What to do when you can't afford your dream wedding?

I totally understand what your saying, and it is stressfull but at the end of the day I thank God that I found my other half and that we are both ready to take this step together. Its about to joining of you to not how fancy or how much money you have to spend. Also you can find ways to have the wedding you want by checking on your options and being creative doing things yourself. Your ceremony is going to last all of 20 mins and then the reception. I planned on having a big wedding at home but I then changed my mind and decided on a destination wedding and instead of inviting 200 people I invited 50 and chose a beach wedding to make it more intimate and it ended up being cheaper then it would if I had 200 people at home. There are just so many options but I say just pray about it and you will get all the answers you need, you are blessed in so many ways already.

Well I would suggest doing sone extensive research before putting down any deposits. You can have a dream wedding on any budget. In the end, all that matters is that you are marrying the love of your life. I spent way too much money on my wedding. I don't regret it because it was perfectly me, but the next day, it was like a dream. I could barely remember half of the things that went on. Thank God for video. Lol Your dream should be about the marriage, not the wedding. The wedding lasts hours and your marriage lasts a lifetime. Good luck with everything. I'm more than willing to share budgeting advice.

IMPROVISE!!

do what you can and make that your new dream!

No sense in stressing over what you can't have..

My wedding vision was Champagne but our budget was beer....we decided on WINE COOLERS, LOL....and it will still be the greatest day of our lives!!!

..good luck..

Thank you, I suggested going on a cruise paying for our parents inviting everyone and doing a destination wedding. FH wants the big wedding and I'm trying to accomadate him. If it were up to me we'd just have a big BBQ and have a great big party. We have the hall on the beach sooooo Beach party!

Well, not all of us even thought about weddings as young girls. Personally, I'm convinced that the huge focus on weddings--when a girl is way too young to have one and doesn't know whom, if anyone, she will marry--is a big disservice to girls.

Moreover, even if you got a Platinum Wedding, it would only be one day of your life. How does it make sense to plan a one-day party for 20 or more years? What is important is that you end up married to someone you love. And that can happen even if it's just the two of you at the courthouse.

The first thing I do when I when I realize I can't afford something I can't dream is wake up.

My first thought was, "marry the man of your dreams." I know it's easy to say, but it's the marriage that matters, not the wedding.

The one rule I set for myself (& broke a few times, of course) was that the wedding could not be something that made me miserable. If it's stressing you out that much, take a step back and just imagine saying your vows, dancing with each other, etc. Those are the important parts, and they are virtually free!

If it helps, in other posts today, brides explained that they hardly noticed - if at all - all the little details that they focused on when they were planning. So when you get wrapped up in those details - and we all did/do - take a deep breath and remind yourself that that's not the important part.

Your idea sounds great - will it combine with your FH's?

I agree with Glenn.

Do what you can afford, and still give yourselves and your guests a great time. That horse-drawn carriage that Cinderella had? You don't need it.

I know it is hard, but maybe you should make some compromises. Do what you can and plan a honeymoon for later. You can do it like 5-6 months after the wedding or go on it on your 1 year ann. I will probably have my honeymoon later bc I can spend that 2k on photos and then save up for months so I can go on my honeymoon. So I can get the photo package I want and the honeymoon I want.

It is hard to not have your 'dream' wedding but think of the big picture. You will have the love of your life. Forget the rest.

There are many ways you can do this ... push the wedding back, take on an extra job, or just let the little things go ... My wedding is in 2 weeks, honestly I am not having the wedding I dreamed of either ... but in the end I'm still marrying my FS ... and that really is all that matters

I never dreamed about my wedding or being a bride when I was a young girl. To be honest the feelings that I have for FH have taken me by surprise and that fact that I want to be that bride and have the wedding he and I have imagined together blows me away because it has never been who I am. Point is everyone has different ideas.

We are currently planning two weddings in our house and my daughter is one of those women who has always dreamed of a big wedding. Her budget is 5k but when all is said and done I think it will be closer to 6k. If we weren't DIY'ers and I didn't haggle every vendor she would be closer to 15k but I won't let that happen. There are things she would like to have and its fun to window shop but she understands that when it all comes down to it she is marrying her "true love" and all of the extras don't matter.

@SoontobeMrs.D, My FH works every ot shift he can get to pay for our extras and my daughter and her FH both took part time jobs at night for extras.

@Kimi, bad girl! LOL

I echo Glenn, Kimi and Brian. If you find that you cannot afford the wedding you hoped for, you scale back.

Honestly, spending a lot of money, on one day, especially in todays economy, is actually not the smartest thing that someone should do. If spending $8,000 on a wedding is rough, what will you do should you lose your job? Think about it.

The details don't matter. Whether it's an $80,000 event with scroll invitations, 8 live bands and each guest gets their own waiter, or a backyard bbq where your dad fires up the grill- it's still your wedding. At the end of the day, you aren't anymore, or any less married!

What's more important to you? A dream day- or a dream life? Cut back the guest list significantly. Family and the people you like better anyway... Everyone else can screw themselves. Then, maybe you can have some savings left over for things like- oh, maybe buying a house, or retiring, or starting a college fund for your future children...

I have seen this a lot on WW. People who don't have enough money for their dream wedding. I guess saving for something this big isn't what people focus on until they are engaged.

I never dreamed of my wedding or being a bride. It was incomprehensible because I had never met the person I wanted to marry. It is about being married - not a wedding. One life lesson is to focus on what you have - not what you do not have. You will be exhausted and miserable otherwise. That said, you can either move your wedding date, scale back your expenses, or increase your income /savings between now and then.

Your hilarious Kimi.

Going into debt is a terrible thing, and a terrible feeling.

It's best to do what you can within means, and cut back on things that are not quite as important to you and spend the most on the stuff that means alot to you. Like pictures so you can always look back on your special day.

And of course, if you are marrying the man of your dreams then none of that stuff matters anyway.

People get so wraped up in pleasing the guests. But it's all about the couple. Does your dream wedding have 300 guests, or is it more simple on a beach. Personally if I could turn back time I would have done a destination. Simple. Easy. I'm not even spending the average cost on my wedding & i'd rather have new floors in my house instead of paying for 200 people to eat. Do what makes you happy, and DON'T forget the real reason for marriage. It's not the food, the cake, the flowers, it's you and him. Personally, I like smaller weddings.

I agree with Kimi. Get on welfare so they'll pay for your food and then use the money for your wedding. Then get student loans and use that money for the wedding too. So easy.

Someone tell me where it is written that we are all entitled to a "dream wedding"? I would like the 1966 baby blue mustang for sale on my block but I will continue to drive by it in my Honda Accord.

Grow up, have the wedding you can afford and be happy you are marrying someone you love that much to make that committment. Jeesh. Of all the things to complain about, to whine that you can't have a dream wedding.