "okay why you even thinking of marriage if you don't know you will beable to go through with it because of your fear..your being selfish!"

Also we are like i said saving for our very own place...although we are sharing a place with his dad and brother they are rarely home and we all split bills down the middle, its like our own place, so yeah we are in real world...we don't depend on parents at all..alot of families live together. we have car payments..rent and all other good stuff to pay. We are just getting sick of living with them so finally decided better to get our own place. so only difference is when we live on our own..is just its out very own place no one there..we know how we both are paying bills.

Snarky, LMAO!! Good one!

With what you just posted it sounds like you're more afraid of being alone than anything, which is normal, but also not a good reason to marry this kid who you have so much doubt about after 5 1/2 years

09/25/2014 by Janeen

"....true but i always dreamt of a wedding since i was little. "

Are you serious?

umm yeah im serious! ....obviously views on marriage change as grow older and most woman do dream when they are a kid for the true love and marriage one day

For everyone else with the obnoxious remarks...weren't you ever taught to not say anything if you got nothing nice to say...um yeah very mature there! this an advice board..Yes i know wedding board but figured this board i would get advice i need..since everyone is married/engaged ect.

thanks to everyone else that actually gave advice much appreciated..i do need alot of soul searching

He may be saving to get u the ring you want, stop bringing it up and wait a little longer.

You got lots of advice you needed, just not the advice you wanted.

1.)You want to get married so desperately propose to him. 2.)I think everyone is scared to have children, if you re that scared adopt. 3.) You seem too immature to get married or have kids.

That is all.

Here's the thing @littlemiss. You say that you are dreaming of a wedding. That is a fine dream. What you also need to grasp is what comes after a wedding, which is a marriage. You say that you have been living with him & his relatives and that he is more focused on working ion his car. It sounds like he is not ready for marriage right now. And that's fine. What YOU need to do is realize what you want and how you are going to get it. As long as the status quo stays as it is, he is going to keep having his cake and eating it too. Move out, get your own place, enjoy your 20s. Of he is man enough to make a commitment, then he will. If not, then you need to decide what you want. Do you want to stay with him and quite possibly never having a marriage? Or do you want a man who will actually provide for his family?

Why don't you try a forum for relationship advice? Or one for 14 year olds. Because that's what you sound like. We can't truly help you because we don't know you and this is something that you have to decide on your own. Just because we are engaged/married doesn't mean we have secret powers that got us there.

Also, please go back to school and learn about punctuation.

If you are 25, you are a very, very young 25. You have a fear of pregnancy, and his answer is that you need to try or he might have to find someone else? He's 26 and playing with 20 year old guys who are building cars, and he's spending money on that hobby while you're living in a family member's house? Are you sleeping in his childhood bedroom? You don't have real life experience -- not as far as housing goes. I know you think you do, but you don't. You may have a car payment, and that's a start. However, living in a family members house and splitting the bills is a very different experience than living alone. What's his father going to do if you can only come up with 60% of the rent? Throw you out? Of course not. If his father owns the house, he is not going to skip his mortgage payment because you didn't pay your rent. It's the same thing with the utility payments. I suspect you'll tell me you've paid your half of the bills and rent faithfully every month, so this argument doesn't apply. You're wrong. As long as you have this invisible safety net under you, you will never know what it feels like to either pay your rent or face eviction or pay your utility bill or have the power shut off. That's real life experience, and two years of that will mature you at warp speed.

There is no point in talking about engagement rings, marriage, and babies while he's busy dodging your questions about the future and tinkering with cars that represent an engagement ring you want and are not getting. Actually, I'd be lying if I said I'm not getting a weird vibe from this whole story.

A place of your own that you "share" with his family is not a place of your own. End of story.

I'm honestly having a hard time believing this post is legitimately coming from a 25 year old and not a 14 year old as well @jaunarywedding. This is a complete joke and I am embarrassed for you.

I'll just leave this here